Stories with descriptive sex

SwimmerSamantha

Experienced
Joined
May 21, 2013
Posts
56
I struggle with erotica.

In that I find the build up and anticipation the most arousing part. When it comes to the eventual sex it's always a bit of a let down comparatively. There's only so many ways to describe two bodies (or more if they're lucky) thrusting and moaning etc.

So I was wondering if people would be willing to share some links to stories that do it particularly well or in a clever poetic manner or any other noteworthy reason? (Bonus points if written by a woman from a women's perspective)
 
So you want slow build with a spicy payoff?

These are my slowest build stories:

https://www.literotica.com/s/a-girl-on-the-bus
- starts with 750 words, progresses to a Part Six with 4k or so. Readers commented it was worth the wait.

https://www.literotica.com/s/the-floating-world-1
- one reader said this:
But this story wonderfully shows how third person narration can be used to convey the inner activity of two characters, even during the intricate steps of their dance. We see the evening not as we would see it in real life---where we know our own feelings but can only guess at our partner's---but privy to both sides, able to see the uncertainty and hopefulness and playfulness and arousal on both sides as flirtation turns to courtship and courtship turns to foreplay. It's two intimate stories, really, interwoven at every scene. A tour-de-force of patient, loving, doubly imagined detail.

Forgive me ahead of reading: I'm a male who adores and respects women. It shows in my stories. Why discriminate? :)
 
I struggle with erotica.

In that I find the build up and anticipation the most arousing part. When it comes to the eventual sex it's always a bit of a let down comparatively. There's only so many ways to describe two bodies (or more if they're lucky) thrusting and moaning etc.

So I was wondering if people would be willing to share some links to stories that do it particularly well or in a clever poetic manner or any other noteworthy reason? (Bonus points if written by a woman from a women's perspective)

I think many of us struggle with this. The build-up is usually the story, making it the interesting part to tell. Once the sex happens, the story tends to be complete. One solution I try to use is to save some things of the story arch to be resolved with and, preferably, during the climactic sex scene. Hopefully, the sex scene is then more than just about body parts.
 
I'm not claiming I do it particularly well or note-worthily, but most of my stories are from a woman's perspective. I try to include what she's thinking about the other person and the surrounding circumstances.

Third Time Getting Lucky or Into the Woods are probably the best for heterosexual vanilla sex.
 
I’m better at writing the sex than the build up lol. I also tick your box for being a woman. Here are two from a woman’s perspective
Short and sweet, just a sex scene of 750 words Primal Prey https://www.literotica.com/s/primal-prey-1 (there is a companion 750 words of the same sex scene from a man’s POV )

For an epically long sex scene (so long even I think it goes on too long, but cowritten with someone who was determined not to end the scene) https://www.literotica.com/s/a-nice-mug-of-tea
 
Well, let's see. From my own stories, Love Long Gone has got some good reviews and comments, as has Save the Last Dance. Both of them involve a fair bit of the anticipatory build-up you are looking for.

Very broadly speaking and at the risk of seeming judgemental, I think there are two ways to write sexy tales. One can use a minimal story to support the description of sex. The other is to use sex to enrich a good story. Therein lies the difference between porn and erotica.

I hope you find what you are looking for.
 
Rather than think of it as buildup + sex, I try to think of it a little differently.

For me, in an erotic story, the sex is the whole point. I don't see it as "a good story with some sex in it." I see it as a story about sex, broadly defined -- meaning the central point of the story is something sexual, erotic, or kinky. Think of the "sex" as the culmination of the story, and focus on writing it that way. When you get to the "sex" part, write it as though you are resolving loose ends or unresolved desires or conflicts that are presented earlier in the story. Focus on the people who are interacting rather than thinking of it as something mechanical or anatomical.
 
I've been trying to get a handle on writing the sex, and everything else, in ways that don't become boring or repetitive. Don't think I'm there yet.

I edited this, removing the quote. I'm screwed-up and hit quote rather than post.
 
