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🏆 Wanker of the Week Awards 🏆

Nominations closed at midnight BST - the list is as below!

@lavendersilk for declaring @Bry1313 and @salciousmonkey22 perfect gentlemen
@Bry1313 for being a whiney arse
@SalaciousMonkey22 for thinking he has any say in matters wankery
@Wand3rlust for claiming @LadyLascivious was going to do something that clearly wasn’t going to happen
@Bry1313 for disparaging @morelikeasong ‘s wife
@morelikeasong for white knighting when her wife deserved both the kill and the nomination
@Wand3rlust for self aggrandisement
@OrdinaryPerson for not appreciating the current superior panel of judge tenure to that of the previous incumbent. (aka @Bry1313 aka worst panel of judge in living memory. You may have lost the tag – the description still applies)
@Mrtenant for whining for the award instead of wanking
@lavendersilk for her need to hand out campaign advice
@OrdinaryPerson for forgetting that @Wand3rlust is totally not a wanker and is actually adorable
@crazychemgirl for hassling @Wand3rlust
@Mrtenant for giving @morelikeasong a sad reaction
@SalaciousMonkey22 for questioning the best panel of judge since the OG
@Mrtenant for disappointment
@OrdinaryPerson for creepy role play x 2
@SalaciousMonkey22 for making @StillRain question if she is seeing double. Double
@Wand3rlust for flirting on the job
@jason28053 for liking a post even though he is on a break.
@SalaciousMonkey22 and @Amanda330 for forgetting that @Wand3rlust is the hot one WITH the fucking spreadsheet
@Wand3rlust for continuing to deny what a 1st class wanker she isn’t, cos she’s totally adorable and not a wanker at all.
@SalaciousMonkey22 for broken emojis
@lavendersilk for spelling adorable wrong
@Wand3rlust for having no better comeback than a two pence insult
@ydahecnot for making it sound like he don’t Customs
@lavendersilk for conflicting @SalaciousMonkey22
@StillRain for get (another) room.
@SalaciousMonkey22 for inability to speak a language anyone understands
@Lmizzler for terrible “excel”ling.
@StillRain for linguistic determinism
@StillRain for judging @OrdinaryPerson ‘s role play instead of their wanking
@Kitty_so_frisky because she obviously is jealous she wasn't mentioned in the wankery
@Wand3rlust for pretending she has things to do that aren’t wanking
@lavendersilk for totally kissing up to the panel of judge
@StillRain sigh, for being deeply hurtful yet accurate
@Wand3rlust for any of you thinking you make sexier spreadsheets than @Bry1313, i just don’t whine whine whine whine
@Amanda330 for one of the most egregious suck ups that have ever sucked up
@Bry1313 for saying this before @OrdinaryPerson did
@OrdinaryPerson for thinking they’d be whine whine whine whine
@Bry1313 for obviously not spending enough time reading the hard work of the adorable judge like @OrdinaryPerson did
@OrdinaryPerson for thinking @Bry1313 didn’t read the work of the wanker panel of judge and for sucking up to said panel of judge
@Bry1313 for making @SalaciousMonkey22 think “man he’s posting a lot.”
@SalaciousMonkey22 for post stalking
@Bry1313 for waving it in our faces and calling it stalking.
@Bry1313 for implying @SalaciousMonkey22 is old and busted not new and cool like XLOOKUP
Everyone for bringing @AmberLGreen down to this level
@StillRain for claiming perfect grooming
@Bry1313 and @SalaciousMonkey22 for monopolizing this thread with talk of movies instead of starting another movie thread
@Bry1313 for turning this thread to absolute shit. The volume of posts are insanely high, most of the comments are boring, and the wankery is at an all time low.
@LadyLascivious1 for an obviously terrible sense of humour
@Wand3rlust for not admitting what makes her the best judge.
@LadyLascivious1 for aggressive aggression. We only accept passive aggression here at Lit
@Lmizzler for being a Brutus
@Lmizzler for sucking up, forgetting @Wand3rlust is the panel of judge and probably other things she hasn’t thought of yet.
@Wand3rlust for turning @Lmizzler ‘s compliment against him
@lavendersilk for sucking up
@Wand3rlust for continuing to deny what a complete wanker she actually is
@Bry1313 for trying to continue being relevant in this thread
@Wand3rlust for continued disparagement of the previous panel of whine whine whine whine whine
@SalaciousMonkey22 for being such a forgettable wanker.
@SalaciousMonkey22 for being so forgettable we had to fact check. Twice
@Mr_bogey for accusing @Amanda330 of bragging.
@Mr_bogey for asking a stupid question
@jason28053 for blaming boobs for anything but inspiring a good time
@Taegul for spewing vicious lies about the great Taylor Alison Swift
@jason28053 for inordinately sucking up
@Taegul for thinking bullshit is science.
@Taegul for a terrible joke
@jason28053 for thinking he knows what @Amanda330 will or won't nominate
@jason28053 for not knowing that sucking up will always get you nominated
@InThe312 for fucking the OG panel of judge and thinking that gives them the right to have an opinion on anything
@InThe312 for being a wanker
@jason28053 for thirst
@SalaciousMonkey22 for making fun of @crazychemgirl ‘s clarification
@Lmizzler for missing all of our fun
@Amanda330 for using the wrong acronym for a whole week
@Mr_bogey because @crazychemgirl misses his witty thirst in Shenanigans x 2
@SalaciousMonkey22 for his excessive use of the “sure” voca
@crazychemgirl for not being able to hear vocas
@Tigobitties98 for staring at @SirConradPeckereye ‘s monocle hanging off his belt
@crazychemgirl for making @Wand3rlust type shit out when she is extremely busy – lucky she is adorable and totally not a wanker and did it with love. Yep.
@SalaciousMonkey22 for stupidly suggesting wankers can share
@SalaciousMonkey22 for THE AUDACITY
@Bry1313 for using the word 'titties' when quoting @Wand3rlust. And also for now making her type it. AGAIN
@Wand3rlust for making @Bry1313 think of Pmann in a wanking booth
 
