Litiquette VII

My ability to provide high quality sex to my partner is:

  • I am without a doubt the highest quality sex partner there is. I will make you cum and I will cum, a

    Votes: 54 25.2%
  • I have more kinks than most, nothing inappropriate but you’ll be shocked at what I like

    Votes: 107 50.0%
  • I’m good. I get the job done, not much flair but there’ll be no need for masturbation after

    Votes: 46 21.5%
  • I mostly provide sex as a service. I’ve never really enjoyed it so I won’t seek it out, but when ask

    Votes: 1 0.5%
  • I’m as vanilla as it gets. I hope you have a great imagination, you’ll likely need it to keep things

    Votes: 6 2.8%

  • Total voters
    214
Not really a beach fan. 🤷🏻 For a few reasons:

Sun
Sweat
Sand
Saltwater
Swimsuits
Sunburn
Strangers

I don't like beach activities, and the sun gives me migraines and sunburn. My dad has had several melanomas removed from his face, so I'm hyper-sensitive about sun exposure now. Even with sunblock applied religiously and a hat at all times, I still get burned. I have pretty good skin for my age because I stay out of the sun as much as possible.

But I love to be in the water! I'd like to have a pool with some sort of shade structure over it. Clean water, no crowds, no sandy feet, easy access to restroom and kitchen. I can swim literally whenever I want to, I can skinny dip when the kids are asleep. Heaven.
 
Btw.
Trekka reporting live from the scene.
Y’all have seen reports of crowded FL beaches, right?
It’s sensationalist bullshit.

I can’t say I mind though, if it’s keeping the yahoos at bay.
Zero garbage on the sand or in the water today.
Not a single pop top.

Many fish though! Perfect snorkeling day! 😍

This is a blueprint into how my mind works.

Trekka brings up fake news crowded beaches.
I think: Masks
I wonder: Do you have to wear a mask on a nude beach?
I post a sub-question to Trekka’s question: Would you be more likely to visit a nude beach if you could wear a mask disguising your identity?
 
I guess that being naked wouldn’t prevent you from catching COVID so I assum face covering/ mask/ gargling disinfectant would still be advised.

Nudist beach wearing a mask? Hell no. I mean, let’s say I decide to hit the nudist beach with my Saddam Hussein mask. Perfect , identity protected. Potential issue is that night in the local restaurant or bar I am the one with red/brown body with a white neck and face 😂
 
Btw.
Trekka reporting live from the scene.
Y’all have seen reports of crowded FL beaches, right?
It’s sensationalist bullshit.

I can’t say I mind though, if it’s keeping the yahoos at bay.
Zero garbage on the sand or in the water today.
Not a single pop top.

Many fish though! Perfect snorkeling day! 😍

I think it depends on the beach. Camera don't lie. Ocean City, MD was so packed two weeks ago that I know people that are the cost of the room and came home. I'm sure some beach spots are more quiet. I think the news in FLA surrounded HS and College grads celebrating. Same with Myrtle. You know what's not fake news? Numbers spiking in FLA. Stay safe.
 
My favorite beach was the one next to the infinity pool at a resort I stayed at a few years ago. You could watch the waves and enjoy the breeze with no sand, saltwater, water critters, jellyfish, sharks, or seaweed wrapping around your legs and scaring you shitless. There was a swim-up bar and lounge chairs and umbrellas. All you needed was what you wanted to wear, sunscreen and a book.

But another awesome advantage to Texas is tubing on the river. Hook up a bunch of tubes with your friends, including one carrying a cooler of beer, and party all the way down the river. It's the quintessential Texas summertime party.

Sex on a beach? No thanks. It makes a better cocktail name than activity. Not only sand, but no-seeum bugs.
 
My favorite beach was the one next to the infinity pool at a resort I stayed at a few years ago. You could watch the waves and enjoy the breeze with no sand, saltwater, water critters, jellyfish, sharks, or seaweed wrapping around your legs and scaring you shitless. There was a swim-up bar and lounge chairs and umbrellas. All you needed was what you wanted to wear, sunscreen and a book.

But another awesome advantage to Texas is tubing on the river. Hook up a bunch of tubes with your friends, including one carrying a cooler of beer, and party all the way down the river. It's the quintessential Texas summertime party.

Sex on a beach? No thanks. It makes a better cocktail name than activity. Not only sand, but no-seeum bugs.

Yeah, tubing, canoeing, kayaking and just enjoying the rivers and creeks here in TN is a big thing as well. The lakes are always overflowing with people and boats of all types and sizes.

And for all of the comments about SOTB. Yep, the sand is pretty mean. I agree with Jenny, the cocktail's a whole lot easier.
 
This is a blueprint into how my mind works.