Focus on the people who are interacting rather than thinking of it as something mechanical or anatomical.

I agree with this.

Not to say that I ignore the creatural aspect of things -- I absolutely revel in dirty talk and nasty detail and in porny language and framing, frankly -- but I think of it by analogy with action movies. The just-okay or mediocre ones have action scenes that the story takes time out for. The scenes might be satisfying, but they're just-okay no matter how flashy they are if the story stops while we take time to appreciate Jet Li's wirework, for instance.

The really good action movies use the action to also develop characters, motivations, and conflicts both internal and external. The classic example of this is the wuxia movie where the hero has to get himself in spiritual balance and adjust the resulting technique and maybe resolve a previous conflict with his companions in order to overcome the baddie. That particular trope became a cliche in that genre, admittedly, but that's because it's just too good to pass up a lot of the time. It brings depth to the action and makes it more meaningful, more fun. Jackie Chan is famously good at this.

To provide a specific example: most action scenes in James Bond movies are just-okay. The action scene in Casino Royale where Bond chases a master parkour artist through a construction site is great: it tells us everything about Bond's character, and that of his quarry, by showing.

By the same token, bad or just-okay sex scenes are disposable. Nothing happens in them except the sex. Good sex scenes, like good action scenes, develop the characters and the plot and are always moving the story forward.

(For my money, I'd go a bit further and say that for me, what the story should be building toward is what happens after the sex, not the fact that the sex happens. That's my specific taste, though.)

I don't remotely claim to write from a female perspective, but otherwise, most of my sex scenes are governed -- or I try to govern them, anyway -- by that philosophy.
 
Last edited:
Do it like Kilgore "Philip Jose Farmer" Trout:

Making love on a picnic is nothing new. But this was on top of the head of the Sphinx of Giza.

Simon Wagstaff was not enjoying it one hundred percent. Ants, always present at any outdoor picnic anywhere, were climbing up his legs and buttocks. One had even gotten caught where nobody but Simon had any business being. It must have thought it had fallen down between the piston and cylinder of an old-fashioned automobile motor.

Simon was persevering, however. After a while, he and his fiancée rolled over and lay panting and staring up at the Egyptian sky.
 
I like writing the sex scenes. I simply imagine myself as being one of the people having sex and then writing what I think is happening, the action, the reactions, the emotional and physical responses, the thoughts, the feelings, the experiences.
 
I’m better at writing the sex than the build up

I'm the opposite. Writing the build up isn't a problem for me. It's the actual sex is where I get paralyzed and struggle. I'll write a paragraph or two, read it back to myself and think to myself "God, this sounds like the worst tripe ever!" Then I delete it and start over again. Writing the sex scenes in my stories takes much longer than the rest of the story itself, even though the sex may be only 15-20% of the total words.
 
It’s been said umpteen times, but I’ll say it again: different people enjoy reading different things. If you find the build up and anticipation the most interesting and engaging part to write, focus on that part. There are readers out there who will enjoy reading it as much as you enjoyed writing it. The fact that when tab A slips into slot B (or wherever) it’s all over in the blink of an eye won’t really bother them.
 
I'm the opposite. Writing the build up isn't a problem for me. It's the actual sex is where I get paralyzed and struggle. I'll write a paragraph or two, read it back to myself and think to myself "God, this sounds like the worst tripe ever!" Then I delete it and start over again. Writing the sex scenes in my stories takes much longer than the rest of the story itself, even though the sex may be only 15-20% of the total words.

The first sex scene I ever wrote sounded diabolical, it’s something I’ve worked really hard in learning how to do right IMHO. The pacing, to the sentence structure and punctuation all feeds into how I write a scene. I’ve even analysed how much emotion, like humour, to use in counter to practical details of what goes where. The first thing I practiced was including the non obvious erotic elements like the feel of long hair on a stomach or a hand on an arm. I treat writing a sex scene like a technical task, but feedback would suggest I’m hitting the mark for quite a few men and women. To get there I’ve practiced writing a lot of sex scenes, many way outside my comfort zone, just to challenge myself.
 
