Biggest pet peeves?

[wetandwhat]

You're not alone in doing this. Someone does it every week. I just don't see how anyone who posts on what they want on the measuring issue, specifically, isn't telling others what they should write or enjoy reading here. I think it's a MYOB issue myself. Not my issue if you're the one who posted it. I don't initiate posts on pet peeves or how I want stories here to be to meet my requirements. Sorry, I see that it is your issue--you originated the thread. But, as I said, you are in a large crowd of posters doing it. As far as responding to the thread, you posted it for discussion. You gets what you asks for.

And you did ask for pet peeves, didn't you? Well you got one of mine, so I'm right on point on the thread question.

I'm planning on posting a lot more of my stories on here. If you want to be read and enjoyed you need to understand your audience. I'm not gonna ask what everyone likes because that's crazy I can't please everyone, but I CAN pay attention to what are huge turn offs for a lot of people. Its a much smaller and more easily controlled issue from my end of things. So that being said I will never include telling others what they should write or enjoy in one of my stories just for you. Note taken.

 

[lovecraft68]

Another thing is basic consistency. If an author has a character act and think a certain way, then they do a three sixty for no reason it kills it for me.

 

[sr71plt]

I'm planning on posting a lot more of my stories on here. If you want to be read and enjoyed you need to understand your audience. I'm not gonna ask what everyone likes because that's crazy I can't please everyone, but I CAN pay attention to what are huge turn offs for a lot of people. Its a much smaller and more easily controlled issue from my end of things. So that being said I will never include telling others what they should write or enjoy in one of my stories just for you. Note taken.

This is a huge site offering stories to a vast range of readers. You don't have to ask anybody what their pet peeves are (although you mostly just gave yours, which doesn't fall into the reasoning of this post of yours). You just write what you want to write and there will be an audience that finds you.

You're just spinning wheels needlessly with this approach as a Literotica writer (or trying to tell writers to cater to just you.)

 

[HandsInTheDark]

Where to start?

Perfect characters, especially perfect doms and subs who always do everything right. It only shows you've never been one or talked to one.

Any overuse of turgid. Which is nearly any use.

Any first time sexual experience that doesn't contain a fair amount of emotional upheaval. Actually, any first time story in general; I rarely write them and don't read them. Few people wait to have sex until they are 18 anymore; so any such story that can be posted here is almost by fiat unrealistic. You end up explaining why she (or perhaps worse, he) waited so long. Since the only workable answer is Shyness, you end up with a cliche. (The one time I pulled it off, it was a fantasy story with a cultural setting so intricate the sex was almost lost in the plot, and it was still a cliche.)

Mechanical descriptions of sex in general. Yes I want to know what happens, but knowing that 9" of this is cramming into 5" of that, overly detailed descriptions of color and shape (please, blood can just be red, it's ok) and so on just doesn't work for me. (Maybe this is a quirk of mine: in porn, I get bored when the camera focuses on the nether regions because I want to see faces and emotions.) And I do not care to know that his wang is pounding her cervix. Unless it's my wang or cervix, I wouldn't know that, and I'm told it's painful, not sexy.

Any story that is basically "and then they fucked. The end." (Yes, I wrote one, but someday I'll fix the ending.)

Inconsistent settings. This bugs me in more places than erotica. At the first contradiction of your world's physics or setting description, I'm out.)

Any story that starts with "we're fucking". Sex is only hot in an emotional context. Otherwise you're just making babies, and that happens all the time.

 

[wetandwhat]

What you don't like turgid? Come on turgid nipples man......I just really wanted to write turgid nipples and have it read once in my life.

 

[HandsInTheDark]

Oh. And long descriptions of food or clothing. Yes, I know. That can really work for many female readers. But in the male world, women wear shirts, blouses, skirts, pants and dresses. That's about all the words we know and want to know. Underneath there may or may not be a bra and panties, and most of us know quite well what a thong is, but that's about it. You can get some mileage from stockings or cocktail dresses, but the difference between a 4" and 5" heel is lost on me. I do not know what a trapeze dress is, and since I'm looking for the part where it gets torn off anyway, knowing it's hemmed with rhinestones really doesn't help. And it's possible that people who eat exotic belgian chocolate festooned with a raspberry creme border and hand-filled with a mixture of stone ground walnut, honey and orange peel go on to have wonderful sex, but I never actually find out because I've fallen asleep while she's eating some piece of what is probably candy, unless it's a Monet painting.

 

[Hypoxia]

I don't bother with pet peeves in amateur fiction any more. It's either written well or it ain't, and even good writers have imperfect editors. I try to gloss-over the usual ineptness.

No, my pet peeve at LIT lies elsewhere: here. The forums. Specifically, the snide sniping and full flame wars between various commentators. My IGNORE list has grown. Fuck y'all.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Where to start?

Perfect characters, especially perfect doms and subs who always do everything right. It only shows you've never been one or talked to one.

Especially when they're apparently telepathic and know one another's preferences without ever having to discuss it.

 

[TxRad]

Especially when they're apparently telepathic and know one another's preferences without ever having to discuss it.

What! You can't look into someones eyes and see that they love butt sex while hanging from a trapeze?

You need to work on that.

 

[Handley_Page]

Oh. And long descriptions of food or clothing. Yes, I know. That can really work for many female readers. But in the male world, women wear shirts, blouses, skirts, pants and dresses. That's about all the words we know and want to know. Underneath there may or may not be a bra and panties, and most of us know quite well what a thong is, but that's about it.
You can get some mileage from stockings or cocktail dresses, but the difference between a 4" and 5" heel is lost on me. I do not know what a trapeze dress is, and since I'm looking for the part where it gets torn off anyway, knowing it's hemmed with rhinestones really doesn't help.
And it's possible that people who eat exotic belgian chocolate festooned with a raspberry creme border and hand-filled with a mixture of stone ground walnut, honey and orange peel go on to have wonderful sex, but I never actually find out because I've fallen asleep while she's eating some piece of what is probably candy, unless it's a Monet painting.

