Sex & Shenanigans

[Deleted member 6592667]

Once someone broke up with me via text poem.

And then they called and were like “why didn’t you write back? I thought we would argue about it and then things would be fine.” Lol

A girlfriend once hit me up for money and broke up with me. In the same text message.

 

[BigBallsCanuck]

On this topic… what does everyone think about outdoor sex?
Are you a fan?

I love it. However, there are definitely downsides.
One time I was fucking in a park at night and my ass got sooo bitten by mosquitoes. Thank god this was before my mosquito allergy developed because that would have been truly miserable.

And I’m thinking about a tropical location… heat and humidity. Sure, I’d be down for a few passionate, sweaty, outdoor fucks, but mostly I’d probably want to do it inside with a/c.

YES! Love it! Have had lots in so many places. Tropical Caribbean ocean is great as are jungle streams! Forest fucking in British Columbia where I live, or on mossy bluffs beside the sea, sometimes in view of passing boaters . . .

 

[VoraciousValue]

No, I DM you the poetry of my favorite drunk. I was sober at the time.

Which one? There's been so many championship alcoholic poets.

 

[BrendaBear]

This is not true.

Have you hear RJ’s jokes? Well have you???

I pick on RJ for fun, because it is our joke together. If at any time he asked me to stop, I would do so and publicly apologize profusely if I thought he was insulted, or took my bantering seriously.

 

[UnquietDreams]

Which one? There's been so many championship alcoholic poets.

Dylan Thomas. THE Champion Alcoholic Poet. Bukowski couldn't clean his whiskey glass.

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

Exactly!!!!

Listen to Nebs! Nebs is good! Nebs is wise!!

He fucking better listen to me. He got “it’s a small world after all” stuck in my head for like 4 months straight and he owes me some peace of mind for this. @HeavyBalls

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

A girlfriend once hit me up for money and broke up with me. In the same text message.

Did you deny her financial request? Fucking bitch

 

[VoraciousValue]

Dylan Thomas. THE Champion Alcoholic Poet. Bukowski couldn't clean his whiskey glass.

Dylan Thomas was actually the first name that came to mind!

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

This sounds like a very specific kink,

You’ll never guess who it was

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

You’ll never guess who it was

Was it Fire Dick!?!!?

 

[BrendaBear]

You’ll never guess who it was

Oh hell! Now we all will be wondering who the twatwaffle is….

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

Of course. How else would you make friends here?

By having it forced on you in chats you didn't consent to?

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

You don’t want to bring me. I’ll eat all of your ice cream.

IYKYK

But you're bringing pie so it's ok? I'm not gonna be your daddy too for free, ok?

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

Was it Fire Dick!?!!?

YUP.

 

[HeavyBalls]

He fucking better listen to me. He got “it’s a small world after all” stuck in my head for like 4 months straight and he owes me some peace of mind for this. @HeavyBalls

It's a world of laughter, it's a world of fear...

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

YUP.

I have an entire head canon building about this man now.

 

[Deleted member 6592667]

Did you deny her financial request? Fucking bitch

Yup! And the next day posted vacation pics.

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

YUP.

What's fire dick?

 

[MindYaBitness]

Once someone broke up with me via text poem.

And then they called and were like “why didn’t you write back? I thought we would argue about it and then things would be fine.” Lol

I've had quite a bit of terrible teenage poetry sent my way back in the day, but never a break up poetry. Who takes the time to do that?

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

It's happened a lot in my life. But I'm still here.

I will take them on the small world ride and drown them in the dirty Disney water

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

What's fire dick?

Oh don’t front.

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

Yes, I'm down. Camping, hiking, hell, just going for a walk, I'm willing to sneak off anytime/anywhere. The problem is I have to lure my partner to it by threatening to strip down & walk about naked if he doesn't oblige me off the path.

Excuse me, Sir, all of your emojis are non-functioning (not even the eggplant, I'm so disappointed in you!) Please review, revise, and re-turn in if you want partial credit

Yes, amongst thexsee of lurkers, weirdos, & fetishists, once in awhile you get to talk to an actual decent person and make friends.



Yep, hot tub, bath tub, even showers sometimes, feel like dry sex because the water dilutes the natural lubricants. Not a fan. Water foreplay, yes. Water sex, not so much.

I'm convinced no one actually fucks in water other than in movies and whoever wrote those scenes have obviously not actually tried it.

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

I will take them on the small world ride and drown them in the dirty Disney water

The number of people that attempt to dump loved ones ashes in that ride is…disturbing.

 

[UnquietDreams]

Outside of randoms asking if you would sell your panties, show your feet, or be the “mom” in their role play, do people use the DM feature to actually chat? Is it a faux pas to just reach out and say “hi”?

In all seriousness, and besides drunk DMing poems, I have had several wonderful conversations with people here. I refer to them as "sidebars," heh. I have had a few randos, but they are easily ignored. But reaching out to say "hi" (or, you know, "boobs,") is a great way to connect.

That said, I am a guy, and apart from...seven minutes ago... I have never posted a nude or near nude.

 

[MindYaBitness]

I will take them on the small world ride and drown them in the dirty Disney water

I like you