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Happily Married, Sexually Unfulfilled

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Porkwarrior said:
So yay or nay, hooker or FWB masquerading as one?
And yes I know, for a sexless marriage I have had an interesting holidays.
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Dr Dee says........ Fuck, I don't know. Both scenarios have the potential for getting really messy.

With the FWB you might be in danger of getting emotionally involved which is probably why your wife is against it. With an escort it's professional, which is probably why you can't fully enjoy it.

Don't know what to tell ya on that one. Maybe you'll need a man's advice.
 
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Porkwarrior said:
Happy New Year, all the married & unlaid, every one! :D

We had fun, and I am still tripping on the buzz. It took a bit of work, but any marriage worth anything deserves the effort right? My wife is Italian, as in born in Italy and speaks Italian as her first language (always fun when I get her mad and she starts with the never ending sentence, I don't know who the "Fun Ghoul" is, but my wife is a fan)......

Anywho, as much as she loves my mungicake family, and they adore her (especially my father) the Christmas turkey just doesn't do it for her. She misses her Catholic Christmas Eve seafood table (like "only fish on Friday", Catholic households only eat fish before Christmas Mass). Soooo it has become our NYE tradition to have a seafood dinner together on New Year's. Just us together.

My only commandment was "dress like you would if we were going out", and she did. A two piece dress my mother bought her years ago that she loves, showing off her belly button & cleavage, with a drape of small gold chains off her left shoulder. Absolutely stunning, I stopped breathing for a minute or two. If there was a way to describe someone you desire in an "off the charts" way as eating crab & lobster delicately...it would have been her last night. She caught me staring at her fingers picking apart crab legs and blushed, I don't know how she does it but she is the most graceful crustacean eater I have ever encountered, and I become entranced with just watching her fingers pick apart the shells, pluck the meat out, and slide a leg or tail between her red painted lips. And then her small dainty tongue pokes out and licks any flesh or juices that had the gall to be stuck on her chin.

Haa haa sounds silly, but it's what gets me about her in the moment and is fun to watch.

After dinner we danced to Sinatra songs, she would occasionally shift my hard on to a more comfortable place on her hip & smile, we watched a dirty French movie together and for most of it she was stroking my cock through my favourite pair of Italian tailored pants, and we made out like a pair of teenagers on the leather sofa. Was delicious.

A half hour before the ball dropped we made our way over to our friends house where the party was happening, beat everyone away from the sound system and danced again to "My Way", well occasionally danced but mostly just kissed. I had forgotten how wonderful my wife's tongue felt sliding into my mouth. Then the ball dropped and we just made out like teenagers standing in the middle of our friends living room, even got a few cheers when we passed the two minute mark, haa haa.

Made our way the two blocks back to our home (she walked, I mostly stumbled), we drank & laughed on our front stoop giving out Pick-Me-Up shots of champagne to all the other couples that were walking by for an hour (I drank, she smoked her once a year indulgent doobie), laughed with our neighbours when they stumbled home...

All in all was a great New Year's Eve...and it gave me a reminder of why I chose to be married to the woman I love.
No intercourse, but we ended the evening with a great handjob, and the whole while she was over me smiling listening the slick naughty sounds of her hand sliding over my cock. Was just great.



Just wanted to say, while I am still tripping off the NYE buzz, there are reasons we all chose to be wed to the people we love, and even though we or they may change as the years go on, it is still awesome having them in our lives. And sometimes we need reminding of that, and even better telling THEM that. Even if we don't get laid as often as we like, haa haa.

Happy New Year everyone.



http://us.123rf.com/400wm/400/400/ealisa/ealisa1101/ealisa110100002/8682036-pair-of-champagne-flutes-and-cork-on-a-black-background.jpg
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Glad to hear you had a good NY Eve.

My wife got a Kindle for Christmas and read "50 Shades" in two days. Of course, five minutes after everyone arrived at our house that night she had to announce to everyone that she had read it (something she scoffed at earlier in the year but read because "everyone else has read it so I have to".)
This is typical of her. She just has to make everyone think she is hip and keeping me happy in the bedroom.

Funny but it's the quality not the quantity of sex that's always been the issue. She's a pretty passive, unpassionate lover. Sex isn't natural for her. It's work to her. She likes to get off but doesn't really enjoy the process of getting there. Like she has said, "it's all about the end result" for her.

Anyways, when everyone left we had some aggressive, drunken sex that I barely remember. However, I woke her at 5 am and began fucking her again. She was liking it for the first 10 minutes...but then I kept going and going, nice steady rhythm--occasionally puncuated by a hard deep thrust that would make her gasp. I normally don't last like the guys in the movies but I was just enjoying it so much I purposely held off until she was begging me to cum. "Will you just cum already? I'm sore."

