Bad Random Life Tips.

[mynameisben]

If your local public toilet has a coin operated pay mechanism on the stall door, just slide on in underneath the 2-foot gap at the bottom of the door. Sure, you're likely to get piss and floor cleaner all over your clothes. But, hey! You just saved a quarter!

 

[phil_o]

Save the cost of a jacuzzi bath, just bathe with a hair drier in the bath.

 

[kurrginatorX]

Use a yolk separate to separate egg yolks from egg whites. Discard those nasty whites and cook up those delicious yolks any way you please. Cholesterol? Nah, just good, yummy goodness.

 

[Jada59]

Be a Mime! People love them!

 

[kurrginatorX]

Remember, the prefrontal lobe has the sweetest, most tender meat the brain has to offer.

 

[Jada59]

Put Vaseline or butter on your kitchen floor to give it a really nice sheen.

 

[kurrginatorX]

It is possible to sharpen your knives as you juggle them.

 

[Jada59]

Impress your dinner gusts by playing Fruit Ninja for real!

 

[kurrginatorX]

The need for sleep is an archaic notion.

 

[Jada59]

Save money and kill two birds with one stone. Shower with your clothes on!

 

[kurrginatorX]

Bedbugs are just loyal pets whose bites are them marking ownership of you.

 

[mynameisben]

Put sugar in your gas tank for that sweet, sweet ride.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If someone in your house is possessed by demons and you don’t know how to perform an exorcism, just boil some holy water. The steam will fry the demon out of them.

 

[kurrginatorX]

Put sugar in your gas tank for that sweet, sweet ride.

Frickin' Hilarious!!!

When called for jury duty, remind the lawyers that you are an honest, card-carrying member of the Nazi party who can be trusted.

 

[flirt_forever]

Out of almond milk? Simply mix a splash of cyanide into your regular milk to impress colleagues and dinner guests alike!

 

[fakingadulthood]

Money works with Highlander rules. If you’re broke, just behead the right person and you get their money!

 

[Misshotndeep]

For the guys: first time you and your date make out you should just whip out your dick and expect her to suck you off. Cuz that is so normal.

 

[fakingadulthood]

For the guys: first time you and your date make out you should just whip out your dick and expect her to suck you off. Cuz that is so normal.

For guys: keep this shit up so I constantly feel the need to apologize for my gender.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Start jerking off in the middle of the gym to prove you have a lot of testosterone.

 

[kurrginatorX]

Ladies, continue to fake those orgasms instead of giving constructive feedback. Women really can't cum anyway, right?

 

[mnbreastluver]

Fill your bed with crumbs to have a handy back scratcher ready to go.

 

[kurrginatorX]

Science Fair Project: How much must I masturbate onto this six by six piece of velvet cloth before it can stand on its own?

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you don’t want to get pregnant from unprotected sex, get pregnant first then have all the unprotected sex you want.

 

[kurrginatorX]

Remember, "Homeless" is just another word for "Free experiment fodder for evil scientists."

 

[mnbreastluver]

Rob yourself for free money.