Sex & Shenanigans

Yo. I just pulled out a file folder of parodies I have write and sang them to my bf, trying so desperately not to crack up at my own superb wit, and that motherfucker just sat there grinding bullets with a dremel tool. I’m actually not sure wtf he was doing but what he wasn’t doing was acknowledging my star like entertainment skills. I ended up singing them to the dog and saying I’m a fucken genius.
Wait, what’s this now?
 
Those who wear makeup … do you put all your makeup on with your dominant hand or do you use both depending on the side of the face you’re working on?
Stage makeup traumatized me for life and I can only wear eye and lip makeup on very rare occasions, nothing but moisturizer on the rest of my skin. When I do wear eye or lip makeup, it’s usually lipstick and eyeliner and mascara on right eye with my right hand, and mascara on my left eye with my left hand.

This is honestly one of my favorite things in history.
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That works for me

But I'm also thinking about someone making me a hat made of cheese too. And imagining taking nibbles when I get hungry even though I'm not supposed to.
Don’t be ridiculous! The hat is a sombrero made of a giant tortilla chip, and the top is indented to accommodate real melted nacho cheese (none of the processed crap) and one has to sing “Nacho Man” a la Homer Simpson. This is the way!

 
A vest, that is going to take a lot of cheese. 😳😂
I mean…my areolae alone would require 2 whole slices of mozzarella 🙈

Wouldn’t want that @PlanetaryNebula but really it should be @Kitty_so_frisky award, she knew what she was doing when she tagged me over there
What did I do? I haven’t caught up on that thread yet either

No we’re good here. CCM tolerates the shit out of me and I’m weirder than you are
I think I got called out at least once for taking the sex talk too far and had to point at the thread title. 🤭 Don’t recall who it was though
 
And the trailing scent of Drakkar Noir mixed with Axe body spray.
Axe body spray is for middle school boys, only.

I think it’s something bros use 🤷‍♀️

Annnnd I figured it out right after I posted that comment. The magic still exists though. Because you went through the effort to do that for the sake of a joke. Like I said, Nebby likey.
I once replaced the bottom half of this meme with a pic of my tits when my best friend was having a bad day 🤭 I think there’s an emoji link to it somewhere in my post history here too
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It’s not about individual contribution it’s about team results! Also I’m still figuring out the gif size limits. I think @Photog1rl clued me in last night but I was pretty drunk so I should revisit that post 🤣
This is important information!

You, my dear, are simply the best!
https://voca.ro/1iSMg6ROx9gy
I listen to the whole thing waiting for you to sing Simply the Best 😜
 
I feel personally attacked by this.


This is me too, except my pussy swears I’m still 19 🤭


I caught up on Outlander season 7 this weekend and 1 of the characters was writing a book about his experience and considering calling it The Time-Travelers Guide to the Galaxy and I’ve never appreciated him more 🤓


Fucking truth! When a Floridian dies and goes to hell, they’re like “well, at least it’s a dry heat.”


It’s the metal and orgies 🤘🏽


Nebs, you’re a fucking genius and I’d listen to your parodies any day!
Also, @Tigobitties98 @morelikeasong and I need someone to finish rewriting the lyrics of Santa Jason to the tune of Santa Baby, but with @jason28053 buying us sex toys, lingerie, mani-pedis, etc 🤣
I can help with this!!
 
Axe body spray is for middle school boys, only.


I once replaced the bottom half of this meme with a pic of my tits when my best friend was having a bad day 🤭 I think there’s an emoji link to it somewhere in my post history here too
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This is important information!


I listen to the whole thing waiting for you to sing Simply the Best 😜
I wanna see the titty meme
 
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