Sexless Marriages

[jayjay04]

It's a familiar story.
I always say it takes two to tango but it also requires effort on both sides. Don't beat yourself up about it.it would be interesting to know how much additional friction has been caused by lockdown.

Not much really.

We had a big row over a couple of days when I found out she had been cheating on me. I can live with the fact she wanted to split up, but I went out and worked, made time for my family (albeit not my relationship looking back), I made tea every night (even though she worked 3 days a week) - I am not saying I was the perfect partner, but I wasnt bad by any means so I didnt really deserve what she has done.

I also didnt deserve to be lied to my face over and over again when I kept asking if there was someone else. I am pretty gutted that once it all blows over I wont see my little girl every day. I wont forgive her for what she has done even though I can understand why she wasnt happy as she should have talked to me or made a bit of effort before pulling my life apart after 13 years.

But that being said, she has broken it off with the other lad also (apparently) which was the one thing I asked for from her. I just couldnt get my head arounf how I could go and pick up/drop off my little girl seeing them playing happy families in what was my life. I more or less said if that happens then I dont want her in my life, we wont be friends or even amicable. She agreed to break it off, I dont mind if/when she meets someone else, but I cant look at them 2 knowing they both knew about me and still carried on and broke up my family.

Since then we have actually got on pretty well. There is nothing there for either of us or certainly not on my side but we are actually talking and laughing more together and despite the lockdown (we are still sticking to it as our little girl has/had something when she was a baby that might cause problems with corona) we are actually getting on pretty well together. To some extent it is like how we were before we got together.

She has apologised, called herself different things (slag etc) and just said she wanted the attention. Not much more to be said is there really. If she moves out, I dont see my little girl as much, she cant afford the house on her own so for the time being this works in a very strange way.

 

[10169kek]

I did it… I finally left... I’m living in my own place, and it’s so much better. We’re still friends but that’s about it. I don’t look at her sexually anymore. Her loss.

Good luck and have fun, I am happy for you. Although I am still with my wife, the looking at her sexually ended years ago.

 

[triciaNC]

Not what I expected

I’m 55 with a much higher sex drive than him. We have only been married a few years and while we were dating it was great...but now...nothing.

 

[NEOhio1972]

I’m 55 with a much higher sex drive than him. We have only been married a few years and while we were dating it was great...but now...nothing.

Sorry to hear it Tricia....... all we cando is on our own.....well......with a little belp from friends now and again

 

[NEOhio1972]

I’m 55 with a much higher sex drive than him. We have only been married a few years and while we were dating it was great...but now...nothing.

Sorry to hear it Tricia....... all we cando is on our own.....well......with a little help from friends now and again

 

[Volk359]

My husband hasn't touched me in over 4 years. He has made it clear he's not attracted to me and I am free to look elsewhere but honestly, that's almost more hurtful than just being ignored.

And because I know the questions are coming, yes that's me in my avatar but it is also from 8-10 years ago, just after our first child. After breast feeding 2 kids, nothing is as tight or perky as it once was.

You’re still a beautiful, sexy, woman and deserve much more that what you are given.

 

[TheMarksman]

My husband hasn't touched me in over 4 years. He has made it clear he's not attracted to me and I am free to look elsewhere but honestly, that's almost more hurtful than just being ignored.

And because I know the questions are coming, yes that's me in my avatar but it is also from 8-10 years ago, just after our first child. After breast feeding 2 kids, nothing is as tight or perky as it once was.

I’m so sorry to hear that Ashleigh.

I was going to say I’m sure you won’t have any trouble finding someone else, but that can take a while. But I’m not sure what’s worse: being told you’re free to look elsewhere or being told you won’t have your needs met but you can’t look elsewhere either.

Good luck in your quest.

 

[IASFPWTF]

I’m 55 with a much higher sex drive than him. We have only been married a few years and while we were dating it was great...but now...nothing.

I am willing to help any way you need...

 

[IASFPWTF]

My husband hasn't touched me in over 4 years. He has made it clear he's not attracted to me and I am free to look elsewhere but honestly, that's almost more hurtful than just being ignored.

And because I know the questions are coming, yes that's me in my avatar but it is also from 8-10 years ago, just after our first child. After breast feeding 2 kids, nothing is as tight or perky as it once was.

Doesn't matter. Being sexy and hot has nothing to do with tight or perky

 

[NEOhio1972]

Doesn't matter. Being sexy and hot has nothing to do with tight or perky

I think sexless can be relative.......sometimes just need more......and more.....and more.....and more..... and more........

And more

 

[Justcuriousguy]

My husband hasn't touched me in over 4 years. He has made it clear he's not attracted to me and I am free to look elsewhere but honestly, that's almost more hurtful than just being ignored.

And because I know the questions are coming, yes that's me in my avatar but it is also from 8-10 years ago, just after our first child. After breast feeding 2 kids, nothing is as tight or perky as it once was.

Not sure how old you guys are but I had the same attitude with my wife. She finally got me to agree to having blood work done and found my Testosterone level to extremely low. Doctor put me on weekly injections. Once the new hormone kicked in we couldn't get enough. We were constantly fucking and trying new things. I still have a large sex drive but she has tapered off and has nagging problems that keep her from enjoying sex. Thing is I still love her immensely and would never cheat. My life is good and if I want release I jack off.

