The Official Author's Hangout 2016 April Fool's Day Contest Support Thread

[legerdemer]

Self flagellation: you're doing it wrong

I am a quick study and a compliant student.
There's a bit of boots and feet in the story...

 

[lovecraft68]

I am a quick study and a compliant student.
There's a bit of boots and feet in the story...

You know you have a foot fetish when...

People on the boards tell you when its in their stories and when the wife who is Florida visoting family sends severl pics of...

Her feet in the new sandals she bought down there

 

[J_R_Ashunwhy]

Omg. My votes have DOUBLED in one day.

From 4 to 8 lmao.

*slow clap*

 

[AMoveableBeast]

Omg. My votes have DOUBLED in one day.

From 4 to 8 lmao.

Humorously, that's the same ratio that a lot of guy's dicks grow when they log onto this site.

It's a great story. My favorite of the contest so far. Despite the fact that you and I don't always agree on things as posters. It has my whole-hearted recommendation.

Then again, with the way my story bombed out of the gate, a recommendation from me might do more harm than good.

 

[Carnal_Flower]

Thank you.

Yours didn't bomb. Its "Hot". Its got at least ten votes.

I'm wondering if the title was a mouthful.

But I've learned my lesson. If I ever post in EH again, it'll be werewolves all the way.

Humorously, that's the same ratio that a lot of guy's dicks grow when they log onto this site.

It's a great story. My favorite of the contest so far. Despite the fact that you and I don't always agree on things as posters. It has my whole-hearted recommendation.

Then again, with the way my story bombed out of the gate, a recommendation from me might do more harm than good.

 

[AMoveableBeast]

Thank you.

Yours didn't bomb. Its "Hot". Its got at least ten votes.

I'm wondering if the title was a mouthful.

But I've learned my lesson. If I ever post in EH again, it'll be werewolves all the way.

Actually, werewolves do better in Non-Human. They have quite a rabid following.

There's a terrific werewolf parody in this contest, too, actually.

 

[lovecraft68]

Thank you.

Yours didn't bomb. Its "Hot". Its got at least ten votes.

I'm wondering if the title was a mouthful.

But I've learned my lesson. If I ever post in EH again, it'll be werewolves all the way.

I only have two over there and I've found crazy females slaughtering their way through stories does pretty well.

 

[lovecraft68]

Humorously, that's the same ratio that a lot of guy's dicks grow when they log onto this site.

It's a great story. My favorite of the contest so far. Despite the fact that you and I don't always agree on things as posters. It has my whole-hearted recommendation.

Then again, with the way my story bombed out of the gate, a recommendation from me might do more harm than good.

I partially agree as in they claim 4-8 but in reality

My wife is fond of saying weathermen are typical men they predict more inches than what actually shows up.

I myself never lie. I told her I'd give her over twelve inches

I just never told her it would take two times to get there.

 

[Carnal_Flower]

I see your werewolf, and call you a satyr.

Actually, werewolves do better in Non-Human. They have quite a rabid following.

There's a terrific werewolf parody in this contest, too, actually.

 

[sr71plt]

Has the contest closed down yet? Posting continues two days after the deadline.

 

[TxRad]

Has the contest closed down yet? Posting continues two days after the deadline.

Yeah, a lot of people noticed that.

 

[lovecraft68]

Has the contest closed down yet? Posting continues two days after the deadline.

Which is totally unfair to the people in this thread-and every contest thread-who fret and stress and rush to hit a deadline and even more unfair to the people who end up giving up because they wouldn't make it.

I've noticed two stories, both front runners, who are blatantly in the wrong category as well to keep votes down and take advantage of sweeps. That's unfair as well and something the site should be noticing

But these things have stopped being about fair a long time ago.

 

[tomlitilia]

Which is totally unfair to the people in this thread-and every contest thread-who fret and stress and rush to hit a deadline and even more unfair to the people who end up giving up because they wouldn't make it.

But isn't this just because it takes a few days to get stories approved? The deadline is for submission, and it can take a few days before posting. Or am I missing something?

 

[sr71plt]

But isn't this just because it takes a few days to get stories approved? The deadline is for submission, and it can take a few days before posting. Or am I missing something?

For some time there you could count on your contest entry to be posted the next day, yes, but the last few contests, my contest postings have gone to two or three days, yes, thus erasing that advantage of posting to the contest rather than just to the general file.

 

[lovecraft68]

But isn't this just because it takes a few days to get stories approved? The deadline is for submission, and it can take a few days before posting. Or am I missing something?

In this instance concerning this person you are missing a lot and several people could enlighten you on why this stinks to high heaven

But in typical lets ignore any real issue fashion the site declared we are not allowed to discuss underhanded tactics that way it can continue to happen.

 

[sr71plt]

What I've always found eyerolling here is how gullible people are to think that 150 people can even read a 53,000-word story here in one day to vote legitimately on it. (And how cynical writers here must have gotten not to even bother trying to hide what's going on.)

 

[AMoveableBeast]

I'll be the first to admit that I cheat.

