My story was rejected for Grammatical reasons

[utty]

I am relatively new here and would like to introduce myself. I live in the Midwest. I am a lesbian and I occasionally write stories that are of a sexual nature. I decided that I would like to share some of them here.

This site is a bit daunting and I feel lazy. All I want to do is successfully submit a story that I just wrote. I submitted it a few days ago and it was rejected because of grammar. They also mentioned something about dialogue not being laid out right.

My story is about a young woman who sees a female psychologist and the psychologist starts making moves on her basically. I think it's well written. I have left it open to future chapters as this story can certainly grow.

I guess, long story short, I need an editor.

I am a female. I would want the editor to be female as well but that's my only request on it.

 

[BONNIEBREA]

Not having seen the story I can't comment on the grammar, usage, or punctuation issues. But I could suggest that you take the comments to heart and begin to train yourself in these matters. A lot of people have the desire and enthusiasm to share their ideas, but lack the mechanical skills to proceed. And those skills really are important. Using the established grammar, usage, and punctuation conventions makes your stories understandable and contributes to a reader's enjoyment. It's very tough to follow a story and appreciate things like character and plot when a reader has to wade through misspellings and punctuation problems.

Again, I can't speak to your story specifically, but I've done a little bit of editing here and about half the stories I edited were really ready for editing - mostly polished spelling, grammar, usage, punctuation, and the need only for minor corrections or commentary on issues like characterization, plot, thematic issues, organization and the like. Half the stories I received were not remotely ready for editing: they were just too much of a grammatical and usage and punctuation mess.

You shouldn't be seeking an editor with the expectation of her being able to correct spelling, punctuation and usage issues. Those are skills you should have or learn, as they are the skills necessaryand expected of anyone who wants to convey their ideas through fiction.

I just had occasion the other day to do a long post in a thread on this board regarding a question about hyphenation. I used the Gregg Reference Manual to gather the information. You might want to pick one up. The one published last year is the 11th edition, and the work has been a standard in grammar and usage for about half a century.

Best wishes in your writing endeavors.

 

[utty]

I hear you. I really was surprised that my story was rejected. I thought I did a great job of editing it but there seems to be some guidelines for this site that I am unfamiliar with. For example I was told that any dialog must be a paragraph by itself even if it is one word. So that was a bit confusing to me. I would like to see examples of what they are talking about as this is not conventional grammar. There is no grammatical rule that says that anything in quotations needs to be a paragraph by itself. I guess what I am saying is that this site has some unique rules and I am only looking for guidance.

 

[BONNIEBREA]

I understand your confusion. It's not at all uncommon for someone to put up a post like yours after a story rejection, and, really, the process seems to be pretty haphazard and unpredictable. The posts are always followed others who cite stories that are almost unreadable, but that somehow made it through.

I don't know that the site has any hard and fast rules about grammar and usage. I think it would be hard to set any up - or require something like the Gregg Manual as the standard - and enforce them and really expect anything to ever be perfect enough for posting.

You're right about dialog. There is no need for a separate paragraph for every character utterance. It's very conventional to use the separate paragraph usage for continuing dialog of more that a couple lines, as that makes the conversation easier for the reader to follow, and even allows for the omission of a ," xxx said. in every line. The reader can just follow the conversation back and forth and will know which character is speaking (assuming the conversation is between two characters) by the paragraph breaks. But it's also entirely acceptable to have a character speak, close the quote, and proceed on with the same paragraph. It's also entirely acceptable to close a paragraph with a quote.

So I understand why you're scratching you head. Best wishes, and don't be detered or discouraged by this minor setback.

 

[utty]

Yes, I went back and read the reason for rejection again and really it was all about the dialogue. I didn't have much dialog but when I wrote it out it was embedded in paragraphs. I went back and changed that. I have now resubmitted it. I am hoping that it is accepted now. It was fun. I added new details and cleaned it up even further. Anyway, thank you for the time you took to respond. I did go to a college that focused relentlessly on grammar and punctuation etc. I managed to pass that but it's been a while and I am probably a bit rusty. This site will surely change that.

 

[sr71plt]

You can have narration and/or description going on in a paragraph with dialogue. What you shouldn't have is dialogue by more than one character in the same paragraph. Was that, perhaps, the problem? And are you punctuating your dialogue correctly?

If you want to check, post a couple of paragraphs of your dialogue. Perhaps someone can see something wrong with it that you don't.

