Mental Illness

[ecstaticsub]

My girl is doing well!

Good to hear!

 

[FurryFury]

Thanks!

Good to hear!

 

[FurryFury]

A dark depression day hits my girl.

 

[FurryFury]

*HUGS*

the last couple days have been inexplicably rough on me too.

hard to get anything done.

 

[BiBunny]

I saw my doctor again today. She upped the dose of my antidepressant and gave me another one to start as well, in addition to some more sleep meds. We'll see how this works out, I suppose. It can't be much worse than it's been being, at least.

 

[FurryFury]

I hope it goes well for you on these meds BiBunny!

 

[Techchickuk]

Mothers....grrrrr

[However as someone with a mother that is not only mentally ill but also toxic to herself and everyone else, I have to say that in order to save oneself, sometimes strong limits are needed. I wouldn't say I've abandoned her but she would. She also wants to control me and eat my soul but anyway . . .[/QUOTE]

It's *so* good to read that. I haven't spoken to my highly toxic, damaging mother for 5 years.

People think I'm weird (ok, maybe a bit, but...!) but sometimes, you have to put your own needs first. And now I have my own daughter, I'm not having her damaged the way I was.

Good luck Furryfury - keep strong.

 

[moonbeam17]

However as someone with a mother that is not only mentally ill but also toxic to herself and everyone else, I have to say that in order to save oneself, sometimes strong limits are needed. I wouldn't say I've abandoned her but she would. She also wants to control me and eat my soul but anyway . . .

It's *so* good to read that. I haven't spoken to my highly toxic, damaging mother for 5 years.

People think I'm weird (ok, maybe a bit, but...!) but sometimes, you have to put your own needs first. And now I have my own daughter, I'm not having her damaged the way I was.

Good luck Furryfury - keep strong.

It isn't weird. I've a family member who's bipolar with ODD and she has crazy mood swings at times. Some days are good and she's a saint and others, nothing's going right in her life. Sometimes, it's also all your fault, because you did this to her. Eventually, I stopped placing my heart out in easy reach, because she just wasn't someone you could trust with it. Every so often, she'd squeeze and make you bleed. It didn't matter who or where.

Some people have problems and worse still, they refuse to acknowledge them. Until they do, I try to have as little contact with them as possible because as much as I might miss them as a person, I have to remind myself that there's always a Mr Hyde lurking around the corner and I need to safeguard myself.

I'd want nothing more than for her to live a happy and full life, rather than the chaos they create, but I also learned early on that they do need to fall flat on their face a few (sometimes dozen) times before they even glimpse that there might be a problem. Until they do, they're at the mercy of the whims of whatever afflicts them and by choosing to stay around them or "stick it out" I'm also choosing to be at their whims too.

No more sobbing, incoherent calls at 4 am. No more messages from the paramedic in the ambulance because she's having a panic attack while blind drunk. No more super-mega-ultra-drama over some boy / man that stopped talking to her. No more. I want a good life, so while I regret not keeping her as close as I could. I know it's necessary for me to have some much needed peace and mental stability.

I think about her often and I always ask about her when I can, but I never do much more than stick my toe in the water. She's one big murky pool with an emotionally dangerous deep end.

 

[ecstaticsub]

I saw my doctor again today. She upped the dose of my antidepressant and gave me another one to start as well, in addition to some more sleep meds. We'll see how this works out, I suppose. It can't be much worse than it's been being, at least.

I hope the change works out for you.



Just curious, did your doctor tell you the benefit of both increasing the dose of the 1st antidepressant and adding a new one? Did she explain the reason behind her choice not to just increase the dose of the first one?


(I ask because back 30 years or so when I did my first psych rotation it was common for Dr's to believe that patients would do better with less information about their medications. At the time we started a program to counter that and give patients more information. (after discussing it with their doctor of course) This was in the age before the internet and the explosion of information, and misinformation. I'm just wondering what her thought process was and whether she shared that with you)

 

[FurryFury]

I understand.