Well, after a mental week last week, you lot have either stopped noticing wankers (unlikely), stopped being wankers (unlikelier) or just couldn't be arsed to annoy the fuck out of me, cos you had other people to annoy the fuck out of - I'm going with that one!

Well after a close run thing and not many to choose from - on volume alone it should have been @Bry1313 - AGAIN - however such is his level of wankery that he doesn't even win this award - what a wanker!

However one wanker did stick out, and not in his wildest dreams did he ever think that he would win

View attachment 2342503
View attachment 2342504
Congrats, @Taegul - you weren't nominated much, but the one nomination secured your crown. Look what you made me do... sadly this is no love story, and you're the problem, it's you. With such lack of style, you were never gonna shake this off, and this is karma. I knew you were trouble, but I don't want any bad blood. Don't blame me - it's hard being the anti- hero.
The love felt for the goddess, Taylor Alison Swift is SO great - I had a blank space, baby.... and I wrote your name.

is it over now? - not yet - I have a few more days of being the best panel of judge since the OG - nominations for my final week will close at midnight on Tuesday BST, when some other poor sap fucking mug honoured Litster will take the reins...

Happy wanking!
 
Wand3rlust said:
Well, after a mental week last week, you lot have either stopped noticing wankers (unlikely), stopped being wankers (unlikelier) or just couldn't be arsed to annoy the fuck out of me, cos you had other people to annoy the fuck out of - I'm going with that one!

Well after a close run thing and not many to choose from - on volume alone it should have been @Bry1313 - AGAIN - however such is his level of wankery that he doesn't even win this award - what a wanker!

However one wanker did stick out, and not in his wildest dreams did he ever think that he would win

View attachment 2342503
View attachment 2342504
Congrats, @Taegul - you weren't nominated much, but the one nomination secured your crown. Look what you made me do... sadly this is no love story, and you're the problem, it's you. With such lack of style, you were never gonna shake this off, and this is karma. I knew you were trouble, but I don't want any bad blood. Don't blame me - it's hard being the anti- hero.
The love felt for the goddess, Taylor Alison Swift is SO great - I had a blank space, baby.... and I wrote your name.

is it over now? - not yet - I have a few more days of being the best panel of judge since the OG - nominations for my final week will close at midnight on Tuesday BST, when some other poor sap fucking mug honoured Litster will take the reins...

Happy wanking!
Click to expand...
I hope the next auspicious panel of judge is @Lmizzler

...we are still doing this, right?
 
Wand3rlust said:
Well, after a mental week last week, you lot have either stopped noticing wankers (unlikely), stopped being wankers (unlikelier) or just couldn't be arsed to annoy the fuck out of me, cos you had other people to annoy the fuck out of - I'm going with that one!

Well after a close run thing and not many to choose from - on volume alone it should have been @Bry1313 - AGAIN - however such is his level of wankery that he doesn't even win this award - what a wanker!

