How to Get Over A Chat Friend

[DiscoveringRomance]

Just wait, time heals all wounds....it has for me..sometimes it helps to take a step back and see the real picture...you can lose yourself if you're not careful.

 

[DiscoveringRomance]

It seems to me you have to talk to him and tell him what you feel, I have had similar experiences with chat friends that basically disappeared and there was no closure, that is bad also.

Yes, there should be closure, I agree. Even if it is to take a break, say good-bye, or remain friends. Thank you for your feedback.

 

[pumperguy191]

Unfortunately, it happens far too often on here. There is no easy way. Usually, one or the other just stops responding. It know that sounds harsh but it usually works out best. This just happened to me and probably is going to happen a second time real soon. Sorry that it happened.

 

[PuckIt]

Ow. Not an easy one.

The thing is, whether it is on chat through an electronic media or face to face in real life, the act of opening yourself up and sharing the inner you sans masks is a hefty emotional investment. Many will think it isn't, or shouldn't be, if it's through electronic chat, but the sad fact is that what brings about the emotional investment is just how much you shared of your inner, secret self that you don't habitually.

And the longer the relationship goes on, the more heavily invested one or the other, or both, will become.

Something to keep in mind is that in the virtual world of electronic chat, interacting with words on a screen, there are no non-verbal cues to pick up the way we do in RL face to face interactions and it's really easy to slide over a precipice and reveal more than you would have if you'd been able to see their facial expressions and body language.

I'm not about to tell you which is right and which is wrong. Just that some people become emotionally invested while others... not so much.

I'm also not going to tell you whether you should slip silently away into the night or electronically "Dear John" him.

What is most important is that you remain yourself and not give someone else more power over your behavior than they deserve. That means continuing to wear your electronic heart on your sleeve if that's you. And it means determining for yourself how you would best be able to face your mirror next week in "letting him go." (Which you MAY be doing if you are stressing over the "proper way to say goodbye".)

Either way, just recognize that what you think and feel, and your instincts are every bit as viable and important as anyone else.

 

[DiscoveringRomance]

Unfortunately, it happens far too often on here. There is no easy way. Usually, one or the other just stops responding. It know that sounds harsh but it usually works out best. This just happened to me and probably is going to happen a second time real soon. Sorry that it happened.

Thank you!

Ow. Not an easy one.

The thing is, whether it is on chat through an electronic media or face to face in real life, the act of opening yourself up and sharing the inner you sans masks is a hefty emotional investment. Many will think it isn't, or shouldn't be, if it's through electronic chat, but the sad fact is that what brings about the emotional investment is just how much you shared of your inner, secret self that you don't habitually.



What is most important is that you remain yourself and not give someone else more power over your behavior than they deserve. That means continuing to wear your electronic heart on your sleeve if that's you. And it means determining for yourself how you would best be able to face your mirror next week in "letting him go." (Which you MAY be doing if you are stressing over the "proper way to say goodbye".)

Either way, just recognize that what you think and feel, and your instincts are every bit as viable and important as anyone else.

Thank you for the good advice. Following your instincts and not your heart is good advice. Watch out for those red flags. I just need to do what's right...not dwell on the past, but look ahead and do the right thing. Be myself at the same time.

Thank you! This was for a past relationship, and I think I did the right thing.

 

[Dribble]

...and there are many people that don't think one can fall in love in an online relationship...How would you deal with a relationship in the real world? That is how I suggest you deal with it here as well. Be yourself.

 

[LanguageOfLove]

How about giving some space between the two of you. Sometimes people need a break and come back with a fresh start.

 

[DiscoveringRomance]

How about giving some space between the two of you. Sometimes people need a break and come back with a fresh start.

Time is good for all healing. Time heals all wounds, right?