*hugs*

[However as someone with a mother that is not only mentally ill but also toxic to herself and everyone else, I have to say that in order to save oneself, sometimes strong limits are needed. I wouldn't say I've abandoned her but she would. She also wants to control me and eat my soul but anyway . . .

It's *so* good to read that. I haven't spoken to my highly toxic, damaging mother for 5 years.

People think I'm weird (ok, maybe a bit, but...!) but sometimes, you have to put your own needs first. And now I have my own daughter, I'm not having her damaged the way I was.

Good luck Furryfury - keep strong.

[/QUOTE]

 

[FurryFury]

Well crap on toast, just found out a dear friend of ours is in the hospital for feeling suicidal. Expected my daugther to feel not so great today as a result.

 

[BiBunny]

I hope the change works out for you.



Just curious, did your doctor tell you the benefit of both increasing the dose of the 1st antidepressant and adding a new one? Did she explain the reason behind her choice not to just increase the dose of the first one?


(I ask because back 30 years or so when I did my first psych rotation it was common for Dr's to believe that patients would do better with less information about their medications. At the time we started a program to counter that and give patients more information. (after discussing it with their doctor of course) This was in the age before the internet and the explosion of information, and misinformation. I'm just wondering what her thought process was and whether she shared that with you)

She did. I was just lazy on the explaining.

The new med is both antidepressant and sleep aid. Since she's not writing Ambien prescriptions anymore (something about new cardiac warnings?), she decided to go with that one instead.

 

[ecstaticsub]

She did. I was just lazy on the explaining.

The new med is both antidepressant and sleep aid. Since she's not writing Ambien prescriptions anymore (something about new cardiac warnings?), she decided to go with that one instead.

Great! Thanks for answering. I know there are still doctors (esp psychs) who believe that patients do best with less info about the drugs they are on. I was just wondering.

I like Ambien but only for very limited use. I have a prescription for 15 tablets that I am just now getting to the bottom of after 3 years. I know they are probably out of date, too. I do believe that people living alone should not take it. The nocturnal sleep walking/eating/talking/driving is just too risky.

 

[bluesky496]

the superficial morals of Victorian times have left modern society with ideas of what is normal and what is not ,i have been told by medical professionals that cross dressing is a sign of mental instability and a form of depression ,but i am not depressed when i do it nor do i think are most people who indulge in alternative life styles or sexual practices .
i think people who judge us in that way are ignorant of the facts and do not understand what drives us to follow the paths we choose .

 

[KatherineAlex]

Just needing to vent...

I have been crazy rapid cycling over the last few weeks, talk about an unhappy roller coaster. As a fairly new mom it makes the mood swings even more precarious and seeking help even more important.

I having been having a really hard time finding a new therapist who I feel is a good fit. I never had this problem until now. I wonder if my standards are just crazy high and near impossible to reach. I now can relate a sympathize with individuals who quit or can't seem to stay with a therapist. Man I was lucky for the last 19 years finding therapists I liked. Perspective changes everything.

To make it worse trying to find a therapist when you are in the midst of it all is a whole new kind of fucked up insanity.

 

[FurryFury]

Agreed.

*hugs*

the superficial morals of Victorian times have left modern society with ideas of what is normal and what is not ,i have been told by medical professionals that cross dressing is a sign of mental instability and a form of depression ,but i am not depressed when i do it nor do i think are most people who indulge in alternative life styles or sexual practices .
i think people who judge us in that way are ignorant of the facts and do not understand what drives us to follow the paths we choose .

Being a new parent is very difficult. So, too is finding a good therapist that fits well. *hugs*

I have been crazy rapid cycling over the last few weeks, talk about an unhappy roller coaster. As a fairly new mom it makes the mood swings even more precarious and seeking help even more important.

I having been having a really hard time finding a new therapist who I feel is a good fit. I never had this problem until now. I wonder if my standards are just crazy high and near impossible to reach. I now can relate a sympathize with individuals who quit or can't seem to stay with a therapist. Man I was lucky for the last 19 years finding therapists I liked. Perspective changes everything.

