I'm naked, he's not

[BrightShinyGirl]

One thing I find hot is the idea of being completely naked in front of a man who's fully dressed, especially if he's dressed nicely in a business suit or even black tie. I'm not talking about being naked in front of a bunch of strangers, or exposing myself in public. I just mean privately, one-on-one, just him and me.

I love the power differential -- the notion that he's so refined and in control while my sexuality is so blatantly on display. I particularly like the idea that maybe I start out in conservative business clothes as well, and then strip for him, slowly revealing my naked body. Then I touch myself while he watches, playing with my exposed breasts, openly fingering my pussy right in front of him. Maybe even I make myself come. And the whole time he stays perfectly calm and completely clothed.

I've done this a few times with my husband, but usually once things get going, he wants to join in, which changes the dynamic. Do any other women have this particular fantasy or fetish? I guess it falls under the category of CMNF, but it's more specific than just getting naked in front of some guys. And it's not like he's dominating me and making me perform for him. I'm the one who's initiating everything. It's about exposing myself and being very sexual in front of a man who isn't revealing his own sensual side at all. He's definitely interested in me, but he's very tightly in control of himself, while I'm a horny mess. It's that contrast between his civilized behavior and my animalistic rutting that I find so arousing.

 

[Graf_Severin]

I know you're asking women if they share your fantasy, but I think you just created mine. Well said.

 

[soccermomnympho]

One thing I find hot is the idea of being completely naked in front of a man who's fully dressed, especially if he's dressed nicely in a business suit or even black tie. I'm not talking about being naked in front of a bunch of strangers, or exposing myself in public. I just mean privately, one-on-one, just him and me.

I love the power differential -- the notion that he's so refined and in control while my sexuality is so blatantly on display. I particularly like the idea that maybe I start out in conservative business clothes as well, and then strip for him, slowly revealing my naked body. Then I touch myself while he watches, playing with my exposed breasts, openly fingering my pussy right in front of him. Maybe even I make myself come. And the whole time he stays perfectly calm and completely clothed.

I've done this a few times with my husband, but usually once things get going, he wants to join in, which changes the dynamic. Do any other women have this particular fantasy or fetish? I guess it falls under the category of CMNF, but it's more specific than just getting naked in front of some guys. And it's not like he's dominating me and making me perform for him. I'm the one who's initiating everything. It's about exposing myself and being very sexual in front of a man who isn't revealing his own sensual side at all. He's definitely interested in me, but he's very tightly in control of himself, while I'm a horny mess. It's that contrast between his civilized behavior and my animalistic rutting that I find so arousing.

I certainly agree. I dated a guy a while ago who loved this. It turned me on to see him get hard in his suit pants while I was vulnerable in front of him and I know he loved me in that situation

 

[EctoJohn]

I rather like the inverse, especially if she took the clothes off me herself and didn't give me the choice.
I like the idea I didn't see it coming, and things go from casual to her almost mocking me with her smile as I lose my clothing to her.

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

I certainly agree. I dated a guy a while ago who loved this. It turned me on to see him get hard in his suit pants while I was vulnerable in front of him and I know he loved me in that situation

Yes! A visible erection showing in his trousers is definitely part of it! He should be very interested in what I'm doing, just holding himself aloof.

 

[soccermomnympho]

Yes! A visible erection showing in his trousers is definitely part of it! He should be very interested in what I'm doing, just holding himself aloof.

Oh yes exactly. He loved to spank me over his knee while fully clothed. I enjoyed feeling him grow under me.

 

[sarobah]

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[cosmic_peach]

My apologies in advance, I am male and you are asking for female feedback. However your description perfectly describes like behavior my current lover exhibits with me and she provides very similar reasoning when asked. This is absolutely one of her favorite turn-ons. Therefore, I do think other women share that "fetish" is the point of my post for you.

 

[sarobah]

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[happyamy]

"He's definitely interested in me, but he's very tightly in control of himself, while I'm a horny mess. It's that contrast between his civilized behavior and my animalistic rutting that I find so arousing."

I agree with this. I'm always trying to get them to lose control and give in to their desire for me. I don't have this particular fantasy, but I have been the sole naked person in a room of clothed men a few times and it was deeply and powerfully arousing to me.

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

There is also that power differential. To be naked and exposed when your partner is fully clothed has potent symbolism. I have a rather assertive personality; and Rob and I have jobs in the same workplace. Mine is the superior position, as technically his boss. This doesn’t bother him, but when we come home in the evening and I take off all my clothes and stand before him, I am letting him know that he is unquestionably the man of the house. That is an empowering experience for both of us.

I really love what you're saying here. I also have a job where I'm always supposed to be the one in charge, the one who always keeps everything under control. So it's really thrilling sometimes to shed that role and all my responsibilities and just enjoy the raw physicality of being a woman. You say "I take off all my clothes and stand before him" -- yes! It's having him see my nakedness that's important. I love the look in his eyes when I expose myself to him, and the feeling that it gives me of being vulnerable and wanted and protected.