Trekka brings up fake news crowded beaches.
I think: Masks
I wonder: Do you have to wear a mask on a nude beach?
I post a sub-question to Trekka’s question: Would you be more likely to visit a nude beach if you could wear a mask disguising your identity?

Not at all. As someone else said, that would be a tan line nightmare and I already think tan lines are super tacky.

The whole point, well maybe not the whole point lol, of going to a nude beach is no tan lines! :)
 
Alrighty y’all - it’s beach day at Casa de Trekka!
*wakes up and checks phone*

Seas less than two feet
High tide’s at noon
Wind at 4 mph and no rain

That means we slather on the sunscreen, throw the snorkel gear bag in the back, whoop-whoop like little kids at the unexpectedly favorable marine forecast, grab some towels, a sheet, some snacks and some water and we boogie.

So, how do you go to the beach/lake/river?

Do you pack the kitchen sink? Rent an umbrella? Bring an inner tube? No sunscreen because you’re a dumbfuck? ;) (kidding, not all suns are created equal and mine is a serial killer)

Is the beach for lounging or playing? Eating and drinking? Would you rather go when it’s cooler? At night?

Sex on the beach? Yay or nay? Ok, blowjobs, then? :D

For all you crabby appletons and engineers that don’t like sand, why no beach for you? Do you pool? How do you pool?

And for those poor souls without a body of water nearby, SMNaughty I’m lookin at you! What is your perfect imaginary beach day? :)

How do you get your beach on?

The ocean. I live hours away. So it's mostly for Vacation. Lakes and Rivers are minutes away. Though the Rivers around me are huge Touristy areas because of the rapids. They draw crowds every year, and every year we have many casualties. There are crazy under-toes. and I have known many who've lost their lives, so I don't swim in them. I'll walk in, but I don't even go more than knee deep.

Mostly, they are for relaxing. I'll take my Ipod and or a book. Sun block, something to drink. Something to lay on. Change of clothes.

Our water is cold though. In New York. It was so damn warm!!! I loved being in the Ocean.

Sex once.. Too much sand in the Vajayjay! No..
Over rated.
 
Pmann, we agree again! Sensationalist crowded beach baloney! Wtf is the news up to down here?!

Also, why do engineers all hate sand? Does it scramble your circuits? ;)

I saw so many sting rays today... ! 💚

Because we don’t like tracking the sand back into the car and eventually our houses. We are a civilized group and we like to be clean and well kept. Sand does not promote this.
 
Because we don’t like tracking the sand back into the car and eventually our houses. We are a civilized group and we like to be clean and well kept. Sand does not promote this.

Aren't there showers at the beach?
 
Aren't there showers at the beach?

Yes, there are. :)
You make an excellent point.

I also managed to go to the beach today, and I’m now home... looking around... nope, no sand, floors are clean. Huh!
 
I get the comment about no tan lines, but I’m wondering, for the more shy among us—would wearing a face mask (and therefore concealing your identity) make you more likely to leave your suit in the sand at the nude beach?
 
I get the comment about no tan lines, but I’m wondering, for the more shy among us—would wearing a face mask (and therefore concealing your identity) make you more likely to leave your suit in the sand at the nude beach?

If you go to a nude beach there is no need to conceal your identity. You would be the strange one if you are wearing a custom, while nobody would give you a second look if nude. lol

I only do topless and still feel like an outsider most of the time. :D
 
If you go to a nude beach there is no need to conceal your identity. You would be the strange one if you are wearing a custom, while nobody would give you a second look if nude. lol

I only do topless and still feel like an outsider most of the time. :D

It’s because nobody would give me a second look that I’d want to conceal my face! :p
 
I get the comment about no tan lines, but I’m wondering, for the more shy among us—would wearing a face mask (and therefore concealing your identity) make you more likely to leave your suit in the sand at the nude beach?

Nope because I could still see them staring at me and I'm pretty sure that even my eyes would be blushing.
 
Well, you could always use your hot words. :D

True, but with a mask over my face nobody would know who said those words. It would turn into a Cyrano de Bergerac situation. My Hot Words would get her all riled up and then she would think it was the better looking guy next to me. Hahaha!
 
True, but with a mask over my face nobody would know who said those words. It would turn into a Cyrano de Bergerac situation. My Hot Words would get her all riled up and then she would think it was the better looking guy next to me. Hahaha!

OMG! I can't believe you mentioned Cyrano. I love that play since I was a teen. It's a bit like Lit. :D
 
Aren't there showers at the beach?

It depends which beach you visit. But from the showers to my car, you know what there is? Sand! To then stick to my wet body. I went for a walk on the beach a few weeks back. But the last two times I’ve swam in the ocean I simply rented a hotel there so I could properly clean off afterwards.
 
ok, now i need me some beach time. countdown is on. two weeks to pb beach. laissez les bons temps rouler. or whatever.
 
Back
Top