Oh how true.

What! You can't look into someone's eyes and see that they love butt sex while hanging from a trapeze?

You need to work on that.

We all need a bit more training, I suspect.

 

[AZMotherLover]

But how will you know that my character has a 12 inch cock unless unless I tell you?

 

[R. Richard]

Claims that the story is a true account of the author's experience. Oh, puuul-ease!

I can assure you that I don't write this type of thing, unless the statute of limitations has run out some time before.

 

[SandraMustard]

I can assure you that I don't write this type of thing, unless the statute of limitations has run out some time before.

Actually, I was waiting for someone to mention that 90% of my stories claim to be my true experiences. I guess my self mockery isn't appreciated either.

 

[Swilly]

This is a huge site offering stories to a vast range of readers. You don't have to ask anybody what their pet peeves are (although you mostly just gave yours, which doesn't fall into the reasoning of this post of yours). You just write what you want to write and there will be an audience that finds you.

You're just spinning wheels needlessly with this approach as a Literotica writer (or trying to tell writers to cater to just you.)

Speaking of big dicks....


Understanding what the pet peeves of others are may actually help one become a better writer. It may serve as useful criticism in a way, causing an author to think a bit more about something they write. Of course, someone could have an extremely narrow perspective on such things and go on endlessly about it and not see the forest for the trees.

 

[oggbashan]

But how will you know that my character has a 12 inch cock unless unless I tell you?

I wrote a story about a man with a large cock without mentioning measurements.

This one:

http://www.literotica.com/s/pride-3

 

[Carnal_Flower]

Yes!

I think of a pet peeve as something sort of off the wall, that might bug you but no one else. I cannot stand descriptions of food in fiction. I can't stand seeing people eat on film or TV. It's my thing. Worst phrase a writer can use? "He chewed thoughtfully."

Other things

Cutesy words like yummy, tummy, "pumpkin" as an endearment, overuse of giggling and pouting

The phrase "A furrowed brow"

Unnecessarily long scenes. That is the kiss of death.

Oh. And long descriptions of food or clothing. Yes

 

[sr71plt]

I wrote a story about a man with a large cock without mentioning measurements.

This one:

http://www.literotica.com/s/pride-3

I did as well. A GM one.

http://www.literotica.com/s/long-john-silverman

 

[rudeshrew]

Stories where someone takes so much physical punishment that IRL they'd be dead or severely injured...but in the story, they're barely affected.

"Ow, my bottom stings!" No, actually, you're in a coma now.

 

[lovecraft68]

Women who orgasm while being raped

I understand many authors do that because of lit's "victim should enjoy it" rule but its still ridiculous. What its really for is so people can feel less guilty about having rape fantasies.

Same reason incest readers never want to see non consent, keeping it consensual eases the feeling of what incest is in r/l.

Understandable in fetishes that are in real life crimes, but still eye rolling in certain circumstances.

I want to see someone write a rape story with accuracy, like the woman pissing herself in fear.

Sexy, no?

Oh, wait, to some of that crowd it might be.

 

[oggbashan]

Oh. And long descriptions of food or clothing. Yes, I know. That can really work for many female readers. But in the male world, women wear shirts, blouses, skirts, pants and dresses...

While I agree that overlong descriptions of clothing can be distracting, there are readers who like that.

Several of my stories, particularly The Silverbridge Chronicles, feature significant descriptions of female clothing often used as bondage on men.

I have to rearrange/retitle that series so that they are together, and I am thinking of adding an introduction specifying that they are Femdom including use of female clothing. They are all really 'Fetish' and my stories that include the clothing descriptions do have a limited following.

But they are not mainstream erotica and I should make it clear that they are not for general readers of porn.

I started writing as a Fetish specialist, trying to write for particular Yahoo Adult Groups, and it shows in many of my stories. I still write some stories with Fetish themes, but I am trying to write more general stories. Unfortunately that sometimes means that the sex loses out.

What I should do is make the Femdom with clothing theme obvious at the start of the story, perhaps in the header, so that those who don't like that can back-click.

Some anon readers seem threatened by Femdom and react with abuse. I wonder why?

 

[DreamCloud]

Yes!
I think of a pet peeve as something sort of off the wall, that might bug you but no one else. I cannot stand descriptions of food in fiction. I can't stand seeing people eat on film or TV. It's my thing. Worst phrase a writer can use? "He chewed thoughtfully."

Other things

Cutesy words like yummy, tummy, "pumpkin" as an endearment, overuse of giggling and pouting

The phrase "A furrowed brow"

Unnecessarily long scenes. That is the kiss of death.

I am screwed - I violate many of these.

 

[Carnal_Flower]

Oh, er . . . "jmo" he he

Won't stop me from enjoying a great story.

I am screwed - I violate many of these.

 

[legerdemer]

"titties" - I absolutely ABHOR the word "titties"; what are we, 12?

 

[lovecraft68]

"titties" - I absolutely ABHOR the word "titties"; what are we, 12?

No, but titties has always seemed to me to be one of those little wink wink words that makes me wonder about the age of the character.

"Dick" is one that makes me think of twelve year olds, especially used in a sentence like, "That's it, baby, suck my dick."

All I can see is a twelve year old grabbing his crotch yelling, "Yo, suck my dick!"

 

[sr71plt]

"titties" - I absolutely ABHOR the word "titties"; what are we, 12?

Well, "pussy" has the same effect on me--but I don't read those stories anyway, so it doesn't bother me much.

I'd use "titties" in dialogue by a certain brand of character. It would help define the character.