 

[tw63]

Oh yes exactly. He loved to spank me over his knee while fully clothed. I enjoyed feeling him grow under me.

That's not just "hot", its down right on fire! WOW.

 

[coati]

This is a thought-provoking thread. I love it when women are open and honest about their sexuality, and this anonymous setting provides a great platform for expression.

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

I wonder if this is related to the fact that generally speaking (and this IS a generalization) males are more aroused by visual sexual stimuli than women. Also, we females are used to showing more skin with our clothing, and in the media we are all exposed to vastly more female than male flesh. So, given that familiarity breeds complacency, I wonder if a man being naked with a clothed woman is a more intense experience than vice versa.

Yes. We're just expected to show more of our bodies. Look at women's evening gowns vs. men's tuxedos. Or business attire. I regularly wear skirts that show my bare legs at the office, but my male coworkers never wear shorts.

So, yeah, it makes sense that CFNM is a bigger deal. We're so used to seeing women exposed and men covered up that switching the power relationship feels very kinky. Whereas CMNF is just an exaggerated version of the status quo.

When I wrote the OP it felt weird to even call it a fetish. Undressing so that a man can look at you is just a normal thing that most women learn to do. That doesn't mean that we're all strippers or that we want to be ogled by random guys on the street. It just means that being naked in front of a man who is fully clothed can sometimes feel very familiar and comfortable and safe.

And it also feels a bit like you're dropping some the pretense that normally exists between men and women. We know you guys stare at our tits. Okay, then, here they are! Stare away! We know you're fantasizing about what we've got between our legs. Okay, then, here's my pussy! Look at it all you want! You can stop pretending that you're not looking at my body, and I can stop pretending that I don't want you to look.

 

[soccermomnympho]

That's not just "hot", its down right on fire! WOW.

Thank you

 

[sarobah]

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[Pink_Milkmaid]

Yes. We're just expected to show more of our bodies. Look at women's evening gowns vs. men's tuxedos. Or business attire. I regularly wear skirts that show my bare legs at the office, but my male coworkers never wear shorts.

So, yeah, it makes sense that CFNM is a bigger deal. We're so used to seeing women exposed and men covered up that switching the power relationship feels very kinky. Whereas CMNF is just an exaggerated version of the status quo.

When I wrote the OP it felt weird to even call it a fetish. Undressing so that a man can look at you is just a normal thing that most women learn to do. That doesn't mean that we're all strippers or that we want to be ogled by random guys on the street. It just means that being naked in front of a man who is fully clothed can sometimes feel very familiar and comfortable and safe.

And it also feels a bit like you're dropping some the pretense that normally exists between men and women. We know you guys stare at our tits. Okay, then, here they are! Stare away! We know you're fantasizing about what we've got between our legs. Okay, then, here's my pussy! Look at it all you want! You can stop pretending that you're not looking at my body, and I can stop pretending that I don't want you to look.

It might be an exaggerated version of the status quo, but it's a damn sexy dynamic, one that I like a lot. It's the power differential that does it for me. Oh and the suit porn is just a bonus if he's well dressed, but jeans can be sexy too if he knows how to hold himself.

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

I live in a sort of paradox. My workplace is a university department, in a traditionally masculine field, and when I started there it was a much stuffier place. As one of the youngest members of the academic staff and one of the few females, I took both pride and pleasure in showing lots of leg and other bare skin. The attention and approval has been empowering, and I take some credit for making the place a more relaxed environment. Even now, however, for the men clothing is a projection of social and professional status — so, for instance, the senior males wear coats and ties — while for us women it’s more an expression of our personality. So while at work I’m still a long way from nude, it would be naïve to deny that there’s an element of sexual display in what I wear (and don’t wear).

I know what you mean. I'm in public relations and I'm supposed to project both "professional" and "attractive" at the same time. It's a fine line to walk between showing too much skin (which means I'm not taken seriously) and showing too little (which means I'm not fashionable). I'm expected to look sexy and appealing, but in a very restrained and understated way.

At home, while being naked gives me a sense of control over my sexuality, it also invokes feelings of vulnerability and even embarrassment. And although my boyfriend and I both derive pleasure from the one-sided nudity, I am the one whose body is exposed for his visual pleasure. My arousal is of a passive form. I get pleasure from giving pleasure. In this sense his clothing represents dominance and my nudity represents submission.

I don't know if I could be naked all the time like that. (Well, I have kids, so that's makes the question moot anyway ... but assuming I didn't.) There's a part of me that finds the idea incredibly exciting -- always being on display like that -- but I'm not sure I'd be brave enough to keep it up day after day. Eventually I think my sense of modesty would get the better of me and I'd have to cover up.

Does that mean you're naked right now?

