Litiquette VII

[ChainedUp]

Is it fling or is it a thing? Is it easier to tell the two part online than in RL? Do you work to make sure that either way, your partner knows which it is(most will say yes and yet we all know it to be no for many). Is online a fling by definition or is it just as likely to be a thing as in RL.

Tuesday morning things to mull over…

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Is it fling or is it a thing? Is it easier to tell the two part online than in RL? Do you work to make sure that either way, your partner knows which it is(most will say yes and yet we all know it to be no for many). Is online a fling by definition or is it just as likely to be a thing as in RL.

Tuesday morning things to mull over…

Communication is communication is communication.

Some of us thrive in the written form. Others are energy readers.

The only thing I've learnt: until it's said, it doesn't actually exist or matter.

 

[StacyLeigh]

Is it fling or is it a thing? Is it easier to tell the two part online than in RL? Do you work to make sure that either way, your partner knows which it is(most will say yes and yet we all know it to be no for many). Is online a fling by definition or is it just as likely to be a thing as in RL.

Tuesday morning things to mull over…

I don’t believe it’s any easier to tell someone’s intentions (fling or real) online than in an in-person setting – likely the opposite given the distance online provides. AGG is right that honest communication is the only real way to tell and I do ensure that those close to me understand my intentions. You also have to trust your own instincts and not be a passive dummy behind a screen.

I don’t think it can be said that online relationships automatically fall in the fling category. It’s certainly easy to lead a superficial online existence, but genuine connections can (and do) form, if you allow them.

 

[Endless_Night]

Is it fling or is it a thing? Is it easier to tell the two part online than in RL? Do you work to make sure that either way, your partner knows which it is(most will say yes and yet we all know it to be no for many). Is online a fling by definition or is it just as likely to be a thing as in RL.

Tuesday morning things to mull over…

Flings are easy enough, online or off. They may be easier online, less muss, less fuss, at least potentially.

Eh. I have…well, I was going to say I have always been upfront about where I was, but that's probably not entirely true. So often words I've said - that seemed 100% clear - have not been clear to the other party. I've had guys get upset when we didn't have sex. When I've told them, straight up, "There will be no sex."

I mean, go figure?


Presumably that means I'm not a great communicator.

 

[Endless_Night]

Communication is communication is communication.

Some of us thrive in the written form. Others are energy readers.

The only thing I've learnt: until it's said, it doesn't actually exist or matter.

Every single word of this post.

 

[SMNaughtywife]

Is it fling or is it a thing? Is it easier to tell the two part online than in RL? Do you work to make sure that either way, your partner knows which it is(most will say yes and yet we all know it to be no for many). Is online a fling by definition or is it just as likely to be a thing as in RL.

Tuesday morning things to mull over…

So, I wanna know what man says this online: you have great tits, sexy curves and a filthy mouth. I have no interest in sharing anything remotely personal, no go on small talk back and forth and I just want you to help me get off? You down giving me an epic blow job with or without certainty that you’ll get off too?
Oh! I only have 45 minutes inbetween this and that.
This is honest communication, yes?

Well of course I’d like to piss away some of my time, where do I sign up at?

 

[hotwords229_A]

So, I wanna know what man says this online: you have great tits, sexy curves and a filthy mouth. I have no interest in sharing anything remotely personal, no go on small talk back and forth and I just want you to help me get off? You down giving me an epic blow job with or without certainty that you’ll get off too?
Oh! I only have 45 minutes inbetween this and that.
This is honest communication, yes?

Well of course I’d like to piss away some of my time, where do I sign up at?

Sounds like a real go-getter!

I mean, it is honest and I appreciate honesty because it helps know who and what you’re getting into.

Someone who says that is clear that they are selfish, uninteresting, and a real douchebag—but still, wouldn’t you rather know that up front?

I would.

 

[ChainedUp]

“Just once” wouldn’t be enough, we all know this to be true. Knowing this would you still take “just once”?

 

[AngelicaS1780]

“Just once” wouldn’t be enough, we all know this to be true. Knowing this would you still take “just once”?

Of course.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

“Just once” wouldn’t be enough, we all know this to be true. Knowing this would you still take “just once”?

Absolutely.

It wouldn't be enough but it would be better than never. We won't let the very good be the enemy of perfect.

 

[Wand3rlust]

“Just once” wouldn’t be enough, we all know this to be true. Knowing this would you still take “just once”?

What if "just once" couldn't be enough? What if once was ALL it could ever be and knowing that breaks you into pieces before the once has even happened, been arranged or talked about?

Would you still do the "just once"?

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

What if "just once" couldn't be enough? What if once was ALL it could ever be and knowing that breaks you into pieces before the once has even happened, been arranged or talked about?

Would you still do the "just once"?

