Damn, she Justa did it again. Still nothing to see.

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Well, let me just say - that is impressive. (Takes notes of proportion for his life sized JustaSexRobot (patent pending).

Yes, watermelon is messy (boobs can be messy) and hard to work with (boobs can be hard to work with - and makes a good pun). Watermelon can be chilled (yep, boobs can be chilled). Watermelon can be found at any grocery market (yep, boobs can be found there too). Hmmm. This was far closer than I thought. But in the end it's boobs for the win. (Yes, you could have sex with a watermelon, but uh, that would be weird. No wait, sex with boobs can get weird too.)

Watermelons won't stab you in your sleep if you piss them off. That's a plus.

Still, I will have to go with boobs.

and another who doubted my tits.

in all fairness, while this is a 12 inch beach ball (pretty standard), I think they measured it similar to guys telling me they have a 12 inch dick. I'll measure it when I get home, but it seems more like a 10i inch diameter to me. maybe I just didn't blow hard enough.

and I worry about a world with more than one of me, even if robotic. It might create some sort of imbalance or paradox with completely unknown repercussions.

haha, there are a lot of similarities. and now you so know I will be googling men screwing watermelons, thanks for that. there goes anything productive I had planned

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I'll never bet against your tits again. I may beat off against them but never bet against.

haha, that is obviously the smarter thing to do

I would be in a lot of trouble. I’d definitely require scheduled bathroom breaks and I’d desperately need to keep hydrated even though it’s an office...

haha. you would probably also ditch the tucked in shirt look, but then it would be less fun for me,

 

[Youneverknow81]

haha, that is obviously the smarter thing to do



haha. you would probably also ditch the tucked in shirt look, but then it would be less fun for me,

It depends on if HR knows what’s happening? I suppose I could just tell you if they weren’t. Productivity would hit a snag for sure.

 

[Paul_Chance]

I'm sure a double of you, even a robotic one, would violate some hidden law of the cosmos and unleash torrents of chaos. Cats and Dogs sleeping together!

I've joked I would like to have a robot double, but I am pretty sure it would take a look at my work schedule and say "fuck that" and take all my vacation time and my credit card, so I have to say no there.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

ok, may I just say google search of watermelon fucking did not disappoint. Man, how did I grow up without the internet.

ok first there is a freakishly large amount of porn dedicated to this. how did I make it to 40 and not know this was an actual thing? who is the market for such porn? Is there like a fruit fetish? will I find fruit gang bangs (yeah so on the to google list later)

but then I found a reddit community. Oh reddit, I really need to spend more time there. So the situation starts with weird reddit guys fucking coconuts. now some turn out ok for the um coconutters, but of course there is the guy who learns he is allergic to coconuts with some swelling, and I guy who learned his girlfriend was allergic to coconut as she was giving a blow job. and a few others.

So anyway of course someone reading the coconutters makes the "what's next, a watermelon" comment, which of course means some dude goes "watch this, hold my beer". and again apparently it was really enjoyable until he decided to see whether his erect dick could hold the weight of a watermelon. Alas, it could not. and it lands on his foot, so he goes to the ER.

In the end just a broken toe, and I am sure none of this is true, but either way, my twisted self is laughing my ass off and yeah, the internet did not disappoint. hopefully fruit gang bang also leaves me laughing so hard that I can't stop

 

[Youneverknow81]

ok, may I just say google search of watermelon fucking did not disappoint. Man, how did I grow up without the internet.

ok first there is a freakishly large amount of porn dedicated to this. how did I make it to 40 and not know this was an actual thing? who is the market for such porn? Is there like a fruit fetish? will I find fruit gang bangs (yeah so on the to google list later)

but then I found a reddit community. Oh reddit, I really need to spend more time there. So the situation starts with weird reddit guys fucking coconuts. now some turn out ok for the um coconutters, but of course there is the guy who learns he is allergic to coconuts with some swelling, and I guy who learned his girlfriend was allergic to coconut as she was giving a blow job. and a few others.

So anyway of course someone reading the coconutters makes the "what's next, a watermelon" comment, which of course means some dude goes "watch this, hold my beer". and again apparently it was really enjoyable until he decided to see whether his erect dick could hold the weight of a watermelon. Alas, it could not. and it lands on his foot, so he goes to the ER.

In the end just a broken toe, and I am sure none of this is true, but either way, my twisted self is laughing my ass off and yeah, the internet did not disappoint. hopefully fruit gang bang also leaves me laughing so hard that I can't stop

Haha, that cock muscle feels strong when cumming but it doesn’t have the endurance to hold a watermelon, rookie mistake!

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

It depends on if HR knows what’s happening? I suppose I could just tell you if they weren’t. Productivity would hit a snag for sure.

well, I generally find it best to include HR in any debauchery I have planned. They don't complain when they are active participants.

I'm sure a double of you, even a robotic one, would violate some hidden law of the cosmos and unleash torrents of chaos. Cats and Dogs sleeping together!

I've joked I would like to have a robot double, but I am pretty sure it would take a look at my work schedule and say "fuck that" and take all my vacation time and my credit card, so I have to say no there.

exactly. the world can only handle so much of my chaos.

haha. yeah, I don't want a robot double, I'd want my robot to like listen better and be somewhat controllable.

 

[Youneverknow81]

well, I generally find it best to include HR in any debauchery I have planned. They don't complain when they are active participants.



exactly. the world can only handle so much of my chaos.

haha. yeah, I don't want a robot double, I'd want my robot to like listen better and be somewhat controllable.