 

[lakesailer_mi]

I live in a sort of paradox. My workplace is a university department, in a traditionally masculine field, and when I started there it was a much stuffier place. As one of the youngest members of the academic staff and one of the few females, I took both pride and pleasure in showing lots of leg and other bare skin. The attention and approval has been empowering, and I take some credit for making the place a more relaxed environment. Even now, however, for the men clothing is a projection of social and professional status — so, for instance, the senior males wear coats and ties — while for us women it’s more an expression of our personality. So while at work I’m still a long way from nude, it would be naïve to deny that there’s an element of sexual display in what I wear (and don’t wear).

At home, while being naked gives me a sense of control over my sexuality, it also invokes feelings of vulnerability and even embarrassment. And although my boyfriend and I both derive pleasure from the one-sided nudity, I am the one whose body is exposed for his visual pleasure. My arousal is of a passive form. I get pleasure from giving pleasure. In this sense his clothing represents dominance and my nudity represents submission.

Of course, one-sided nudity can be a tool for dominance by the naked partner; but it would be interesting to see if there are any studies on the nature of this particular power exchange. (I have a theory, but it's probably controversial.)

Very interesting thoughts. I'm curious about the idea that one sided nudity can be a too for the dominance by the NAKED partner. I guess I've always thought of it as the other way around.

 

[sarobah]

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[sarobah]

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[lakesailer_mi]

This is way outside my field of expertise, but I imagine that it can be if one sees it entirely as projecting one’s sexuality. Certainly, a major part of the appeal of wearing a brief bikini or a short skirt is an assertion of feminine sexuality.

But I believe there is a difference between the sexes. A male, even when he’s naked in a one-sided situation *, has a power-projection advantage over a female in that position. To put it bluntly, the open display of a penis represents an explicit “threat” (in the context of our primal urges and fears), whereas exposure of the female anatomy is more an advertisement of accessibility.

To give two more trite examples. (1) Picture a naked man walking through a public place, and then a naked woman. Both are breaking the law, but which one will cause the bigger stir among passers-by? (2) Most beaches in my local area allow discrete female bottomless bathing (bare breasts being perfectly legal) but impose a much stricter ban on naked males. The official reason is that the male genitalia are far more overt. (That’s my word, not the official explanation. In fact, I was about to write “in your face”, but that might have created the wrong impression.)

* I’m referring to male-female relationships. It’s more complicated with a single-sex partnership, and since I am not an expert on any of this I shall limit my comments to to M-F context

Interesting. So, are you saying, though, that a naked male can be dominant over a fully clothed female, but not the other way around? (which, frankly, OK, I can see that). Still, interesting.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

One thing I find hot is the idea of being completely naked in front of a man who's fully dressed, especially if he's dressed nicely in a business suit or even black tie. I'm not talking about being naked in front of a bunch of strangers, or exposing myself in public. I just mean privately, one-on-one, just him and me.

I love the power differential -- the notion that he's so refined and in control while my sexuality is so blatantly on display. I particularly like the idea that maybe I start out in conservative business clothes as well, and then strip for him, slowly revealing my naked body. Then I touch myself while he watches, playing with my exposed breasts, openly fingering my pussy right in front of him. Maybe even I make myself come. And the whole time he stays perfectly calm and completely clothed.

I've done this a few times with my husband, but usually once things get going, he wants to join in, which changes the dynamic. Do any other women have this particular fantasy or fetish? I guess it falls under the category of CMNF, but it's more specific than just getting naked in front of some guys. And it's not like he's dominating me and making me perform for him. I'm the one who's initiating everything. It's about exposing myself and being very sexual in front of a man who isn't revealing his own sensual side at all. He's definitely interested in me, but he's very tightly in control of himself, while I'm a horny mess. It's that contrast between his civilized behavior and my animalistic rutting that I find so arousing.

And, I will say, this is very erotic. Beautiful ideas.

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

Which is something men don’t have to worry about. On the other hand, they wear the boring clothes.

LOL ... I know! They do get to pick what color tie they're going to wear ... .

At the moment I am fully clothed
I have on occasion gone an entire weekend au naturel… which unfortunately confines me to the home.
Rob and I don’t have kids, so we are free of that constraint; but I don’t want my nudity to become passé. The standing arrangement is also that it is always my idea. That actually makes it more exciting because I can surprise him. For instance, I have been working at home today, and when he comes home in about an hour… well, we’ll see

Okay, that makes more sense. I thought you were saying that you were always naked whenever you were home. That seemed like it would be incredibly challenging to pull off. But going naked for selective stretches is more workable. And I can see how that would actually be hotter.

Believe it or not, I am quite modest when it comes to revealing that final bit of me. I do enjoy the challenge of overcoming my reservations.

The power of the male gaze. I can drop my panties without a second thought if I'm alone, but if he's watching me do it, I suddenly become shy. It's weird. And the urge to cover yourself with your hands afterwards is very strong. Part of the thrill is pushing through it and giving in to being naked.

 

[sarobah]

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