Let's Talk About... The Delicate Art Of Stable Management

[Wild_Honey_66]

Yes, I went there.

Come on, let's dish! Okay, seriously? I'm truly genuinely curious about how this works for other people. Y'all should know by now that I find human behavior endlessly fascinating, so come and give us a peek inside your brain!

• What is the process by which you add new members to your stable? How does one apply?
• How do you negotiate mutually agreeable terms with a potential inductee?
• Do you have a preferred number of stable inhabitants?
  Minimum/maximum occupancy?
• Does your herd engage in any sort of initiation ritual with a new stablemate?
• Do you have established rules or do you wing it?
• If you have rules, how have they changed over time?
• What are your views on discretion?
• How open are you with your stallions/mares about their co-workers?
• Is jealousy an issue? How do you address that?
• How do you handle conflict resolution?
• How do you thin the herd? What might be a reason for culling someone?
• Why is this subject so taboo? Fear of exposure? Fear of judgement? Feelings of guilt about behavior that you might not participate in offline?
• And lastly, Trekka wants to know whether your stalls are being occupied by horses, goats, puppies, fill in the blank.

I know this is a difficult topic for some, but please join in the conversation! Be as vague as you need to to feel comfortable, but at least chime in a little with what you feel okay sharing. We're here to exchange ideas and experiences and to learn from each other, we're not here to take advantage of those who are making themselves vulnerable by being transparent about this subject. Be kind and generous with each other, and be gracious to those with whom you disagree.

And I've brought my whip for the troublemakers, don't make me use it!

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

I'll be the first to admit that this topic makes me hella uncomfortable. It triggers all kinds of feelings of fear, insecurity, shame, humiliation... A real gold mine for a partner who knows how to walk that tightrope between my kink and my need for acceptance and approval.

UGH.

 

[OxfordJack]

People who know me know what I am like and what i was like...so I'll take the plunge!



[*]What is the process by which you add new members to your stable? How does one apply? no applicants as such...I just ask

[*]How do you negotiate mutually agreeable terms with a potential inductee? I tell them up front that I chat to others

[*]Do you have a preferred number of stable inhabitants? no more than three or four

Minimum/maximum occupancy?

[*]Does your herd engage in any sort of initiation ritual with a new stablemate? no

[*]Do you have established rules or do you wing it? wing it!

[*]If you have rules, how have they changed over time? I'm much more open now

[*]What are your views on discretion? I keep secrets where appropriate - and trust others to do the same

[*]How open are you with your stallions/mares about their co-workers? very open...they know I chat with others

[*]Is jealousy an issue? How do you address that? It has been...I deal with it as necessary...

[*]How do you handle conflict resolution?

[*]How do you thin the herd? What might be a reason for culling someone? lol---if anyone doesn't like the situation, they can leave

[*]Why is this subject so taboo? Fear of exposure? Fear of judgement? Feelings of guilt about behavior that you might not participate in offline? all of the above...I know I will be judged..I have been called a manwhore...but I've been here long enough not to worry about it

[*]And lastly, Trekka wants to know whether your stalls are being occupied by horses, goats, puppies, fill in the blank. various!
[/LIST]

[/QUOTE]

 

[OxfordJack]

I would add this is partly tongue in cheek...with an element of truth!

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Hi Jack!

Well. For being an out-of-the-closet manwhore, you were not as forthcoming as i had hoped.

But thank you for getting the ball rolling!

What motivated you to become more open and more flexible? What useful lessons did you learn about, er, 'multitasking' from the relationships that went sideways?

 

[OxfordJack]

Hi Jack!

Well. For being an out-of-the-closet manwhore, you were not as forthcoming as i had hoped.

But thank you for getting the ball rolling!

What motivated you to become more open and more flexible? What useful lessons did you learn about, er, 'multitasking' from the relationships that went sideways?

Guilt mainly...I'm expecting flack for this posting and I'm not proud of who I was as OD and OUJ. I'm trying now to be as open as possible.

lessons learned? It is easy to let emotions take charge...and this isn't a dating site!

Don't spread too thinly...focus on a few good people - which is what I'm doing.

(I can't believe I'm doing this!)

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Guilt mainly...I'm expecting flack for this posting and I'm not proud of who I was as OD and OUJ. I'm trying now to be as open as possible.

lessons learned? It is easy to let emotions take charge...and this isn't a dating site!

Don't spread too thinly...focus on a few good people - which is what I'm doing.

(I can't believe I'm doing this!)

Thank you so much for being willing to open up about this. I really appreciate your input.

How do you define 'as open as possible'?

 

[OxfordJack]

Thank you so much for being willing to open up about this. I really appreciate your input.