Haha I could see you walking into their office, skirt on, telling them you plan on taking over the office with arousal, sitting on their desk, asking them if that was going to be a problem. Stunned they don’t answer, you leave and they notice you left them a wet spot in their desk

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Haha, that cock muscle feels strong when cumming but it doesn’t have the endurance to hold a watermelon, rookie mistake!

so you know this from experience. what exactly does it have the endurance to hold then?

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Haha I could see you walking into their office, skirt on, telling them you plan on taking over the office with arousal, sitting on their desk, asking them if that was going to be a problem. Stunned they don’t answer, you leave and they notice you left them a wet spot in their desk

Well that is usually not how my HR antics work. But I had the female HR rep (when we had one) catcalling the guys with us. Asked my current HR guy if my thongs and low riding pants violate our no ass crack policy and showed him (his ruling is as long as no one complains than it doesn't)

See, instead of your idea, really I'd just find one with a sense of humor. I am really not erotic, just twisted. well I mean there was that HR VP I was screwing, but yeah he was twisted too so ya know.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

anyway, last item on justa's tits so far today. which is bigger, justa's tits or justa's middle finger?

 

[kdunn762012]

If symbolism is factored into the equation I imagine your middle finger may give your melons a run for their money lol

 

[Paul_Chance]

I didn't google watermelon porn, LOL, but I am not surprised it is there. I once had a threesome with a watermelon. Well, technically a foursome if you counted the watermelon. It was pretty damn sticky by the end of it.

Here is the simple "guy truth". Whatever it is, if you can figure out a way to stick your dick in it, someone somewhere has already done it, video taped it, and posted it to the internet.

 

[mobleedzblue]

anyway, last item on justa's tits so far today. which is bigger, justa's tits or justa's middle finger?

Now that's a trick question........but it's still your tits! I learned my lesson setting against them and I cant stop thinking of beating off against them.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

If symbolism is factored into the equation I imagine your middle finger may give your melons a run for their money lol

well that is a valid point

I didn't google watermelon porn, LOL, but I am not surprised it is there. I once has a threesome with a watermelon. Well, technically a foursome if you counted the watermelon. It was pretty damn sticky by the end of it.

Here is the simple "guy truth". Whatever it is, if you can figure out a way to stick your dick in it, someone somewhere has already done it, video taped it, and posted it to the internet.

haha, counting the watermelon. and now I really kind of want to hear this story, like what was the gender of all those involved and just so many questions

well maybe I will find the video on my fruit gang bang search later on.

but yeah, I seriously am always amazed. Every bizarre word combination I put together with penis or fucking, it really does exist. Like of course, I watched American Pie, but I guess me being all naive assumed it was simply comedy.

Well, I guess one should never question the creativity or ingenuity young men have in relation to their dicks. I for one am glad the internet is around to broadcast it. I am seriously still laughing at the coconutters.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Now that's a trick question........but it's still your tits! I learned my lesson setting against them and I cant stop thinking of beating off against them.

that is probably the smart answer.

well other that I am amazed that some of you guys are still able to think about anything I post erotically today.

 

[mobleedzblue]

that is probably the smart answer.

well other that I am amazed that some of you guys are still able to think about anything I post erotically today.

I'm just mesmerized by your body baby!

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I'm just mesmerized by your body baby!

so is it an impressive ability to tune me out, or are you just somewhat twisted too?

 

[mobleedzblue]

so is it an impressive ability to tune me out, or are you just somewhat twisted too?

Oh I'm just as twisted baby

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Oh I'm just as twisted baby

Well good. that is just way more interesting.

 

[mobleedzblue]

Well good. that is just way more interesting.

One of the many reasons I am drawn to you.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

One of the many reasons I am drawn to you.

Aw thanks, I love it when people notice my twisted personality.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

well as it turns out my tits are indeed bigger than my middle finger

http://i.imgur.com/fcZYCIjl.jpg

Yeah, that is just for those guys who walk around bitching about beach ball tits, damn it. because apparently it is not confirmed I have beach ball tits. Though maybe I am excluded because I only have beach balls strapped to my chest in a bra, otherwise they are more beach balls on my abdomen. or there is the whole cone torpedo titty bras instead....does that change anything, are big torpedo tits more appropriate? And yeah, the guys who walk around here bitching about the body types of the ampic posters in general can suck my middle too. My god, you could just not look rather than look and whine. Generally, whining about what you are seeing stops at about 2 years old, when you learn to change what you are looking at. It is super simple. Look, if you need help learning how to use the internet, just ask a 5 year old. They can help you, and maybe even give you a sticker if you manage to excel at it. I can assure people that me being a kind of slutty bitch has nothing to do with my breast growth, because there would be a lot more really big tits walking around. just saying.

And thank you guys who hung out for the laughs. I had fun. I am out of pictures, just could not get the cat to sleep in my bra. Oh, and a special thanks to the fruit fuckers out there, the reddit stories just made my day. I am still laughing.

and yeah, you know I am still going to be on reddit doing fuck all the rest of the day, well except sitting in my cube laughing like a hyena

 

[ratherabsurd1]

well as it turns out my tits are indeed bigger than my middle finger


You are too funny

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

You are too funny

well thanks, I am still giving a large amount of credit to the coconutters for my laughs today.

But eh, either way, I like being silly, I love to laugh, this week is a pretty serious one at work, so I am glad to be able to not take things seriously.