However one wanker did stick out, and not in his wildest dreams did he ever think that he would win

View attachment 2342503
View attachment 2342504
Congrats, @Taegul - you weren't nominated much, but the one nomination secured your crown. Look what you made me do... sadly this is no love story, and you're the problem, it's you. With such lack of style, you were never gonna shake this off, and this is karma. I knew you were trouble, but I don't want any bad blood. Don't blame me - it's hard being the anti- hero.
The love felt for the goddess, Taylor Alison Swift is SO great - I had a blank space, baby.... and I wrote your name.

is it over now? - not yet - I have a few more days of being the best panel of judge since the OG - nominations for my final week will close at midnight on Tuesday BST, when some other poor sap fucking mug honoured Litster will take the reins...

Happy wanking!
Click to expand...
Okay, valid,
 
Wand3rlust said:
Well, after a mental week last week, you lot have either stopped noticing wankers (unlikely), stopped being wankers (unlikelier) or just couldn't be arsed to annoy the fuck out of me, cos you had other people to annoy the fuck out of - I'm going with that one!

Well after a close run thing and not many to choose from - on volume alone it should have been @Bry1313 - AGAIN - however such is his level of wankery that he doesn't even win this award - what a wanker!

However one wanker did stick out, and not in his wildest dreams did he ever think that he would win

View attachment 2342503
View attachment 2342504
Congrats, @Taegul - you weren't nominated much, but the one nomination secured your crown. Look what you made me do... sadly this is no love story, and you're the problem, it's you. With such lack of style, you were never gonna shake this off, and this is karma. I knew you were trouble, but I don't want any bad blood. Don't blame me - it's hard being the anti- hero.
The love felt for the goddess, Taylor Alison Swift is SO great - I had a blank space, baby.... and I wrote your name.

is it over now? - not yet - I have a few more days of being the best panel of judge since the OG - nominations for my final week will close at midnight on Tuesday BST, when some other poor sap fucking mug honoured Litster will take the reins...

Happy wanking!
Click to expand...
Umm, wow. Ok. Let me first start by saying I've been pretty sick and have almost totally lost my voice, so a Vocaroo acceptance speech is out of the question. ATM, I sound like I've been chain smoking for 85 years straight....so basically, my voice is almost as bad as Taylor Swift's singing voice. Yes, it's that bad! What a coincidence that @Amanda330 and I were just discussing Brazilian Fart Porn, and now I'm pretty much winning because of it! And if this is what wins me a WOW award, you might as well etch my name in there for the next 10 years straight. :ROFLMAO:

Now for the grattitude. I'd like to thank the best musical group on the planet for helping me develop my wonderful taste in good music....Tool. I really don't know where I'd be without their art. Probably in an insane asylum, swimming in a vat of Hormel chili while listening to Taylor Swift songs on permanent repeat. *Shudders*

Thank you, @Amanda330 for nominating me. I know it's because of our mutual disdain for singers that sound like dying coyotes caught in a bear trap at night howling at the moon.

I also want to thank everyone in the Sex & Shenanigans thread for posting 99,999 times just so I could be number 100,000. It really means a lot to me that you guys would all be so dedicated to my Lit legend status. God, I'm fighting back tears here.

Thank you @Wand3rlust for running out of any candidates whatsoever so I could win this consolation prize. I am honored!

And, saving the best for last, I want to thank me. I mean, let's face it, if it wasn't for me, this award wouldn't be possible. I'm so proud of myself right now, I think my chances of "getting lucky" with myself tonight just went up drastically.

Lastly, I do not want to thank @TotallyNotTaegul . She is annoying as fuck and I really don't understand why she hasn't faked her own death and left Lit yet.

Bring it on, Swifties. This Knight of Poonshire is ready to do battle!

https://www.aboutbritain.com/images/articles/medieval-knights-armour-sword-100371884.jpg
 
Tan
Taegul said:
Umm, wow. Ok. Let me first start by saying I've been pretty sick and have almost totally lost my voice, so a Vocaroo acceptance speech is out of the question. ATM, I sound like I've been chain smoking for 85 years straight....so basically, my voice is almost as bad as Taylor Swift's singing voice. Yes, it's that bad! What a coincidence that @Amanda330 and I were just discussing Brazilian Fart Porn, and now I'm pretty much winning because of it! And if this is what wins me a WOW award, you might as well etch my name in there for the next 10 years straight. :ROFLMAO:

Now for the grattitude. I'd like to thank the best musical group on the planet for helping me develop my wonderful taste in good music....Tool. I really don't know where I'd be without their art. Probably in an insane asylum, swimming in a vat of Hormel chili while listening to Taylor Swift songs on permanent repeat. *Shudders*

Thank you, @Amanda330 for nominating me. I know it's because of our mutual disdain for singers that sound like dying coyotes caught in a bear trap at night howling at the moon.