Maybe get him to get his t-level checked

 

[philos]

Difficult to remain hopeful after a long time. I think now I’m just resigned to my fate. My sex life is essentially over and has been for some time. Anything else is a delusion.

 

[Lost_Yonder]

My husband hasn't touched me in over 4 years. He has made it clear he's not attracted to me and I am free to look elsewhere but honestly, that's almost more hurtful than just being ignored.

And because I know the questions are coming, yes that's me in my avatar but it is also from 8-10 years ago, just after our first child. After breast feeding 2 kids, nothing is as tight or perky as it once was.

I for one appreciate that within a marriage "attractiveness" is not solely physical attributes, but perceived emotional connection, histories of things said and done, and all other kinds of baggage. That being said, to shut the door on discussion or a willingness to work things out, to at least attempt to explore how to make things work, and to give a unilateral decision seems particularly problematic and I can only imagine quite hurtful.

His providing you an opening to find your sexual fulfillment elsewhere sounds like both a dare as well as an attempt to cover his own ass that is probably having his own affair.

the emotional disconnect seems quite deep from his side...

I hope you find the intimacy you so crave and deserve!

 

[Bigboobbabe]

I did it… I finally left... I’m living in my own place, and it’s so much better. We’re still friends but that’s about it. I don’t look at her sexually anymore. Her loss.

Riksteele:
I would love to hear more. I am considering leaving my husband and have some fear and doubts. What I don't doubt is that he no longer does anything for me sexually.

If you are up to share, I would love the PM>

Barb. 54. Married 34 years.

 

[Bpar721971]

Riksteele:
I would love to hear more. I am considering leaving my husband and have some fear and doubts. What I don't doubt is that he no longer does anything for me sexually.

If you are up to share, I would love the PM>

Barb. 54. Married 34 years.

I’m in the same boat as you. Male 54 athletic professional. Married 24 yrs.

 

[Mrswrong]

Im there too. My husband has no interest in sex, and its all I think about! Its been a few years now where I only touch myself!

 

[Mtnmike]

Im there too. My husband has no interest in sex, and its all I think about! I'm in the process of leaving (not our only issue), but its been a few years now where I only touch myself!

It's amazing the woman I hear say this, seems y'all are catching up with the sexless men in the world. I just can't understand when he has a willing partner that he's not interested in it. What is going on in the world today? My wife & I have been sexless for over 11 years now & the previous 8-9 years were maybe twice a year, so men step up & enjoy what you're being offered!!!
If any of the ladies would like to talk about it, I would like to hear your side of it.

 

[Hodes101]

I wonder if there is any ever any relationship ships that lasts more than few years where partners can still not keep their hands of each other?

My wife is slowly putting in weight due to depression/lack of exercise/kids and I still find her irresistible.

But all of those factors above keep the sex to a minimum.

It's very much one sided street.


And yes, before anyone comments, I do help at home with chores, kids etc. But depression is a condition with wide ranging factors/causes. I love and support her where I can/it is welcomed.

 

[southerngirl5577]

Yep, 43 BBW, married and sexless. Seems to be the going trend now days. Such a drag .

 

[NEOhio1972]

Yep, 43 BBW, married and sexless. Seems to be the going trend now days. Such a drag .

At least you have here to escape to. Think of all those poor "proper" people that just go it alone..... at least we have chat.....and stories....and hand....ha

 

[touchmysoul]

I wonder if there is any ever any relationship ships that lasts more than few years where partners can still not keep their hands of each other?

My wife is slowly putting in weight due to depression/lack of exercise/kids and I still find her irresistible.

But all of those factors above keep the sex to a minimum.

It's very much one sided street.


And yes, before anyone comments, I do help at home with chores, kids etc. But depression is a condition with wide ranging factors/causes. I love and support her where I can/it is welcomed.

I think this is common. I am in the same boat as your wife, put on weight, kids, depression/anxiety. My biggest issue is my marriage is a sham. We have sex but it is unfulfilling. My husband has a high sex drive but I don't think he cares who he is fucking as long as he gets off. There is zero intimacy. So I am lacking something much harder to fulfill.

 

[dumbmum]

22 years married and sex is rare and boring I want some excitement to have someone treat me like a slut

 

[Mtnmike]

I think this is common. I am in the same boat as your wife, put on weight, kids, depression/anxiety. My biggest issue is my marriage is a sham. We have sex but it is unfulfilling. My husband has a high sex drive but I don't think he cares who he is fucking as long as he gets off. There is zero intimacy. So I am lacking something much harder to fulfill.

I hear ya, what happened to all the exciting foreplay? God I miss it !!!

 

[Hodes101]

I hear ya, what happened to all the exciting foreplay? God I miss it !!!

Lol. Were all so different.


This is one of my issues with my sex life currently......

The rare times we do have sex, 90% of the time she wants a quicky in the morning. I typically accept it, but I strive for more. I want foreplay. I want to try different things in the bedroom.

I want to forefill fantasies. Or at least discuss them. I don't want a quick wam bam thank you mam. (Not all the time at least)

 

[TerryBrown6367]

Any one out there close to 806 I can help out?