How do you define 'as open as possible'?

I guess I apologising for actions in the past...shedding the baggage perhaps?

I always tell people that I chat to others, I reveal my personal situation up front so if they are uncomfortable in any way they can ignore me.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Here’s a tip: Don’t say you love someone if you wouldn’t love them in the flesh. Good rule of thumb for any internet thing.

How do you feel like that rule is helpful?

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

I guess I apologising for actions in the past...shedding the baggage perhaps?

I always tell people that I chat to others, I reveal my personal situation up front so if they are uncomfortable in any way they can ignore me.

Well done.

Do your chat buddies know the names of your other ladies? Do you ever get sexy with two of them in separate conversations at the same time, without telling them?

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Prevents unrealistic expectations. Not everyone is on the same page here. Some are here to play. Some are here out of boredom. Loneliness. Sadness. Looking for adventure.
Be aware of the person with whom you’re speaking and their feelings by being clear about your own.

Great advice! Thank you.

 

[OxfordJack]

Well done.

Do your chat buddies know the names of your other ladies? Do you ever get sexy with two of them in separate conversations at the same time, without telling them?

no...that's where the discretion comes in.

and I would never chat to two at the same time.

 

[OxfordJack]

I used to, back in the day. A few simultaneous chats.
Blech.
I don’t recommend.

it gets messy!

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

no...that's where the discretion comes in.

and I would never chat to two at the same time.

Would you have one sexy chat and one non-sexy chat at the same time?

I used to, back in the day. A few simultaneous chats.
Blech.
I don’t recommend.

Blech because they wouldn't have appreciated it, if they'd known? Or blech because of how it made you feel?

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

it gets messy!

Ah ha ha ha ha

Metaphorically messy? Or... ?

 

[OxfordJack]

Would you have one sexy chat and one non-sexy chat at the same time?

no...I want to give all my attention to whoever I am talking to

 

[OxfordJack]

Ah ha ha ha ha

Metaphorically messy? Or... ?

lol...behave you!!

 

[Dribble]

Here’s a tip: Don’t say you love someone if you wouldn’t love them in the flesh. Good rule of thumb for any internet thing.

Quoted for truth. I will take this one step further...words are empty until actions show otherwise.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

no...I want to give all my attention to whoever I am talking to

Got it! Just wanted to clarify.

lol...behave you!!

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Quoted for truth. I will take this one step further...words are empty until actions show otherwise.

Hi Dribble!

 

[Dribble]

Hi Dribble!

Waving back. I will be curious to see where this goes. I view this very much like the poly threads here. I have nothing to give, but will read them

 

[mulehead61]

Yes, I went there.

Come on, let's dish! Okay, seriously? I'm truly genuinely curious about how this works for other people. Y'all should know by now that I find human behavior endlessly fascinating, so come and give us a peek inside your brain!

• What is the process by which you add new members to your stable? How does one apply?
• How do you negotiate mutually agreeable terms with a potential inductee?
• Do you have a preferred number of stable inhabitants?
  Minimum/maximum occupancy?
• Does your herd engage in any sort of initiation ritual with a new stablemate?
• Do you have established rules or do you wing it?
• If you have rules, how have they changed over time?
• What are your views on discretion?
• How open are you with your stallions/mares about their co-workers?
• Is jealousy an issue? How do you address that?
• How do you handle conflict resolution?
• How do you thin the herd? What might be a reason for culling someone?
• Why is this subject so taboo? Fear of exposure? Fear of judgement? Feelings of guilt about behavior that you might not participate in offline?
• And lastly, Trekka wants to know whether your stalls are being occupied by horses, goats, puppies, fill in the blank.

I know this is a difficult topic for some, but please join in the conversation! Be as vague as you need to to feel comfortable, but at least chime in a little with what you feel okay sharing. We're here to exchange ideas and experiences and to learn from each other, we're not here to take advantage of those who are making themselves vulnerable by being transparent about this subject. Be kind and generous with each other, and be gracious to those with whom you disagree.

And I've brought my whip for the troublemakers, don't make me use it!

You are really starting to make me crush on you.... Stable management...

 

[Deacon_Voss]

I can barely handle one, so no way I'd ever have a stable.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Waving back. I will be curious to see where this goes. I view this very much like the poly threads here. I have nothing to give, but will read them

Me, too!

Do you see the two things as connected? Do you think it makes a difference that Lit is online?

You are really starting to make me crush on you.... Stable management...

You know I was thinking of you the whole time I was writing this.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

I can barely handle one, so no way I'd ever have a stable.

What do you think you'd have to sacrifice in order to juggle, say... three to five?