That's how I read the question.
My answer remains.

It reminds me of a quite from a movie I love - "I'd rather 5 minutes of amazing than a lifetime of nothing special."

 

[Wand3rlust]

That's how I read the question.
My answer remains.

It reminds me of a quite from a movie I love - "I'd rather 5 minutes of amazing than a lifetime of nothing special."

I wonder how you go back. After.

I'm not saying I disagree - far from it.

 

[Orchidea73]

I wonder how you go back. After.

I'm not saying I disagree - far from it.

It could be that "just once" sucked big time and "just once" becomes "too much".

 

[Daisy_Love]

I wonder how you go back. After.

I'm not saying I disagree - far from it.

I think it depends what the ‘just once’ is.

 

[tnman03]

“Just once” wouldn’t be enough, we all know this to be true. Knowing this would you still take “just once”?

It's all about the context, isn't it? But yeah, dependant on circumstances certainly.

And PLP makes a good point with her comment on 5 minutes of something spectacular vs interminable mundane.

 

[Wand3rlust]

I think it depends what the ‘just once’ is.

This is what I mean - maybe there isn't one answer - it is dependent on the situation.
I think seizing the day, the moment has it's place. But sometimes the pain, the heartache would be too much.

And then to not have the possibility of that "just once" again... how do you ever go back?

Or it becomes not "just once" - but then again, and again.. and that brings its own complications.

I think I may be overthinking this.

 

[Daisy_Love]

This is what I mean - maybe there isn't one answer - it is dependent on the situation.
I think seizing the day, the moment has it's place. But sometimes the pain, the heartache would be too much.

And then to not have the possibility of that "just once" again... how do you ever go back?

Or it becomes not "just once" - but then again, and again.. and that brings its own complications.

I think I may be overthinking this.

No, you’re not x
I know exactly what you mean

 

[AngelicaS1780]

What if "just once" couldn't be enough? What if once was ALL it could ever be and knowing that breaks you into pieces before the once has even happened, been arranged or talked about?
Would you still do the "just once"?

For the right person, I would rather have the pain of being broken into pieces than the pain of it never happening. I have been broken before. I am sure that I will be broken again.

I wonder how you go back. After.
I'm not saying I disagree - far from it.

I don't think that you ever go back completely. Not if this person or experience is as meaningful to you as you express in your question.

 

[AngelicaS1780]

This is what I mean - maybe there isn't one answer - it is dependent on the situation.
I think seizing the day, the moment has it's place. But sometimes the pain, the heartache would be too much.

And then to not have the possibility of that "just once" again... how do you ever go back?

Or it becomes not "just once" - but then again, and again.. and that brings its own complications.

I think I may be overthinking this.

I don't think that you are overthinking this, but rather that you are thinking about several different situations. I think the answers depend on the specific situation and the people involved. There's a personal weighing of risk versus reward, and while many issues can be anticipated, there may be those that surprise you. I can only speak from my very limited experiences and what I have gleaned through talking to people here.

 

[Wand3rlust]

For the right person, I would rather have the pain of being broken into pieces than the pain of it never happening. I have been broken before. I am sure that I will be broken again.


I don't think that you ever go back completely. Not if this person or experience is as meaningful to you as you express in your question.

And as Fara says, maybe you just do - maybe you just do go back.

I suppose if you have no one else to consider in this scenario then maybe you do. But if you have no one else to consider, why should it be "just once".

Surely the reasons it can only be "just once" must come into play. Other people getting hurt, either unintentionally or through selfish actions. Are you not being more selfless by denying yourself the "just once" knowing the heartache you could cause not only to yourself but to others?

now I am DEFO overthinking...

 

[Wand3rlust]

I don't think that you are overthinking this, but rather that you are thinking about several different situations. I think the answers depend on the specific situation and the people involved. There's a personal weighing of risk versus reward, and while many issues can be anticipated, there may be those that surprise you. I can only speak from my very limited experiences and what I have gleaned through talking to people here.

hehe - yep - I'm overcomplicating the question.

And I think you are right.

 

[Mei5ter]

I wonder how you go back. After.

I'm not saying I disagree - far from it.

Well, I hope you go back feeling enriched from having had that one truly special experience.

I can still savour the happy memories of the bottle of 1974 Ardbeg while sipping my £8.99 GlenSporran from Aldi.

 

[Endless_Night]

“Just once” wouldn’t be enough, we all know this to be true. Knowing this would you still take “just once”?

Am I the only one who read this and thought sometimes once can be TOO much?



Reading through the answers it appears so.

 

[Orchidea73]

Am I the only one who read this and thought sometimes once can be TOO much?



Reading through the answers it appears so.

That's what I said too. lol
Especially when you tend to idealize and fantasize too much, the chances are it will be.