Bieng collared: What Does It Mean To You?

[Beck31]

Heard a discussion about this and thought it was an interesting question. For me personally my collar means my Mistress loves, respects, and trusts me to be
proud to be her puppy. The collar can mean different things to different people though. Its not just indicitive of someone dabbling in the lifestyle. It kind of acts like a wedding ring of sorts. Reminds me who I belong to and to be faithful to my owner as much as possible. I don't find it degrading at all like a few people I know do. I think it also shows a level of committment that goes beyond the fixed paramiters of play time. I am still new at this and might not get everything 100% correct so please be patient.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Dude, there are no universal rules. Who would make them, and who would enforce them?

I have seen "collar" become more and more and more like a wedding ring. If it works for you, that's great!

For the crowds I play among, it's usually been more like a signal that someone is bottoming for someone else while they wear it.

 

[desertslave]

The collar Master gave me (which isn't a typical collar at all, it's a simple silver chain) is sort of like a wedding ring, in that it's a symbol of our commitment, but since our M/s relationship is different that being married, is has different connotations. I've worn his collar for almost 13 years, but we've only been married for 7 (and that was because he made me LOL). For me, the collar will always have a deeper meaning.

 

[Netzach]

Hot accessory, tired of having to explain I'm not trying to stealth marry anyone if I want to attach a noob to a post with one.

 

[CutieMouse]

It's always interesting to me how much emphasis is placed on "collaring"... I suspect it's mostly an online thing. I doubt I'll ever bother to wear one; I know where I belong, jewelry aside.

 

[Beck31]

Bieng Collared: What Does It Mean To You?

Interesting. It might be an online thing but for some it is also a real world thing
I have and will wear a physical collar for my Mistress but that is usually not out in public. For public it goes back to the metaphysical collar and the mental collar keeps me in place and faithful 24/7. I don't see it as just jewlery but then
everyone is different. I like bieng collared and owned and hated bieng a stray.
Thank you everyone who took the time to read and respond to the thread(s)
You all are wonderful people and I hope each and every one of you has a really fantastic day.

 

[missgiter]

I've met several who wear collars. They tie it in with their wardrobe if they wear it out... I, however, don't think it does anything for me, and I don't hand them out, either.

It's a personal preference, and it's meaning is between you and your Dom.

 

[Beck31]

Thats a really good point. Mine just wasn't handed it. I had to earn it.
But yeah some people wear it and some don't. I could not see myself without one.

 

[HottieMama]

I currently wear a training collar 24/7. It was put on by my Domme in the recent past, and while I *could* take it off if I chose to, that would feel "weird" to me. Eventually, I will have a permanent, locking collar that I must EARN through service and acquiescence to her desires and demands...

I'm actually quite surprised about the attitude toward collars here.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I think most (women, subs) take collars pretty seriously.

I love to wear something around my neck, but I don't too often, because-- most (women, subs) take collars seriously... I am collared only to my self.

 

[desertslave]

My first Dom (male, switch) had a tat instead. It was simple, but significant to them.

 

[JustaSCOUNDREL]

Indeed you are correct that a collar has different meanings for different people. As one poster stated it may only be a convenient device to be used to attach a submissive to something or someone else.

For others it may be just as symbolic as a wedding ring or something even deeper and more important than a wedding ring. My slave wears and has worn her special collar 24/7 for several years. To us it is a symbol of our commitment to each other.

During play time I may also place a more functional collar around her neck. The play collar goes on in exactly the same way her slave collar did the first time. She kneels, lifts her hair away from her neck and bows her head slightly while I place the collar. Once in place she thanks me just as she did the first time. It is our little ritual that we both enjoy and is a reminder of our commitment to each other.

In the final analysis no matter what I or others any say, the only thing that is important is what the collar you wear means to you and your Mistress.

Mike

 

[JustaSCOUNDREL]

Double post. Sorry.

 

[Beck31]

Bieng collared...

Thanks Mike. Yeah that is a good point about the special meaning of a collar between a sub and domme. In my case I see my collar as a wedding ring and
I am learning that is normal within the lifestyle.

