Born in the wrong era

[devinity7]

I would take this seriously as a life philosophy if just one person I've seen spout it could explain, in clear detail, what is "nice" and what is "sloppy".

Why does a tailored suit "say" better things about the wearer than an untailored suit other than that its owner had the money and the time to take it to a tailor to have it fitted? To me, it means just that. How does this abstract symbology exist? It's like looking for omens in the natural world. Why in the fuck is three crows good and two crows bad? Fuck off, you make no sense.

Are you telling me to, "fuck off?" If so, I wouldn't care if you owned an Armani, you obviously have no respect for anyone.

 

[Netzach]

You might be right, but do you think there is a limit as to what's acceptable or to each their own? And hell, even in the 50's, 60's and or any era, there were those that looked down on others and how they chose to express themselves. I don't care how someone walks down the street, but I do care how someone comes to my place of business, taking MY time and wanting something from me and not caring that they are a complete mess.

Of course we all joke about plumber's crack, but do we really want someone coming into our homes, with their pants hanging around their knees, shirt un-tucked and hair that looks like it hasn't been combed in weeks?

Really?

That's cool. I'll never forget my client who looked literally like a bag lady, and walked out a bag lady looking heiress in 40 grand worth of fur and cashmere sweaters and blingy purses when no one else would follow up with her. She was happy and her checks were good. She was also nice.

I laughed last that day on the floor, and I never forget that lesson.

Now I like to see how I'm treated when I dress down and have some cash to burn.

Like I said I've done hot. I've done clothes horse. I am past caring.

 

[Netzach]

I agree that sweats and pajama bottoms should never see the light of day. It doesn't take that much time, effort, or cash to dress in a manner that shows you haven't given up on life.

God forbid someone fail to care about the same things you do. Like something more important than how someone else is dressed.

 

[devinity7]

Really?

That's cool. I'll never forget my client who looked literally like a bag lady, and walked out a bag lady looking heiress in 40 grand worth of fur and cashmere sweaters and blingy purses when no one else would follow up with her. She was happy and her checks were good. I laughed last that day on the floor, and I never forget that lesson.

Now I like to see how I'm treated when I dress down and have some cash to burn.

She was your client, you were performing a service for her, she wasn't looking to offer you anything. I'm not saying someone has to come in wearing a suit or expensive clothing. Clean jeans and a nice shirt are acceptable. I suppose it's too much to ask someone to brush their teeth, wear clean clothes and comb their hair to a job interview.

 

[Netzach]

Ha, I used to work in an adult related business, and it never failed that the guys who came in wearing sweat pants were the ones caught masturbating and asked to leave.
"Confucius say, man with hole in pocket not feel crazy, feel nuts"

Same, and I'll say that sleaze fuckers without boundaries wore all kinds of fancy costumes.

 

[Netzach]

She was your client, you were performing a service for her, she wasn't looking to offer you anything. I'm not saying someone has to come in wearing a suit or expensive clothing. Clean jeans and a nice shirt are acceptable. I suppose it's too much to ask someone to brush their teeth, wear clean clothes and comb their hair to a job interview.

I've not clue what you're hiring for or managing. I assumed your "MY place of business" rant was about your clientele.

Maybe it's a pay scale that's only attractive to people who are not familiar with the workforce and its demands. Some people really are raised by wolves and it's too bad there aren't more ways to get people up on basics.

 

[BiBunny]

See, what I have a problem with here is that people think that others are supposed to dress a certain way in order to suit them, the observer.

Yeah, fuck you. You are entitled to precisely jack shit from me.

I'm 29 years old. I have more clothes and shoes than God because my mother buys them for me all the time, and I don't have the heart to throw any of it out. I did the sorority girl thing in college, but even then, we all wore t-shirts and shorts (or jeans and sweaters if it was cold) to class. We only got dressed up at night when we were going out.

And now? I work at home and have for years. I rarely leave the house unless I need to run errands or go to the grocery store or am suffering from a severe bout of cabin fever or whatever. So what's the point of me getting all dressed up to go out to Walmart for an hour and then come back home? It'll take me longer to get ready than it will for me to do what I need to do.

I like getting dressed up when the occasion allows for it--and I LOVE makeup. But my life doesn't really allow for it anymore, so I don't worry about it.

I truly don't care what people think. I used to care, but that was so long ago that I barely remember it. Until you start buying my clothes and paying my bills, it's really nothing to you whatsoever what I choose to wear out in public.

 

[Keroin]

Really?

That's cool. I'll never forget my client who looked literally like a bag lady, and walked out a bag lady looking heiress in 40 grand worth of fur and cashmere sweaters and blingy purses when no one else would follow up with her. She was happy and her checks were good. I laughed last that day on the floor, and I never forget that lesson.

Now I like to see how I'm treated when I dress down and have some cash to burn.

Like I said I've done hot. I've done clothes horse. I am past caring.

Oh yeah, I remember the time I went shopping in Toronto at one of the "fancy" stores. I walked in prepared to drop a wad on something I liked, because I could. I was dressed very casual because I'd also been biking and some other stuff that day. I probably looked a little rough but I wasn't going to go all the way back to my hotel room just to look nice for the store clerks.