 

[RomanSteel]

I find it difficult to understand that it would be rejected due to the reasons listed.
I say this compared to some of the many missteps in stories I've read on this site.

I can understand because of certain graphic natures, example: underage, beastiality, rape, and etc. But not one story based on your writing abilities, considering.

I hope that you get it published and that the feedback is enough to make you happy. Best of luck.

 

[sr71plt]

A lot of stories are initially rejected here on the basis of bad use of dialogue. When examples are given, invariably it's a problem with punctuating dialogue or with putting the dialogue of more than one character in the same paragraphy.

 

[utty]

Oddly, I am a bit shy about sharing it here. Somehow, sharing it at large on this website feels more comfortable. Go figure.

I decided to go and read a lot of other stories that were published on this site in order to understand what they are looking for concerning dialogue. Basically, what I came to understand is that I didn't break up the paragraphs enough. I had blocks of text. In those blocks of text I had one sentence responses here and there from the two people in my story. I have now broken it up a lot. I really hope this works. If not I hope that they will accept a third submission.

 

[PennLady]

Oddly, I am a bit shy about sharing it here. Somehow, sharing it at large on this website feels more comfortable. Go figure.

I decided to go and read a lot of other stories that were published on this site in order to understand what they are looking for concerning dialogue. Basically, what I came to understand is that I didn't break up the paragraphs enough. I had blocks of text. In those blocks of text I had one sentence responses here and there from the two people in my story. I have now broken it up a lot. I really hope this works. If not I hope that they will accept a third submission.

I don't think there's a limit on how many times you can submit a story; I'd guess until it's right.

If you wanted, you could share just a sample here, so we can get an idea. Or I'd be willing to look it over; click on my username to send me a private message and we can work out you sending it to me.

 

[glynndah]

Oddly, I am a bit shy about sharing it here. Somehow, sharing it at large on this website feels more comfortable. Go figure.

I decided to go and read a lot of other stories that were published on this site in order to understand what they are looking for concerning dialogue. Basically, what I came to understand is that I didn't break up the paragraphs enough. I had blocks of text. In those blocks of text I had one sentence responses here and there from the two people in my story. I have now broken it up a lot. I really hope this works. If not I hope that they will accept a third submission.

Big blocks of text are extraordinarily difficult to read. When in doubt, I almost always choose to divide a long paragraph into several smaller, easier to read sections.

 

[estragon]

Not for nuthin', but make sure your quotation marks are correctly placed. Nothing is more confusing than having quotation marks closed at the end of one paragraph, when the same speaker continues speaking at the beginning of the next. My reaction is confusion: has the other, or another, character begun to speak?

And quotation marks are a must. I know some people prefer the European style of an em-dash for spoken dialogue, but it's confusing on a US-based site like this.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

Not for nuthin', but make sure your quotation marks are correctly placed. Nothing is more confusing than having quotation marks closed at the end of one paragraph, when the same speaker continues speaking at the beginning of the next. My reaction is confusion: has the other, or another, character begun to speak?

And quotation marks are a must. I know some people prefer the European style of an em-dash for spoken dialogue, but it's confusing on a US-based site like this.

This is surely only French where their confusion between em-dashes, guillemets and tags would give sr a coronary. Spanish, German and Dutch are more Anglo-Saxon.

 

[vintagelady]

I have only ever written one story on lit (under a different guise) and have done a little editing elsewhere. I would be happy to look at the story for you , though I'm not sure how long it would take as life is hectic at the moment.

PM me, if you are interested

 

[sr71plt]

This is surely only French where their confusion between em-dashes, guillemets and tags would give sr a coronary. Spanish, German and Dutch are more Anglo-Saxon.

Since you invoked my name in this, is there an English translation for this post?

 

[lazyhobo]

You're right about dialog. There is no need for a separate paragraph for every character utterance. It's very conventional to use the separate paragraph usage for continuing dialog of more that a couple lines, as that makes the conversation easier for the reader to follow, and even allows for the omission of a ," xxx said. in every line. The reader can just follow the conversation back and forth and will know which character is speaking (assuming the conversation is between two characters) by the paragraph breaks. But it's also entirely acceptable to have a character speak, close the quote, and proceed on with the same paragraph. It's also entirely acceptable to close a paragraph with a quote.

