Women hating all men?

[Jada59]

This story goes back in time to the days of ICQ. Is that even still around? Use to be an instant messaging system.

I had a male friend who lived in another state. I think he wanted to be more than just friends but that's neither here nor there. He was trying to help me with one of the novels I had written. He sent me a message asking me to call him on the phone.

I had gone upstairs to do something and while I was there, my then husband saw the message, replied that I would call, then shut the computer off.

I didn't discover the message until about two weeks later. Was beginning to get concerned that maybe my friend was sick or something as I hadn't heard from him.

You can imagine how ticked off I was at my husband when I discovered what he had done. I immediately called my friend to apologize.

His response? "I'm surprised you're still talking to me!"

I was like...huh? "Why? I'm not angry with you. You did nothing wrong. It's my husband who was the asshole."

He then responded that it was because he was a man. And when women get angry at one man, they get angry at ALL men.

I found this hard to believe until I started asking around.

I asked my mom and a few female friends and they said that indeed when they got angry with one man, they were angry at all of them. This is something I just do not get. All of the people I asked are also man haters. I can't fathom this either.

Now maybe I'm just the odd one out. I love men. I mean...LOVE them! I don't know why but I have always been far more comfortable around men than I am women in general. And although I really do hate to generalize, it seems to me that there are a heck of a lot of women out there who are catty and like to play games. I know some men can be this way too but it seems that there are more women than men who act this way.

I don't mean to be putting women down. I do have women friends. But I never really have a craving to be around other women like I know some women do. I know people who are into "girl's night out" and to me that would be boring. I actually do crave men. Just being around them. Not necessarily in a sexual way. I just enjoy them. My mom tells me that I have always been this way.

Anyway... I guess I am asking if others here have noticed this thing about women hating all men just because they hate or are angry at one man?

Thanks!

 

[adrina]

Honestly? Men saying that is a cop out. Like men who fall back on women being mysterious and not able to be understood.

It's relying on stereotypes instead of thinking in terms of logic and humanity.

 

[Jada59]

Honestly? Men saying that is a cop out. Like men who fall back on women being mysterious and not able to be understood.

It's relying on stereotypes instead of thinking in terms of logic and humanity.

It wasn't men saying it except for my one male friend. After he said it, I asked several women. They all said they thought that way. I couldn't believe it!

 

[Wrong Element]

Anyway... I guess I am asking if others here have noticed this thing about women hating all men just because they hate or are angry at one man?

If this were true, we'd never get laid.

 

[Jada59]

If this were true, we'd never get laid.

I don't know about that. Some of these women do still have sex, even though they don't like it or don't like the men they are with.

 

[RoryN]

I don't know about that. Some of these women do still have sex, even though they don't like it or don't like the men they are with.

These women you speak of sound like they might have problems.

So, I would not take their view of men as being "normal".

 

[Jada59]

These women you speak of sound like they might have problems.

So, I would not take their view of men as being "normal".

Thanks! I gave up asking the people I know because they all said the same thing.

 

[MelissaBaby]

Anyway... I guess I am asking if others here have noticed this thing about women hating all men just because they hate or are angry at one man?

Thanks!

I've heard women say it as an expression of exasperation,particularly when men stick up for other men's bad behavior.

But, every woman I met in prison would tell you they were there because of a man, and I never heard a single one say, seriously, that they hated all men. If it's not true there, I doubt it's true anywhere.

 

[Radiohead]

If this were true, we'd never get laid.

Speak for yourself.

Manhater!

 

[Radiohead]

It wasn't men saying it except for my one male friend. After he said it, I asked several women. They all said they thought that way. I couldn't believe it!

Scared people generalise.

Look at me!

If your first relationship is a bad relationship, you mistrust relationships, and the other party in them.

If your third or fourth is, its not the the person, and all that they represent, for you have other examples.

Tis basic, but understandable.

 

[Captainnumnuts]

I'm guessing this was a one time incident many years ago and for some reason is still important as to include all women and all men?

 

[Noor]

Sheesh if I hate all men because of the actions of one, it would be endless.
Almost half the world is men, and more than likely one of them will do something unpleasant fairly frequently.

Many ICQ men are old nerds, who don't really get "females."

Don't generalize. People are individuals, more than their accidents of birth.
There are unpleasant people in both sexes.
You may not have meant to generalize and/or put women down, but you did.
Please stop this now.

Girls night out is popular with a subset of society, just as drinking with the boys is, most women don't live in that world because they are either uninterested, too busy or can't afford to.
Most of my friends are guys too, but a fair number are women.
I work in tech, I have lots of friends who are musicians, unfortunately both of those areas are still largely male dominated.
I grew up with numerous brothers so guys don't scare me or cause me to act differently just because they are male.

 

[LJ_Reloaded]

Well that's the first time someone didn't catch a major beatdown for saying "not all men are like that."