 

[SirLeo]

I am the only one that caught it? The thread title is not spelled correctly. Tie the noob to the post....

 

[switchbitch]

So many wonderful different ideas of what a collar can mean have been expressed here.
For me it is the outward tangible expression of the gift of submission and the honour of domination. To be heartowned. The acknowledgement of a bond expressed through domination and submission. Apart from being a hot as hell to feel that leather binding your neck or to place that leather on another's throat, the feel of fingers locked in between leather and throat accentuating the feel of control.mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm yummy

 

[Loverskitten]

I am the only one that caught it? The thread title is not spelled correctly. Tie the noob to the post....

http://i1239.photobucket.com/albums/ff512/Loverskitten/77633102.jpg

 

[geekmaster24]

It's always interesting to me how much emphasis is placed on "collaring"... I suspect it's mostly an online thing. I doubt I'll ever bother to wear one; I know where I belong, jewelry aside.

I agree, CutieMouse. I was always of the opinion why do I need to collar someone so that everyone else knows they are mine. Well why do more people need to know that. As long as she knows and I know, that should be enough.

 

[desertslave]

I agree, CutieMouse. I was always of the opinion why do I need to collar someone so that everyone else knows they are mine. Well why do more people need to know that. As long as she knows and I know, that should be enough.

If one plays socially, wearing a relationship-specific collar can be significant. Back in my early days (long before the internet and online customs) I wore my Sir's collar to indicate that I wasn't available to just anyone without his permission and supervision. It was especially useful at places like Hellfire on weekends, when the trolls and tourists were out with a vengeance.

 

[catalina_francisco]

It's always interesting to me how much emphasis is placed on "collaring"... I suspect it's mostly an online thing. I doubt I'll ever bother to wear one; I know where I belong, jewelry aside.

Pre-dates the online era to my knowledge.

Catalina

 

[Netzach]

Pre-dates the online era to my knowledge.

Catalina

Depends where you live, also. Who you were hanging out with. A lot of older people I know are like "collar of consideration? training collar? tooth fairy! pixies! It's just a piece of leather that tells people you like it IN the butt." Without the internet people were even more fragmented than the are now, probably as to "how to do things."

 

[desertslave]

Depends where you live, also. Who you were hanging out with. A lot of older people I know are like "collar of consideration? training collar? tooth fairy! pixies! It's just a piece of leather that tells people you like it IN the butt." Without the internet people were even more fragmented than the are now, probably as to "how to do things."

My early formal/social experience was in the NYC area. TES has been around a LONG time before the 'Net, and there were many common 'conventions.' I attended several 'collaring ceremonies' while there, as well as a few in the Bay area after my Sir moved to CA. I don't know about much of anything between the coasts, but that's how it was on both sides in the early 80s. But, as you said, these 'levels' are something new to me. It was an either/or back in the day.

 

[Netzach]

My early formal/social experience was in the NYC area. TES has been around a LONG time before the 'Net, and there were many common 'conventions.' I attended several 'collaring ceremonies' while there, as well as a few in the Bay area after my Sir moved to CA. I don't know about much of anything between the coasts, but that's how it was on both sides in the early 80s. But, as you said, these 'levels' are something new to me. It was an either/or back in the day.

I was brought in/up among gay dudes from SLC and Chicago who were brought up old school - much more Texas Pinning and less Collaring Ceremony. I'm not saying never, I'm just saying, depends who/where.

 

[pandapompom]

As a sub it would mean everything to me. It would give me purpose, meaning. It would be a belonging and a sense of pride.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I was brought in/up among gay dudes from SLC and Chicago who were brought up old school - much more Texas Pinning and less Collaring Ceremony. I'm not saying never, I'm just saying, depends who/where.

My understanding is that if a dude could bend a dude over, that dude was his boy. And if a dude had a need to drag a dude around by the neck that dude got a collar. Or the big dude's belt, threaded through the buckle and hung onto by the tail.