I also want to thank everyone in the Sex & Shenanigans thread for posting 99,999 times just so I could be number 100,000. It really means a lot to me that you guys would all be so dedicated to my Lit legend status. God, I'm fighting back tears here.

Thank you @Wand3rlust for running out of any candidates whatsoever so I could win this consolation prize. I am honored!

And, saving the best for last, I want to thank me. I mean, let's face it, if it wasn't for me, this award wouldn't be possible. I'm so proud of myself right now, I think my chances of "getting lucky" with myself tonight just went up drastically.

Lastly, I do not want to thank @TotallyNotTaegul . She is annoying as fuck and I really don't understand why she hasn't faked her own death and left Lit yet.

Bring it on, Swifties. This Knight of Poonshire is ready to do battle!

https://www.aboutbritain.com/images/articles/medieval-knights-armour-sword-100371884.jpg
Click to expand...
You're welcome, baby. My cock pocket has never been prouder. 💋
 
M
Taegul said:
Umm, wow. Ok. Let me first start by saying I've been pretty sick and have almost totally lost my voice, so a Vocaroo acceptance speech is out of the question. ATM, I sound like I've been chain smoking for 85 years straight....so basically, my voice is almost as bad as Taylor Swift's singing voice. Yes, it's that bad! What a coincidence that @Amanda330 and I were just discussing Brazilian Fart Porn, and now I'm pretty much winning because of it! And if this is what wins me a WOW award, you might as well etch my name in there for the next 10 years straight. :ROFLMAO:

Now for the grattitude. I'd like to thank the best musical group on the planet for helping me develop my wonderful taste in good music....Tool. I really don't know where I'd be without their art. Probably in an insane asylum, swimming in a vat of Hormel chili while listening to Taylor Swift songs on permanent repeat. *Shudders*

Thank you, @Amanda330 for nominating me. I know it's because of our mutual disdain for singers that sound like dying coyotes caught in a bear trap at night howling at the moon.

I also want to thank everyone in the Sex & Shenanigans thread for posting 99,999 times just so I could be number 100,000. It really means a lot to me that you guys would all be so dedicated to my Lit legend status. God, I'm fighting back tears here.

Thank you @Wand3rlust for running out of any candidates whatsoever so I could win this consolation prize. I am honored!

And, saving the best for last, I want to thank me. I mean, let's face it, if it wasn't for me, this award wouldn't be possible. I'm so proud of myself right now, I think my chances of "getting lucky" with myself tonight just went up drastically.

Lastly, I do not want to thank @TotallyNotTaegul . She is annoying as fuck and I really don't understand why she hasn't faked her own death and left Lit yet.

Bring it on, Swifties. This Knight of Poonshire is ready to do battle!

https://www.aboutbritain.com/images/articles/medieval-knights-armour-sword-100371884.jpg
Click to expand...

As a major Swiftie I am both disgusted and pleased at you taking out this week’s award. My inner turmoil on this, is only bested by the torment and delicious misery I feel listening to the tortured poets department for the 23rd time this week.

Congratulations, and get out. 👉🏻
 
Wand3rlust said:
Nominations closed at midnight BST - the list is as below!