To make it worse trying to find a therapist when you are in the midst of it all is a whole new kind of fucked up insanity.

 

[FurryFury]

My girl is doing well and has finally found a counselor she likes. I am hopeful that she can keep limits and habits to be healthy and independent. It may be a pipe dream but it's my dream.

My son agreed to go to a new counselor for "motivational counseling" yesterday. He needs it and I'm also hoping his screaming and kicking nightmares will lessen.

My mother is struggling and, as usual, won't let me help. I sent her some names and numbers that will also help if she would only let them. Breaks my heart.

Two out of three ain't bad though, right?

 

[Endless_Night]

My girl is doing well and has finally found a counselor she likes. I am hopeful that she can keep limits and habits to be healthy and independent. It may be a pipe dream but it's my dream.

My son agreed to go to a new counselor for "motivational counseling" yesterday. He needs it and I'm also hoping his screaming and kicking nightmares will lessen.

My mother is struggling and, as usual, won't let me help. I sent her some names and numbers that will also help if she would only let them. Breaks my heart.

Two out of three ain't bad though, right?

Sounds like a win to me, FurryFury!

 

[ecstaticsub]

My girl is doing well and has finally found a counselor she likes. I am hopeful that she can keep limits and habits to be healthy and independent. It may be a pipe dream but it's my dream.

My son agreed to go to a new counselor for "motivational counseling" yesterday. He needs it and I'm also hoping his screaming and kicking nightmares will lessen.

My mother is struggling and, as usual, won't let me help. I sent her some names and numbers that will also help if she would only let them. Breaks my heart.

Two out of three ain't bad though, right?

How are YOU doing? It's can be so difficult to manage our own mental health when the people we love the most are having so many issues.

How do you manage to not get overwhelmed by it all?

 

[FurryFury]

I'm okay, always, that's MY choice. I don't know how or why but I just keep going on. Thanks for asking.

How are YOU doing? It's can be so difficult to manage our own mental health when the people we love the most are having so many issues.

How do you manage to not get overwhelmed by it all?

 

[FurryFury]

So I should probably do something legal to make sure I can get info and protect my now adult child when she is having an episode. Not sure what or how, does anyone here have insight into this sort of thing?

 

[BiBunny]

So I should probably do something legal to make sure I can get info and protect my now adult child when she is having an episode. Not sure what or how, does anyone here have insight into this sort of thing?

I have no idea how you go about doing this. (Sorry, I know I'm useless.) You might try talking with your daughter's doctor or someone at his/her office to see if they can get you pointed in the right direction, maybe? I would imagine that'd be less nerve-wracking than just approaching a lawyer out of nowhere with that sort of thing.

 

[FurryFury]

Thanks BiBunny. You are far from useless lovely lady.

I have no idea how you go about doing this. (Sorry, I know I'm useless.) You might try talking with your daughter's doctor or someone at his/her office to see if they can get you pointed in the right direction, maybe? I would imagine that'd be less nerve-wracking than just approaching a lawyer out of nowhere with that sort of thing.

 

[ecstaticsub]

So I should probably do something legal to make sure I can get info and protect my now adult child when she is having an episode. Not sure what or how, does anyone here have insight into this sort of thing?

I think it is rather difficult to get that kind of blanket permission with an adult child. Your daughter can give her doctor or therapist authorization to discuss thing with you. She can always give permission if she is willing for you to have as much info as she wants you to have. The problem, of course if what happens if she won't give them permission.

Do you have a local NAMI chapter? Perhaps they can help you before you start asking lawyers.

 

[FurryFury]

I know she wants to be taken care of when she has a crisis. She has not fought me about money which is her money at all either. She seems not to value what her family does for her but she would agree I think to whatever.

I'll look into NAMI which I know nothing about.

I think it is rather difficult to get that kind of blanket permission with an adult child. Your daughter can give her doctor or therapist authorization to discuss thing with you. She can always give permission if she is willing for you to have as much info as she wants you to have. The problem, of course if what happens if she won't give them permission.

Do you have a local NAMI chapter? Perhaps they can help you before you start asking lawyers.