So while I did enjoy my holidays, it still doesn't make up for the years or boredom, rejection and unwillingness to even try new things. Or if she tries something, she is so put off during it that it's a huge turn off. I begged her to try a facial and she finally relented. And the whole time she looked like she was bracing to get smacked in the face andwhen I finally did. She wiped it off disgustingly and went "Ewwww. Well we tried it. Are you happy now?"

She really just doesn't get into the act itself. For her, sex is something she has to do as a wife so that everyone can think she's this hot 40-something milf.

Oh well, as long as she and everyone else is happy with our sex life. To hell with how I feel. LOL
 
This sounds like a great collection of testimonials to give us all hope that 2013 will become an improvement

I look forward to adding mine here, eventually
 
L8tnIt said:
This sounds like a great collection of testimonials to give us all hope that 2013 will become an improvement
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Sob, the gleam of the festive season is already fading. Tried coming on to the wife yesterday...she asked to stop, it felt "weird". :(

I had hope for a bit, ended up trolling Lit for a few hours and went to sleep with a raging hard on and too apathetic about it to even stroke. Sob.
 
Porkwarrior said:
Sob, the gleam of the festive season is already fading. Tried coming on to the wife yesterday...she asked to stop, it felt "weird". :(

I had hope for a bit, ended up trolling Lit for a few hours and went to sleep with a raging hard on and too apathetic about it to even stroke. Sob.
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Aww, poor lamb.

I said to my better half recently, in a sultry voice, right in his ear "I'm in the mood for you........"
He laughed and started talking about something else.
Ugh.
 
While I've often been tempted to contribute here, I hadn't until now. Simply because while my sex needs are greater than my spouses', I feel that I'm not in as bad of a situation as many of the posters here.

Anyway, I subscribe to a marriage blog that many of the people here might find interesting. This is the Authors take on it. You can read this post and related ones at Simple Marriage


Previously we’ve discussed the idea that there’s a low desire spouse and a high desire spouse on every issue and decision in marriage. And, no one is the low desire, or high desire on everything. Positions shift on different issues throughout the marriage.

Fact is, desire differences are going to happen – and the positions you take (low or high) are simply points on a continuum.

There will be a high desire spouse and there will be a low desire spouse. And contrary to popular belief, the high desire spouse isn’t always male. As the comments in the prior post attest, it’s just as likely that the high desire spouse will be female.

While neither the high or low desire position is right or wrong, one thing will be true … the low desire spouse always controls sex. And this is true whether the low desire spouse wants to, or likes it, or not.

Couples have often sought ways around this problem. Or more aptly stated, high desire spouses have sought ways to increase their spouse’s desire.

But, inevitably, the low desire spouse will control sex.
Here’s how this works:
1. The high desire spouse makes most, if not all, of the overtures and initiations for sex.
2. The low desire spouse decides which of the sexual overtures he or she will respond to.
3. Which determines when sex happens. Giving the low desire spouse de facto control of sex – whether he or she wants it or not.
 
Deprived_in_AZ said:
Aww, poor lamb.

I said to my better half recently, in a sultry voice, right in his ear "I'm in the mood for you........"
He laughed and started talking about something else.
Ugh.
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All I get is animosity and vicious anger! What one like me wouldn't be willing to do with one like you!
 
Reading some posts I made way back in 2008. As an update...I finally divorced him and moved out. The marriage was just not worth saving.
 
cyikac1986 said:
Reading some posts I made way back in 2008. As an update...I finally divorced him and moved out. The marriage was just not worth saving.
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Good for you that you decided on a course of action and acted on it.
I have been around since 2008 too.
 
jd_quiet_guy said:
What is this "intercourse" you all speak of?
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It is similar to saying "Vacation"to a Workaholic... As mythical as the Loch Ness monster, it seems that the only real proof that we used to have sex (those of us who are a part of this thread's 'community') is our offspring
 
L8tnIt said:
It is similar to saying "Vacation"to a Workaholic... As mythical as the Loch Ness monster, it seems that the only real proof that we used to have sex (those of us who are a part of this thread's 'community') is our offspring
Click to expand...

fuck. no kids.
 
No kids = no proof
Are you certaon that Sex was even a part of your relationship?*

* I jest. Of course Sex was a part of the relationship. Was being the operative word. Otherwise, you wouldn't be here*
 
L8tnIt said:
No kids = no proof
Are you certaon that Sex was even a part of your relationship?*

* I jest. Of course Sex was a part of the relationship. Was being the operative word. Otherwise, you wouldn't be here*
Click to expand...

that's both the greatest, and worst, welcoming to any club I've ever been a part of.


Thanks?


Thanks!
 
I jave stated this before, as have others:
This isn't necessarily a club that you want to be a part of
With that said, I will welcome you for myself... We, the Lonely Spouses, must seek solace somehow. Supporting each other seems to be as good a start as any
 
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