@lavendersilk for declaring @Bry1313 and @salciousmonkey22 perfect gentlemen
@Bry1313 for being a whiney arse
@SalaciousMonkey22 for thinking he has any say in matters wankery
@Wand3rlust for claiming @LadyLascivious was going to do something that clearly wasn’t going to happen
@Bry1313 for disparaging @morelikeasong ‘s wife
@morelikeasong for white knighting when her wife deserved both the kill and the nomination
@Wand3rlust for self aggrandisement
@OrdinaryPerson for not appreciating the current superior panel of judge tenure to that of the previous incumbent. (aka @Bry1313 aka worst panel of judge in living memory. You may have lost the tag – the description still applies)
@Mrtenant for whining for the award instead of wanking
@lavendersilk for her need to hand out campaign advice
@OrdinaryPerson for forgetting that @Wand3rlust is totally not a wanker and is actually adorable
@crazychemgirl for hassling @Wand3rlust
@Mrtenant for giving @morelikeasong a sad reaction
@SalaciousMonkey22 for questioning the best panel of judge since the OG
@Mrtenant for disappointment
@OrdinaryPerson for creepy role play x 2
@SalaciousMonkey22 for making @StillRain question if she is seeing double. Double
@Wand3rlust for flirting on the job
@jason28053 for liking a post even though he is on a break.
@SalaciousMonkey22 and @Amanda330 for forgetting that @Wand3rlust is the hot one WITH the fucking spreadsheet
@Wand3rlust for continuing to deny what a 1st class wanker she isn’t, cos she’s totally adorable and not a wanker at all.
@SalaciousMonkey22 for broken emojis
@lavendersilk for spelling adorable wrong
@Wand3rlust for having no better comeback than a two pence insult
@ydahecnot for making it sound like he don’t Customs
@lavendersilk for conflicting @SalaciousMonkey22
@StillRain for get (another) room.
@SalaciousMonkey22 for inability to speak a language anyone understands
@Lmizzler for terrible “excel”ling.
@StillRain for linguistic determinism
@StillRain for judging @OrdinaryPerson ‘s role play instead of their wanking
@Kitty_so_frisky because she obviously is jealous she wasn't mentioned in the wankery
@Wand3rlust for pretending she has things to do that aren’t wanking
@lavendersilk for totally kissing up to the panel of judge
@StillRain sigh, for being deeply hurtful yet accurate
@Wand3rlust for any of you thinking you make sexier spreadsheets than @Bry1313, i just don’t whine whine whine whine
@Amanda330 for one of the most egregious suck ups that have ever sucked up
@Bry1313 for saying this before @OrdinaryPerson did
@OrdinaryPerson for thinking they’d be whine whine whine whine
@Bry1313 for obviously not spending enough time reading the hard work of the adorable judge like @OrdinaryPerson did
@OrdinaryPerson for thinking @Bry1313 didn’t read the work of the wanker panel of judge and for sucking up to said panel of judge
@Bry1313 for making @SalaciousMonkey22 think “man he’s posting a lot.”
@SalaciousMonkey22 for post stalking
@Bry1313 for waving it in our faces and calling it stalking.
@Bry1313 for implying @SalaciousMonkey22 is old and busted not new and cool like XLOOKUP
Everyone for bringing @AmberLGreen down to this level
@StillRain for claiming perfect grooming
@Bry1313 and @SalaciousMonkey22 for monopolizing this thread with talk of movies instead of starting another movie thread
@Bry1313 for turning this thread to absolute shit. The volume of posts are insanely high, most of the comments are boring, and the wankery is at an all time low.
@LadyLascivious1 for an obviously terrible sense of humour
@Wand3rlust for not admitting what makes her the best judge.
@LadyLascivious1 for aggressive aggression. We only accept passive aggression here at Lit
@Lmizzler for being a Brutus
@Lmizzler for sucking up, forgetting @Wand3rlust is the panel of judge and probably other things she hasn’t thought of yet.
@Wand3rlust for turning @Lmizzler ‘s compliment against him
@lavendersilk for sucking up
@Wand3rlust for continuing to deny what a complete wanker she actually is
@Bry1313 for trying to continue being relevant in this thread
@Wand3rlust for continued disparagement of the previous panel of whine whine whine whine whine
@SalaciousMonkey22 for being such a forgettable wanker.
@SalaciousMonkey22 for being so forgettable we had to fact check. Twice
@Mr_bogey for accusing @Amanda330 of bragging.
@Mr_bogey for asking a stupid question
@jason28053 for blaming boobs for anything but inspiring a good time
@Taegul for spewing vicious lies about the great Taylor Alison Swift
@jason28053 for inordinately sucking up
@Taegul for thinking bullshit is science.
@Taegul for a terrible joke
@jason28053 for thinking he knows what @Amanda330 will or won't nominate
@jason28053 for not knowing that sucking up will always get you nominated
@InThe312 for fucking the OG panel of judge and thinking that gives them the right to have an opinion on anything
@InThe312 for being a wanker
@jason28053 for thirst
@SalaciousMonkey22 for making fun of @crazychemgirl ‘s clarification
@Lmizzler for missing all of our fun
@Amanda330 for using the wrong acronym for a whole week
@Mr_bogey because @crazychemgirl misses his witty thirst in Shenanigans x 2
@SalaciousMonkey22 for his excessive use of the “sure” voca
@crazychemgirl for not being able to hear vocas
@Tigobitties98 for staring at @SirConradPeckereye ‘s monocle hanging off his belt
@crazychemgirl for making @Wand3rlust type shit out when she is extremely busy – lucky she is adorable and totally not a wanker and did it with love. Yep.
@SalaciousMonkey22 for stupidly suggesting wankers can share
@SalaciousMonkey22 for THE AUDACITY
@Bry1313 for using the word 'titties' when quoting @Wand3rlust. And also for now making her type it. AGAIN
@Wand3rlust for making @Bry1313 think of Pmann in a wanking booth
Click to expand...
You left out @Sirwanksalot

Pity. Seems like winning material to me.
 
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