Sex & Shenanigans

[JerseyJade]

I am going to answer. You’re staying single cuz you’re still young and you are gonna taste the rainbow and it’s gonna be goddamn glorious.

I've been tasting quite a few rainbows lately.

 

[ShaneoD]

Yup you went 0-60 in 3.8 seconds

I hate when that happens, then you have to do the "That's never happened before" speech and........ I'll stop talking now

 

[dawn_of_night]

I’m assuming you’re not a police officer lol

Hey....
#Bluelivesmatter

 

[BrendaBear]

Glad you had a great time...I married one, the hotness wears off

Well… get it back!

(Hopeless romantic here)

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

It's probably easier to joke about guns when I've only ever seen a couple in real life, they're highly regulated here. And no I'm not lol

That is .. so foreign to me. Lol. I mean this guy was a legit police officer, so of course he had a gun… but I mean, out in the sticks here, lots of people have em

 

[UnquietDreams]

Maybe buy the handcuffs, bro??

Oh, handcuffs are good.

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

Hey....
#Bluelivesmatter

Do you see how I support the police!? I fuck them randomly to thank them for their service.

 

[MindYaBitness]

Well… get it back!

(Hopeless romantic here)

Lol, you misunderstood. He's still quite attractive to me. I've had a crush on that guy since I was 14. That hasn't ever gone away.

However, the whole, man-in-uniform, cop-with-handcuffs thing loses it's shine pretty quick. Truth is, bullet proof vest create skin problems, the uniform & equipment take forever to get off so quickies are difficult, and it's hard to get frisky when he's just spent the last 15 hours cataloging child sex abuse images and just wants to take a shower & cry. Love them or hate them, that was my reality of being married to a cop for 20+ years

 

[ShaneoD]

That is .. so foreign to me. Lol. I mean this guy was a legit police officer, so of course he had a gun… but I mean, out in the sticks here, lots of people have em

My dad had a shotgun when I was a kid his licence literally said where he could use it and how many bullets he could buy a month, they're not common at all here.

 

[BrendaBear]

It's probably easier to joke about guns when I've only ever seen a couple in real life, they're highly regulated here. And no I'm not lol

I forget that, and take that freedom for granted. My Dad taught me how to shoot at 7 or 8 years old…. Which was more than a few years ago…

 

[MindYaBitness]

My dad had a shotgun when I was a kid his licence literally said where he could use it and how many bullets he could buy a month, they're not common at all here.

My dad was a professional hunter. We had rifles & shotguns in every closet & corner of our house. I've been reloading shotgun shells since I was a toddler!

It's hard to wrap my brain around a shotgun being that regulated. Rifles, sure, but a shotgun seems odd

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

Glad you had a great time...I married one, the hotness wears off

It usually does. I think it’s probably less a cop thing and more a long term relationship thing lol

 

[dawn_of_night]

Do you see how I support the police!? I fuck them randomly to thank them for their service.

I condone this activity

 

[ShaneoD]

I've been tasting quite a few rainbows lately.

Are we just going to skip this fine fact or should I attempt not to look, well, thirsty

 

[UnquietDreams]

Jade!!!!!
You bet yer sweet pretty ass I’s a ho. At least I was when I was single. Miss being a ho. .

That's why I got divorced: to reclaim my ho-dom.

 

[dawn_of_night]

Do you see how I support the police!? I fuck them randomly to thank them for their service.

Also... Just so y'all know I learned how to use emojis?!!!?!??

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

I've been tasting quite a few rainbows lately.

Oh sweet baby. I’m so jelly I’m jam .
And how do those skittles taste?

 

[MindYaBitness]

It usually does. I think it’s probably less a cop thing and more a long term relationship thing lol

Definitely a cop thing. He's still pretty hot all on his own. Hotter now w/o the weight of the job wearing on him.

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

I hate when that happens, then you have to do the "That's never happened before" speech and........ I'll stop talking now

SNORT
I feel like that only works once with a girl. The speech. After like 16 years I’ve gotten suspicious

 

[ShaneoD]

My dad was a professional hunter. We had rifles & shotguns in every closet & corner of our house. I've been reloading shotgun shells since I was a toddler!

It's hard to wrap my brain around a shotgun being that regulated. Rifles, sure, but a shotgun seems odd

That's probably better than my experience, I remember him letting me clean the heavy motherfucker once, and being so clueless about the thing thinking it might go off, while it was obviously completely empty

 

[UnquietDreams]

@morelikeasong

No it was when you had a Millennium Falcon.

Geek girls are so fucking hot, the lot of you.

 

[JerseyJade]

Oh sweet baby. I’m so jelly I’m jam .
And how do those skittles taste?

Yummy. I'm addicted.

 

[ShaneoD]

SNORT
I feel like that only works once with a girl. The speech. After like 16 years I’ve gotten suspicious

The fall backs "you just look so beautiful and........" I don't think any man has ever finished that sentence

 

[BrendaBear]

Lol, you misunderstood. He's still quite attractive to me. I've had a crush on that guy since I was 14. That hasn't ever gone away.

However, the whole, man-in-uniform, cop-with-handcuffs thing loses it's shine pretty quick. Truth is, bullet proof vest create skin problems, the uniform & equipment take forever to get off so quickies are difficult, and it's hard to get frisky when he's just spent the last 15 hours cataloging child sex abuse images and just wants to take a shower & cry. Love them or hate them, that was my reality of being married to a cop for 20+ years

Oh good! Truly, your being in love with him still, makes me super happy! Thank you for clarifying!

 

[Deleted member 6592667]

LOL smoooooth way to let us all know you’re also good with your tongue

Yeah, I tried to be subtle and modest. Modesty is what makes me better then the rest of you fuckers.