*dives behind cover*

 

[greengamegirl]

Categories

People love to put things in categories and predict how those categories behave. It makes sense in an experiment. You have a theory. If enough people test that theory and get the same result, it must be true right? But how much have to get the same result? Just one other person is enough for some people. Others need 100 or the majority of their sample group. Others need all of their friends to agree. It’s a bit silly when you think about it.

If I have a bad experience with a man. I can find one other person who had a bad experience to then say, all men give women bad experiences. Or I can find 50 or make friends with people who have only had bad experiences with men. If I find even one who has not had a bad experience, I could just ignore that person. But that would be nonsense.

Usually, when there is a blanket statement about people, there is a low level of thinking involved. It’s just laziness.

 

[Jada59]

People love to put things in categories and predict how those categories behave. It makes sense in an experiment. You have a theory. If enough people test that theory and get the same result, it must be true right? But how much have to get the same result? Just one other person is enough for some people. Others need 100 or the majority of their sample group. Others need all of their friends to agree. It’s a bit silly when you think about it.

If I have a bad experience with a man. I can find one other person who had a bad experience to then say, all men give women bad experiences. Or I can find 50 or make friends with people who have only had bad experiences with men. If I find even one who has not had a bad experience, I could just ignore that person. But that would be nonsense.

Usually, when there is a blanket statement about people, there is a low level of thinking involved. It’s just laziness.

That could be! I am recently divorced. A woman gave me a magnet to put on my car that said something to the effect of... The more men I meet, the more I love my cats. I refused to put it on my car. I did not think it was funny or true. Would you believe that not only that woman but two others were offended that I wouldn't take the magnet? And when I told some others of it, they said they wanted one!

I happen to like people in general but I especially like men. Not really sure why. I have just always been drawn to men. I do like animals as well but in reality, people are animals too. Bah!

I also tend to think of these women as grumpy. Although one is a young adult and never had a date, much less a BF, the rest all seem to have a hatred for men. One constantly complains about her husband, the other constantly complains about her BF and the others are divorced and won't so much as ever go on a date again because they flat out dislike men.

Yeah, my ex husband turned out to be a bad person, and not just to me but to the world, as did the ex husbands of these other women. But... I have a lot of male friends and I dated men prior. None of them were bad people although in some cases there was enough of a personality difference that it didn't make for a satisfying romance for me. Doesn't mean that I hate them though. I always wish them well. Even my ex. I just don't wish him on another woman. Hehehe. But who knows? There could be some woman out there that he is a perfect fit for. You just never know.

 

[thespiceoflife]

That could be! I am recently divorced. A woman gave me a magnet to put on my car that said something to the effect of... The more men I meet, the more I love my cats. I refused to put it on my car. I did not think it was funny or true. Would you believe that not only that woman but two others were offended that I wouldn't take the magnet? And when I told some others of it, they said they wanted one!

I happen to like people in general but I especially like men. Not really sure why. I have just always been drawn to men. I do like animals as well but in reality, people are animals too. Bah!

I also tend to think of these women as grumpy. Although one is a young adult and never had a date, much less a BF, the rest all seem to have a hatred for men. One constantly complains about her husband, the other constantly complains about her BF and the others are divorced and won't so much as ever go on a date again because they flat out dislike men.

Yeah, my ex husband turned out to be a bad person, and not just to me but to the world, as did the ex husbands of these other women. But... I have a lot of male friends and I dated men prior. None of them were bad people although in some cases there was enough of a personality difference that it didn't make for a satisfying romance for me. Doesn't mean that I hate them though. I always wish them well. Even my ex. I just don't wish him on another woman. Hehehe. But who knows? There could be some woman out there that he is a perfect fit for. You just never know.

I appreciate your balanced view of the world. I would guess you are a lot happier person than most of the women you describe. Keep on loving. x

 

[hadruprider]

Jada, there was an example of what you are talking about recently on the personals board here. She had a bad experience with one guy, then described him as a monster, and then said this was the norm here!
Later she calmed down and apologised, and then deleted all her comments and her lit account, but you can still see her comments where people quoted them.

 

[SalviaDivinorum]

It wasn't men saying it except for my one male friend. After he said it, I asked several women. They all said they thought that way. I couldn't believe it!

Then this thread should be encouraging to you, since none of the women who have commented think that way.

 

[Jada59]

Then this thread should be encouraging to you, since none of the women who have commented think that way.

Yes it is.

 

[EternalFantasies]

I think one of you needs to show the other one whose orange is more black.


: popcorntime:

 

[knowhow7890]

Interesting topic. I always feel these sorts of observations are just evidence again that a lot of people find it easier to generalise and group people (and things) together. We see it very prominently in the world today. It's easier to follow a single thought process or sentiment that is well publicised (often someone else's), than it is to independently think for yourself and come up with a thought process (or judgement) based on facts.

Unfortunately there are some odd characters around us (usually male), ans so sometimes we (hopefully less odd characters) get labelled as the same as them.

Quite deep for me on here, I usually try to keep it simple...anyway, back to looking at breasts.

 

[dawghoused]

Women Hating All Men.

I think your friend had some bad experience with some women who hate men.