IhateClowns
Censored
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2010
- Posts
- 25,386
As I hopped out of the shower this morning I let out a loud gasp. My penis looked like the head of a turtle coming out of a front yard house shrub. Granted it was cold out and I am as defined by my wife, a grower not a shower, but that is besides the point.
I looked in the mirror and I looked like I had a Brillo pad in a leg lock. My pelvic region would make an 80's porn star blush. Droplets of shower water was glistening like morning dew on a blade of grass.
I made a decision right then and there that something needed to be done, but what exactly. That is where I need your input.
How do you ladies like your man's grooming below the Mason Dixon line?
I could simply ask my wife, but I thought I would ask the Dr. Phyllis experts who live on here. Who can pass up free advice???
Now let me preface by saying that I have a trimmer, razor blade, weed wacker, duct tape, hedge clippers, toe nail clippers, black head remover, needle nose pliers, a machete, flame thrower and tweezers. Am I missing any essential tools necessary to complete the job?
Do I just let it grow and see if I can pass Epstein from Welcome back Kotter? Do I trim it and leave a 5 O'clock George Michael shadow? Do I do a full on Bull from Night Court look? I am really torn.
If I let it continue to grow out I am concerned about hearing ZZ Top playing quietly between my thighs late at night. If I trim it up, I will have to use the same guard that I use on the head above my shoulders. That doesn't sit all that well with me. Finally if I shave it completely, that means I will have to maintain it more consistently, which will be difficult for me as I am very lazy. Plus the idea of my pubic region looking like a 16 year old's face 2 days after he ate greasy pizza is disturbing.
I clearly need some advice here.
I looked in the mirror and I looked like I had a Brillo pad in a leg lock. My pelvic region would make an 80's porn star blush. Droplets of shower water was glistening like morning dew on a blade of grass.
I made a decision right then and there that something needed to be done, but what exactly. That is where I need your input.
How do you ladies like your man's grooming below the Mason Dixon line?
I could simply ask my wife, but I thought I would ask the Dr. Phyllis experts who live on here. Who can pass up free advice???
Now let me preface by saying that I have a trimmer, razor blade, weed wacker, duct tape, hedge clippers, toe nail clippers, black head remover, needle nose pliers, a machete, flame thrower and tweezers. Am I missing any essential tools necessary to complete the job?
Do I just let it grow and see if I can pass Epstein from Welcome back Kotter? Do I trim it and leave a 5 O'clock George Michael shadow? Do I do a full on Bull from Night Court look? I am really torn.
If I let it continue to grow out I am concerned about hearing ZZ Top playing quietly between my thighs late at night. If I trim it up, I will have to use the same guard that I use on the head above my shoulders. That doesn't sit all that well with me. Finally if I shave it completely, that means I will have to maintain it more consistently, which will be difficult for me as I am very lazy. Plus the idea of my pubic region looking like a 16 year old's face 2 days after he ate greasy pizza is disturbing.
I clearly need some advice here.