The store clerks followed me around the store like vultures. It was laughably obvious they thought I was going to shoplift.

I left without spending a cent. I only wish I'd stopped and told them all that they'd screwed over their commissions thankyouverymuch.

 

[devinity7]

I've not clue what you're hiring for or managing. Maybe it's a pay scale that's only attractive to people who are not familiar with the workforce and its demands. Some people really are raised by wolves and it's too bad there aren't more ways to get people up on basics.

You have a point there. It's like anything else, I know not everyone can afford to dress in expensive clothes and I myself have no desire to keep up with the Jone's, it just appalls me that people don't have any self respect. It's like going through a poor neighborhood with un-mowed lawns and garbage strewn about. Ha! I'm off topic.

You know, I hired a homeless lady before, she was the nicest lady you could meet. And even though she was homeless, she tried her best to make a good appearance.

Also, it wasn't about my clientele, it was about someone coming in asking for a job, big difference. I would never turn anyone away because of how they looked. My father had money, he was a huge miser, most times he never even wore his teeth when going out. And people misunderstood him and gave him sideways glances all the time. So I understand what you are all trying to say. Unfortunately, I fear my point is falling on deaf ears, I wasn't trying to offend anyone.

 

[Netzach]

See, what I have a problem with here is that people think that others are supposed to dress a certain way in order to suit them, the observer.

Yeah, fuck you. You are entitled to precisely jack shit from me.

I'm 29 years old. I have more clothes and shoes than God because my mother buys them for me all the time, and I don't have the heart to throw any of it out. I did the sorority girl thing in college, but even then, we all wore t-shirts and shorts (or jeans and sweaters if it was cold) to class. We only got dressed up at night when we were going out.

And now? I work at home and have for years. I rarely leave the house unless I need to run errands or go to the grocery store or am suffering from a severe bout of cabin fever or whatever. So what's the point of me getting all dressed up to go out to Walmart for an hour and then come back home? It'll take me longer to get ready than it will for me to do what I need to do.

I like getting dressed up when the occasion allows for it--and I LOVE makeup. But my life doesn't really allow for it anymore, so I don't worry about it.

I truly don't care what people think. I used to care, but that was so long ago that I barely remember it. Until you start buying my clothes and paying my bills, it's really nothing to you whatsoever what I choose to wear out in public.

This is what it all boils down to. There is no "must" unless I either feel like it or it's to my economic advantage. It WAS to my economic advantage to live in hose, heels, dry-clean only, groomed perfection. It is not currently. So I sound a resounding fuck that, with the exception of the occasions upon which I feel like it.

 

[Netzach]

You have a point there. It's like anything else, I know not everyone can afford to dress in expensive clothes and I myself have no desire to keep up with the Jone's, it just appalls me that people don't have any self respect. It's like going through a poor neighborhood with un-mowed lawns and garbage strewn about. Ha! I'm off topic.

You know, I hired a homeless lady before, she was the nicest lady you could meet. And even though she was homeless, she tried her best to make a good appearance.

Well, I don't think that cutting the grass is a super high priority if there's a drive by every week, call me crazy.

 

[devinity7]

Well, I don't think that cutting the grass is a super high priority if there's a drive by every week, call me crazy.

We can agree to disagree. I don't think all poor neighborhoods have drive bys, but perhaps I'm the crazy one.

 

[Loverskitten]

I'm enjoying this thread.
One important point I want to make is how you dress doesn't boil down to money. I almost always buy second hand. I have NO money for clothes. I have put together a "black tie" outfit for a charity event, for $25, including my dress, heels, clutch, and jewelry. One can pick up a great suit, get it tailored, and look far more polished, for less money than an ill fitting, off the rack suit. Plus it's a fun challenge.

 

[devinity7]

I'm enjoying this thread.
One important point I want to make is how you dress doesn't boil down to money. I almost always buy second hand. I have NO money for clothes. I have put together a "black tie" outfit for a charity event, for $25, including my dress, heels, clutch, and jewelry. One can pick up a great suit, get it tailored, and look far more polished, for less money than an ill fitting, off the rack suit. Plus it's a fun challenge.

I agree completely. It's too bad most people wouldn't be caught dead in a second hand store. Who the hell knows where it came from?

 

[BiBunny]

This is what it all boils down to. There is no "must" unless I either feel like it or it's to my economic advantage. It WAS to my economic advantage to live in hose, heels, dry-clean only, groomed perfection. It is not currently. So I sound a resounding fuck that, with the exception of the occasions upon which I feel like it.

Haha, yes.

I don't even put clothes on at all unless I'm leaving the house.

 

[Netzach]

I'm enjoying this thread.
One important point I want to make is how you dress doesn't boil down to money. I almost always buy second hand. I have NO money for clothes. I have put together a "black tie" outfit for a charity event, for $25, including my dress, heels, clutch, and jewelry. One can pick up a great suit, get it tailored, and look far more polished, for less money than an ill fitting, off the rack suit. Plus it's a fun challenge.