I only have one published story here, but people seem to like it.

I think the trick to writing sex scenes is to come at them sideways. Yeah there’s only so many ways to inset tab A in slot B, so leave that part mostly unsaid. Instead concentrate on the little telling details, like the way her sweaty hair sticks to the nape of her neck, or how his hands pin her wrists to the wall. Flicker between these little details and fleeting thoughts and sensations. Your reader will fill in the boring hydraulics themselves.
 
Descriptive sex

Sorry, not female perspective (might try that in a while). I have some good literature analytical background, but when I started writing here I didn't think of the product as stories. Someone already differentiated between porn and erotica; I write mostly porn. A story has a conflict and a resolution. Most of my work is just sex scenes. I don't describe the houses, I don't send the characters to work, school, or restaurants. I just barely describe the characters because I want readers to project themselves into the scene. I also don't want 5k words of buildup to a 500-word payoff. If you track my work by date of submission (except for "Candy" because I wrote all that's done of that before I started posting here), you'll see I'm mixing in some actual stories. They might not be to your taste, and If I read the OP right, you're looking for examples of sex description that don't bore. I'm not sure I'm succeeding. There are certain conventions of genre I disdain, so I don't go too wild with different terms for sex organs: I tend to use "cock" and "pussy" again and again, because I think if the narrator uses a word, that's the word that person uses.
Also, I think I like female characters who talk very frankly and assertively about sex, so in contrast to what I said about POV above, much of this one is a woman telling a man about a sexual experience, while they share another sexual experience:
https://www.literotica.com/s/candy-pt-02-1
 
Last edited:
If you are telling a story, then I think it is important to not, in your writing mindset, separate the sex from the remainder of the story. The sex scenes should be as organic as the build-up and what comes after. By this I mean the oft-repeated fiction writing advice applies: show don't tell, and the best sex happens in the mind. The physical sensations may be mind-blowing, but how do those sensations weld -- good, bad, or indifferent -- into the characters' emotional perspective? What are they taking away from the experience? What are they getting that they need? Don't need? Don't want?

And what BrightShinyGirl said about little details and hydraulics.
 
.....So I was wondering if people would be willing to share some links to stories that do it particularly well or in a clever poetic manner or any other noteworthy reason? (Bonus points if written by a woman from a women's perspective)

LOL. Try one or two of mine. "F is for Fail" has a bit of sex in it and the links in my sig. Otherwise, hmmm, just pick a couple at random (but not Huginn's Yule or One Night in Xanadu, there's not to much sex in those).
 
The first sex scene I ever wrote sounded diabolical, it’s something I’ve worked really hard in learning how to do right IMHO. The pacing, to the sentence structure and punctuation all feeds into how I write a scene. I’ve even analysed how much emotion, like humour, to use in counter to practical details of what goes where. The first thing I practiced was including the non obvious erotic elements like the feel of long hair on a stomach or a hand on an arm. I treat writing a sex scene like a technical task, but feedback would suggest I’m hitting the mark for quite a few men and women. To get there I’ve practiced writing a lot of sex scenes, many way outside my comfort zone, just to challenge myself.

This is all good advice, especially the "non-obvious" things. I have to open my mind up a little more and get better at picturing things.

I really like this bit:

I’ve practiced writing a lot of sex scenes, many way outside my comfort zone, just to challenge myself.

I used to write small scenes, some including sex, others not, just to pass the time years ago. But I think this might be extremely helpful in just writing out a sex scene and see how it goes. And also do some, as you said, outside of my comfort zone. I think it can only help to improve my writing.
 
What works for me (and seems to work for my readers) is to focus not on the mechanics of sex but what's going on inside the heads of the characters. What are they expecting? What are they hoping for? What are they fearing? What distinguishes those reactions from what others might experience, and makes them unique characters that readers can identify with?
 
Back
Top