I'll even tell you how I do it.

Girl Scouts.

That's right, Girl Scouts.

I'd heard they were getting progressive, and, boy, are they ever.

You buy enough Samoas and Tag-Alongs, and those little devils will vote on anything.

Well, almost anything. I don't think it's going to work this time. Looks like some of those little brats went and got their reading comprehension merit badges on me. They know shit when they see it now.

It's a shame. I don't know what I'm going to do with all these cookies. I still have Thin Mints left over from my last contest win.

Hey, wait. I know. *shakes cookie box at Laurel*

How many for a green E? Come on, come on....C'mon!

I'll let you know how my attempt to scam the system goes.

 

[legerdemer]

I'll be the first to admit that I cheat.

I'll even tell you how I do it.

Girl Scouts.

That's right, Girl Scouts.

I'd heard they were getting progressive, and, boy, are they ever.

You buy enough Samoas and Tag-Alongs, and those little devils will vote on anything.

Well, almost anything. I don't think it's going to work this time. Looks like some of those little brats went and got their reading comprehension merit badges on me. They know shit when they see it now.

It's a shame. I don't know what I'm going to do with all these cookies. I still have Thin Mints left over from my last contest win.

Hey, wait. I know. *shakes cookie box at Laurel*

How many for a green E? Come on, come on....C'mon!

I'll let you know how my attempt to scam the system goes.

LOL

I can be bought for a good chocolate truffle. Hershey's need not apply. Or some good scotch. Anyone, anyone? No?

 

[lovecraft68]

When someone enters five consecutive times at zero hour its not an accident its a strategy and one that succeeds.

Cheating? No simply creating a formula that takes advantage of variables that play into what can
Can win in a system that really can't level a playing field this varied.

A few people here are aware of how to post something for max effect because its obvious but most choose to simply play straight up. Others want every edge

Last minute extremely long and placed in the lowest boted category it would qualify in are all edges on their combined its a no doubter.

Comes down to personality some want to go straight up post when its done post based on what they want rather than a formula and roll with it.

Some need to win at all costs.

In a tournament analogy most fight fair some sucker punch. Whatever it takes is more important to some than just taking the best shot.

 

[AMoveableBeast]

LOL

I can be bought for a good chocolate truffle. Hershey's need not apply. Or some good scotch. Anyone, anyone? No?

This reminds me of the time, some years ago, that a friend of mine talked me into being one of the options in a dating auction at the art museum.

"Alright, fifty dollars. Do I hear fifty dollars? Fifty. Just fifty dollars, folks....The number five, followed by the number zero....Two times twenty-five. Less than the price of a good steak dinner....Which is included in this date....Not as expensive as filling up your car with premium gasoline...It's for a good cause. His good qualities include breathing and not being able to be in two places at once....Oh dear."

 

[loquere]

I once entered the contest at the last minute, so sometimes it could just be procrastination.

When someone enters five consecutive times at zero hour its not an accident its a strategy and one that succeeds.

Cheating? No simply creating a formula that takes advantage of variables that play into what can
Can win in a system that really can't level a playing field this varied.

A few people here are aware of how to post something for max effect because its obvious but most choose to simply play straight up. Others want every edge

Last minute extremely long and placed in the lowest boted category it would qualify in are all edges on their combined its a no doubter.

Comes down to personality some want to go straight up post when its done post based on what they want rather than a formula and roll with it.

Some need to win at all costs.

In a tournament analogy most fight fair some sucker punch. Whatever it takes is more important to some than just taking the best shot.

 

[sr71plt]

Where does one find an eighteen-year-old Girl Scout these days?

 

[AMoveableBeast]

Where does one find an eighteen-year-old Girl Scout these days?

If I clean the house, fix dinner, and buy the expensive wine...hanging in my wife's closet.

 

[sheablue]

If I clean the house, fix dinner, and buy the expensive wine...hanging in my wife's closet.

Your wife has an eighteen year old girlscout hanging in her closet???

I'm not sure why we're talking about girlscouts, but there are two almost eighteen year old girlscouts in my neighborhood. I forget what they are called. Like Eagle Scouts, but for girls. They recently won a huge award for inventing an inexpensive water filtration system for villages in India. Over achievers.

I can be bought, also, but not with Girl Scout cookies. Unless you offer to buy some. I am the 2nd grade Brownie leader, after all.

However, I will do almost anything for fine dark chocolate and good whiskey.

 

[legerdemer]

This reminds me of the time, some years ago, that a friend of mine talked me into being one of the options in a dating auction at the art museum.

"Alright, fifty dollars. Do I hear fifty dollars? Fifty. Just fifty dollars, folks....The number five, followed by the number zero....Two times twenty-five. Less than the price of a good steak dinner....Which is included in this date....Not as expensive as filling up your car with premium gasoline...It's for a good cause. His good qualities include breathing and not being able to be in two places at once....Oh dear."

See, I think your friend just didn't provide the right patter. Something like, "Can type one handed. With the right incentive, he doesn't need hands at all, he can simply dictate!"