Anyone from the UK?

[Fufumberuk]

Was I really only on here 7 hours ago? Bloody windy night and squeaky roof!

At least it wasn't due to a squeaky bed

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

Good morning guys and girls.

Wonky nearly died a few hours ago.

 

[HornyKatie1979]

Good morning. Think I got through the night unscathed, apart from barely sleeping.

 

[Saltfountain]

Good morning guys and girls.

Wonky nearly died two hours ago.

Can't leave that hanging...

 

[AmandaKellyUK]

Can't leave that hanging...

Perhaps that was the issue

 

[Saltfountain]

Should have just stayed here

Welcome to the UK chat!

 

[Saltfountain]

Perhaps that was the issue

Michael Hutchence fan you think?

Too soon?

 

[JackVettriano]

Just lurking for the sexy accents

Well you’ve found James Bond, I have a west coast Scottish accent and I have a talent for talking the nickers of people around here

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

Can't leave that hanging...

My neck was almost hanging by a thread!

I was out in the yard at 3:30am with the dog, making sure all was well as she's afraid of the wind. Suddenly I hear a smash and there a smashed roof tile on the floor (not mine). So i am bending down to pick it up and I get clobbered on the back of the head by another!

Meanwhile the dog had decided she'd had enough and left me outside dodging death.

Wonky was nearly brown bread. I'm not being dramatic, shut up! Where's my blowjob?

 

[Saltfountain]

My neck was almost hanging by a thread!

I was out in the yard at 3:30am with the dog, making sure all was well as she's afraid of the wind. Suddenly I hear a smash and there a smashed roof tile on the floor (not mine). So i am bending down to pick it up and I get clobbered on the back of the head by another!

Meanwhile the dog had decided she'd had enough and left me outside dodging death.

Wonky was nearly brown bread. I'm not being dramatic, shut up! Where's my blowjob?

Of all the people to tag asking for a blowjob...


...I'm the best

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

Of all the people to tag asking for a blowjob...


...I'm the best

Oh I wasn't asking you. I'll settle for a manly hug from you with the words "I'm glad you're not dead Wonky. You're my brother from another (older) mother!"

That's too close for comfort!

You ain't kidding!

 

[Saltfountain]

Oh I wasn't asking you. I'll settle for a manly hug from you with the words "I'm glad you're not dead Wonky. You're my brother from another (older) mother!"

My mam is in her 80s...

 

[AmandaKellyUK]

Oh I wasn't asking you. I'll settle for a manly hug from you with the words "I'm glad you're not dead Wonky. You're my brother from another (older) mother!"

I can picture this taking place with a Michael Bay soundtrack and spinning camera effect

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

My mam is in her 80s...

It's alright. Mine looks like she's in her 80's.

It's alright. I can say that. Me and her don't have a brilliant relationship.

I can picture this taking place with a Michael Bay soundtrack and spinning camera effect

YES! It was also like the movie Twister... Except y'know... Without a Twister.

 

[Saltfountain]

I can picture this taking place with a Michael Bay soundtrack and spinning camera effect

Shit, if Michael Bay is involved we'll explode in a fireball any second...

 

[RosewoodTulip]

My neck was almost hanging by a thread!

I was out in the yard at 3:30am with the dog, making sure all was well as she's afraid of the wind. Suddenly I hear a smash and there a smashed roof tile on the floor (not mine). So i am bending down to pick it up and I get clobbered on the back of the head by another!

Meanwhile the dog had decided she'd had enough and left me outside dodging death.

Wonky was nearly brown bread. I'm not being dramatic, shut up! Where's my blowjob?

But the pup is ok though?

I'm kidding. Hope you're ok and it didn't knock too much sense into you

 

[Saltfountain]

But the pup is ok though?

I'm kidding. Hope you're ok and it didn't knock too much sense into you

That's the Rosie I know and love.

Caring to the point of apathy...

 

[Fufumberuk]

Just lurking for the sexy accents

"Good morning" lol. Not sure you can distinguish my accent from that?

 

[Wriggle]

My accent makes "couldn't" sound like "cunt".
So not posh.

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

But the pup is ok though?

I'm kidding. Hope you're ok and it didn't knock too much sense into you

The pup went inside and was laid on her bed when I stumbled in, swearing like a fishwife.

I'm okay. I'm still the same idiotic er... idiot and my split personality is intact!

 

[terriblesecrets]

Was I really only on here 7 hours ago? Bloody windy night and squeaky roof!

Ahhh you were just looking for opportunities to get naughty darling

 

[PennyCleaver]

My neck was almost hanging by a thread!

I was out in the yard at 3:30am with the dog, making sure all was well as she's afraid of the wind. Suddenly I hear a smash and there a smashed roof tile on the floor (not mine). So i am bending down to pick it up and I get clobbered on the back of the head by another!

Meanwhile the dog had decided she'd had enough and left me outside dodging death.

Wonky was nearly brown bread. I'm not being dramatic, shut up! Where's my blowjob?

Hope you’re dog is okay and not still afraid its blowing a hooley here

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

Hope you’re dog is okay and not still afraid its blowing a hooley here

Thank you!

Unfortunately the dog is deathly afraid of anything including her own shadow at the moment. We think she had a tough life on the street when she was dumped.

 

[terriblesecrets]

I've just finished my bran flakes

Yeah looks like no one is serving breakfast today.. so my crusty bread rolls it is then .
Where is @Anastasia1999 when you need here?

 

[NorthernCardinal]

My neck was almost hanging by a thread!

I was out in the yard at 3:30am with the dog, making sure all was well as she's afraid of the wind. Suddenly I hear a smash and there a smashed roof tile on the floor (not mine). So i am bending down to pick it up and I get clobbered on the back of the head by another!

Meanwhile the dog had decided she'd had enough and left me outside dodging death.

Wonky was nearly brown bread. I'm not being dramatic, shut up! Where's my blowjob?

Glad you're ok