I want to live in a world where more women get obsessed with the "fun challenge" of making fucktons of money in those down hours. I have to be really ruthless about any spare time that goes on outside the house at this point. I used to live in NYC, the idea of paying full price for anything and not looking and looking for the perfect thing was very very hard to train myself away from. Hours, HOURS went into this.

I used to recreationally shop, I get it, but I really wonder why guys are not assembling the perfect second hand sharpness so carefully. I think we're fucking ourselves for making this a high priority, and I really question anyone who judges someone else and polices her into something that may actually hurt her economically. Time is money.

 

[Netzach]

We can agree to disagree. I don't think all poor neighborhoods have drive bys, but perhaps I'm the crazy one.

Absolutely, but I always assume there might be some factor that I don't have to live with when I'm about to judge someone's lack of the same aesthetic concern I have.

 

[KoPilot]

Are you telling me to, "fuck off?" If so, I wouldn't care if you owned an Armani, you obviously have no respect for anyone.

That was a general "you"

And nobody's even remotely answered my question yet... the burden of proof is on you guys after all. Nobody's making a good case for it, just talking in circles.

"dressing well is good because dressing well is good"

 

[Netzach]

That was a general "you"

And nobody's even remotely answered my question yet... the burden of proof is on you guys after all. Nobody's making a good case for it, just talking in circles.

I'm unsure about this "back when men wore hats" nostalgia also. All that thirties glamour, most people looked like Dorothea Lange photos.

 

[Loverskitten]

I want to live in a world where more women get obsessed with the "fun challenge" of making fucktons of money in those down hours. I have to be really ruthless about any spare time that goes on outside the house at this point. I used to live in NYC, the idea of paying full price for anything and not looking and looking for the perfect thing was very very hard to train myself away from. Hours, HOURS went into this.

I used to recreationally shop, I get it, but I really wonder why guys are not assembling the perfect second hand sharpness so carefully. I think we're fucking ourselves for making this a high priority, and I really question anyone who judges someone else and polices her into something that may actually hurt her economically. Time is money.

Hey, on the time note, I could have saved myself all that time if I didn't even attend the charity event. But I did. I also didn't say my outfit even TOOK a great deal of time. Less time then going to a mall and paying retail!

Also guys do do this, where I live at least.

 

[Keroin]

See, what I have a problem with here is that people think that others are supposed to dress a certain way in order to suit them, the observer.

That's the heart of it for me. You dress how you want, I'll dress how I want. Everyone's happy. Start telling me how I am supposed to dress and I have a problem.

I have female friends who lived in some of those supposedly wonderful eras. The horror stories of having to walk to school in the middle of a prairie winter in a dress because girls were not allowed to wear pants? Are you kidding me?

I'm with Netz. Put your extra time into doing something that fulfills you or makes you money. We females have really been fed a line over the years, and we've run with it to our own detriment.

 

[KoPilot]

I was at a Five Guys the other day, and in line in front of us was a balding middle-aged man, probably 50's, who was wearing an entire adult baby getup. But it was subtle. His overalls could pass as something average at a glance; that is, until you saw the bulge of a diaper underneath, and spied the small embroidered rattle and teddy bear on the front. His "messenger bag" was actually a diaper bag. The shirt he was wearing underneath had matching teddies and rattles on it, and was probably custom-made.

First thing that crossed my mind when I saw him?

"Damn, that guy's hardcore. I wish I had that sort of confidence."

 

[devinity7]

That was a general "you"

And nobody's even remotely answered my question yet... the burden of proof is on you guys after all. Nobody's making a good case for it, just talking in circles.

"dressing well is good because dressing well is good"

My mistake then.

The thing with, "dressing well," is that it's all perception. I have no problem going to the store in a T and a pair of running shorts. Maybe someone would frown on that, I'm with you in saying I don't give a shit. My only point was there are times when it is more appropriate to dress a certain way. This could be my own opinion, that's fine. You and I are entitled to think however we want to.

Am I wrong to think that you might dress differently when going to a funeral, then when you're running errands?

 

[KoPilot]

My mistake then.

The thing with, "dressing well," is that it's all perception. I have no problem going to the store in a T and a pair of running shorts. Maybe someone would frown on that, I'm with you in saying I don't give a shit. My only point was there are times when it is more appropriate to dress a certain way. This could be my own opinion, that's fine. You and I are entitled to think however we want to.

Am I wrong to think that you might dress differently when going to a funeral, then when you're running errands?

We're not talking funerals, where you're generally there to pay your respects to the memory of someone's life and their surviving loved ones who are grieving. (Not that people, at least in my family, don't show up to funerals in all sorts of stuff.)

I can't believe you're comparing funerals to going to Wal-mart.

And I still have no idea what "nice" means.

 

[Loverskitten]

Hehe, I sort of thought when I started this thread it would go in the "things that aren't here anymore" way. But instead it has turned into an argument over sweatpants. Hey at least y'all wear em proudly! "We're here! We're comfy! Get used to it!"
There's also a heated debate over decorative towels in the "how to"
Love it!
Talk about a good use of time (ducks)