I'd say that its How you use Dialog In the descriptive parts, if its like this for example, *Does something* Lots of talking *Does something* Then Its better with it para'd out. For the Mixture of speech and dialogue, if you have a few words here and their, it is appropriate to mix the speech and actions together, because its an easier read, But, if you did that throughout the entire story, they may have another opinion.
I personally always felt that Dialogue starts new lines / paras, because when I was a kid in school, thats how we were taught to write stories in English class.
Having the speech and actions seperated also offers benefits, for example, I've seen paragraphs where the author forgot to close the short speech with its ", and I got lost as to where the talking ended and the actions began. There are also times where I miss the quotation marks, and then I spend time re-reading the para, just to see if I missed them, because I'm confused with how its reading.

All in all, my only point was, It works, its good with short sayings, as long as its used in moderation, if they notice you doing it a bit, especially if they were raised in an english class environment like myself, they may think its bad *shrugs* Depends on the person reading it.

 

[sr71plt]

You can put action in with dialogue paragraphs. And it's fine to have dialogue followed by action description followed by dialogue by the same character, but, no, I wouldn't put dialogue by two separate characters or more in the same paragraph.

To the extent that anyone cares, the Chicago Manual of Style tends to agree (13.37), although it's a bit wishy-washy, using the word "usually": "A change in speaker is usually indicated by a new paragraph."

But, back to the original issue, I could see the website burping when it found quotes from more than one speaker in a paragraph.

 

[sr71plt]

Had to laugh just now. I was writing on my current pen name mainstream novel, and I wrote a short paragraph in which I have dialogue of two characters and can't think of any way to write it without both quotes being in the same paragraph:

"Ally had asked "alike like who?" and Miranda had said, "Like your father."

It just doesn't look right to me to split those.

 

[PennLady]

Had to laugh just now. I was writing on my current pen name mainstream novel, and I wrote a short paragraph in which I have dialogue of two characters and can't think of any way to write it without both quotes being in the same paragraph:

"Ally had asked "alike like who?" and Miranda had said, "Like your father."

It just doesn't look right to me to split those.

I wouldn't blink at this because you're relating what two people have said, as opposed to two characters having a conversation.

 

[lazyhobo]

"Ally had asked "alike like who?"

I just hope that's how your character talks, because otherwise, That my friend, IS a Grammatical error.

 

[sweet_lusciousdesire]

Just hang in there. I had trouble getting my first stories submitted because I was didn't know about some of their conventions for publication were. For example, each sentence of dialogue needs to be a seperate paragraph. When you type using word, you may notice a green underline. That is usually a indicator to move the sentence around a bit or shorten it, or whatever. I find editing tedious too. I would edit for you, but I'm not so swift in that department.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

Since you invoked my name in this, is there an English translation for this post?

See a doctor. I haven't invoked your name on this thread other than agreeing with you and thought things were better without your pirhana presence.

utty, two things the site seems to worry about are overlong paragraphs and dialogue. Simply, blocks of text more than 8-10 lines long are difficult to read on a backlit rolling screen.

Also, style rules - somewhat Third Reich - demand that you start a new paragraph when a second person speaks. This does help with avoiding the leaden weights of speech tags.

There are some useful essays on the 'How To' category.

 

[sr71plt]

I just hope that's how your character talks, because otherwise, That my friend, IS a Grammatical error.

Yes. (as I would think was obvious--especially since you pointed it out yourself.) Did you miss the creative writing class where it was pointed out that it's more than fine that dialogue be colloquial?

Is this "backbiters morning" here, or what?

 

[sr71plt]

I wouldn't blink at this because you're relating what two people have said, as opposed to two characters having a conversation.

Yeah, I see that. What was amusing to me was that I was trying to think of an example where you would do it during the earlier discussion on this thread--and couldn't. And then an example popped out at me in my own writing after I'd just naturally written.

 

[sr71plt]

Just hang in there. I had trouble getting my first stories submitted because I was didn't know about some of their conventions for publication were. For example, each sentence of dialogue needs to be a seperate paragraph. When you type using word, you may notice a green underline. That is usually a indicator to move the sentence around a bit or shorten it, or whatever. I find editing tedious too. I would edit for you, but I'm not so swift in that department.

Oh, I would turn off that function that's putting that line there when writing fiction. Grammar check wasn't created for fiction--and can do a lot of damage to your writing if you try to follow where it wants to lead you.