I refuse to help stupid people even if I love them

[Very_Bad_Man]

I received an email from my cousin requesting a loan. He is behind on bills.

I have made a tentative reply:

Dear Cuzz

You have 2 empty freezers in the basement running and 2 refrigerators (only one with shit in it). You have every cable channel which is absurd. Unless things are changed every light in your house is on, even in unused rooms. I love you but you are an idiot who is unwilling to compromise. I am not giving you money to piss away because you are an idiot.

Turn off 2 freezers and 1 fridge, shut off all but basic cable and the internet, turn off lights in unoccupied rooms. Shut your 3 kids cell phones off. We survived without them. In a month check your savings and get back to me. Stop living beyond your means.

Your tough love cousin,

Anthony

Am I wrong here or should I just help a loved one out?

 

[semen4her]

I'd help but I refuse to help stupid people too.

 

[SweetGasps]

Family members like this make me want to slap some sense into them. We have a family friend who is like an aunt to me. She can't afford her meds or doctor copays but everyone in her family has a Corvette. Bitch, please. Cut back on your frivolous spending and put your health first before trying to keep up with all the Jones'.

 

[semen4her]

Family members like this make me want to slap some sense into them. We have a family friend who is like an aunt to me. She can't afford her meds or doctor copays but everyone in her family has a Corvette. Bitch, please. Cut back on your frivolous spending and put your health first before trying to keep up with all the Jones'.

Either that or move somewhere civilized where you can still live a good life and afford the meds you need.

 

[clutch1]

If this is the first time he's asked, I'd help him.
And if he asks a second time, before paying back the first loan, then drop the hammer on him.

 

[clutch1]

Although I did loan money to a friend one time, and before he paid me back I counted everything he spent money on.
It could drive you crazy.
The guy even went on vacation before he paid me.

 

[warrior queen]

I never lend money.
I gift it, because then I don't have to worry about getting it back.
But I only do so very rarely.

 

[Bert Notorius]

I received an email from my cousin requesting a loan. He is behind on bills.

I have made a tentative reply:

Dear Cuzz

You have 2 empty freezers in the basement running and 2 refrigerators (only one with shit in it). You have every cable channel which is absurd. Unless things are changed every light in your house is on, even in unused rooms. I love you but you are an idiot who is unwilling to compromise. I am not giving you money to piss away because you are an idiot.

Turn off 2 freezers and 1 fridge, shut off all but basic cable and the internet, turn off lights in unoccupied rooms. Shut your 3 kids cell phones off. We survived without them. In a month check your savings and get back to me. Stop living beyond your means.

Your tough love cousin,

Anthony

Am I wrong here or should I just help a loved one out?

I see you wised up and joined the Tea Party.

 

[blobfish]

You love your cousin?

 

[pink]

As far as I know, we only go around once in this world. Help out who you can.

and give good advice when you can.

 

[BgMma]

I received an email from my cousin requesting a loan. He is behind on bills.

I have made a tentative reply:

Dear Cuzz

You have 2 empty freezers in the basement running and 2 refrigerators (only one with shit in it). You have every cable channel which is absurd. Unless things are changed every light in your house is on, even in unused rooms. I love you but you are an idiot who is unwilling to compromise. I am not giving you money to piss away because you are an idiot.

Turn off 2 freezers and 1 fridge, shut off all but basic cable and the internet, turn off lights in unoccupied rooms. Shut your 3 kids cell phones off. We survived without them. In a month check your savings and get back to me. Stop living beyond your means.

Your tough love cousin,

Anthony

Am I wrong here or should I just help a loved one out?

Nope. Not your problem.

I love my family, too, but I have my own bills and I am far from rich.
Tough love IS love, if you ask me.

 

[mediocre]

As far as I know, we only go around once in this world. Help out who you can.

and give good advice when you can.

But giving a drunk a drink isn't helpful.

Giving him a solution to his problem works better in the long run.

 

[BgMma]

But giving a drunk a drink isn't helpful.

Giving him a solution to his problem works better in the long run.

Usually the solution is a drink. They go away faster if you give a drunk a few dollars.

 

[naughtycakes]

Your letter is way too harsh.

You love him? Be a little more diplomatic, soften the blow and don't come off as such a know-it-all prick.

However much he's asked you for, give him a fraction, whatever you can afford, as a gift. Give him a grand or something, tell him you can't afford to lend him money, you don't want it to come between you, but you have $X to spare and he can catch up on a couple of bills and doesn't have to pay you back. Let him know you don't lend money to friends or family as a rule, can't afford to anyways, good luck.

 

[sereneone4u]

As far as I know, we only go around once in this world. Help out who you can.

and give good advice when you can.

He would not be helping them. He would be enabling them.

That is not love.

 

[sereneone4u]

I received an email from my cousin requesting a loan. He is behind on bills.

I have made a tentative reply:

Dear Cuzz

You have 2 empty freezers in the basement running and 2 refrigerators (only one with shit in it). You have every cable channel which is absurd. Unless things are changed every light in your house is on, even in unused rooms. I love you but you are an idiot who is unwilling to compromise. I am not giving you money to piss away because you are an idiot.

Turn off 2 freezers and 1 fridge, shut off all but basic cable and the internet, turn off lights in unoccupied rooms. Shut your 3 kids cell phones off. We survived without them. In a month check your savings and get back to me. Stop living beyond your means.

Your tough love cousin,

Anthony

Am I wrong here or should I just help a loved one out?

Tough love, VBM, tough love.

 

[phrodeau]

You could offer to cover the cost of converting his electric meter to a coin-operated one.

 

[slave_]

I received an email from my cousin requesting a loan. He is behind on bills.

<snip>

Am I wrong here or should I just help a loved one out?

Key thing here people... His cousin, your cousin, IS BEHIND ON HIS BILLS. You are helping him by offering advice on HIS BILLS, by cutting them down, expenses that are wasteful, thus, surprise will lower his bills.

Now whether or not the 'bills' in question are the bills that you mention, still, trimming his use down will save him money overall.

There is waste in running lights, 2 freezers and one empty refrigerator, all not in use. Cutting energy bills alone, never mind the other things you mentioned, should give him extra cash.

 

[Liar]

My brother is a weirdo. Freakishly talented in some areas but when it comes to everyday stuff, he's an idiot. But at least he is smart enough to know this.

So when he called me to ask for help with his bill situation it wasn't to borrow money, but to see if I could help him see where he could save money.

After five minutes with his stack of bills, I had three questions.

1.
"Why do you have two home insurances? And also two auto insurances? For your one house and one car?"

"I do?"

"Yeah. Here, here, here aaaand... here."

"Is that an insurance? It says mortage."

"Yeah, you signed an insurance as an extra via the bank when you took the loan. It says right here."

"Ooh, that's what it says."

"Ok, sp cancel the other one. What about the double car insurances?"

"No idea. Must have bought one and then forgot about it."

2.
"Do you really need all those magazine subscriptions?"

"What magazine subscriptions?"

"These six."

"I pay for those? I toss them away all the time. Thought it was junk mail."

3.
"Do you usually pay your neighbor's parking space rent? Maybe it's time to start checking that your mail is actually, you know, yours."