I spent some time with real writers today!

[CHNOPS]

I'm still all charged about this. I sat in a coffee shop today, and there were real writers there! They were typing things into computers and making markings with a pen on paper! It was exciting just to be around them.

I'm glad they chose to do their work there, or else I wouldn't have been able to be among them as they typed and wrote things. They looked like regular out-of-work people, but since they were writing, I'm pretty sure they were all famous!

What a day!

 

[thør]

I'm still all charged about this. I sat in a coffee shop today, and there were real writers there! They were typing things into computers and making markings with a pen on paper! It was exciting just to be around them.

I'm glad they chose to do their work there, or else I wouldn't have been able to be among them as they typed and wrote things. They looked like regular out-of-work people, but since they were writing, I'm pretty sure they were all famous!

What a day!

You were at Starbucks?

 

[Farrah]

I'm still all charged about this. I sat in a coffee shop today, and there were real writers there! They were typing things into computers and making markings with a pen on paper! It was exciting just to be around them.

I'm glad they chose to do their work there, or else I wouldn't have been able to be among them as they typed and wrote things. They looked like regular out-of-work people, but since they were writing, I'm pretty sure they were all famous!

What a day!

You're absolutely certain they were real writers? Did they have dark circles under their eyes? Did they give off a vibe of self-importance? Did the men have at least a day's worth of stubble growth? Did the women wear retro skirts or dresses and ballet flats? Did they appear to be making notes on pads and on their laptops?

These are all important qualities of real writers.

 

[CHNOPS]

You're absolutely certain they were real writers? Did they have dark circles under their eyes? Did they give off a vibe of self-importance? Did the men have at least a day's worth of stubble growth? Did the women wear retro skirts or dresses and ballet flats? Did they appear to be making notes on pads and on their laptops?

You mean, was I in Brooklyn? No! These were real writers that I saw with my own eyes.

I will never wash these eyeballs again.

 

[Wrong Element]

I'm still all charged about this. I sat in a coffee shop today, and there were real writers there! They were typing things into computers and making markings with a pen on paper! It was exciting just to be around them.

I'm glad they chose to do their work there, or else I wouldn't have been able to be among them as they typed and wrote things. They looked like regular out-of-work people, but since they were writing, I'm pretty sure they were all famous!

What a day!

Yeah, I wish it worked like that.

 

[IndieSnob]

You mean, was I in Brooklyn? No! These were real writers that I saw with my own eyes.

I will never wash these eyeballs again.

As someone who used to live in Brooklyn...

Oh wait, I can't deny what you're saying.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

They were composing unrhymed poetry, proberly perfessers hired with grants from the gubmint.

 

[Farrah]

You mean, was I in Brooklyn? No! These were real writers that I saw with my own eyes.

I will never wash these eyeballs again.

Okay, then. Just checking.

Did you get autographs?

I once worked for a freelancer. She was nearing deadline on a story on the Southern real estate market. I was her research assistant. I made $10 an hour. She asked me to interview developers, property managers and Realtors. I spoke with almost 25 people. She asked me start an outline. She asked me to come up with an opening. She asked me to come up with 3 sidebars to accompany the article. She asked me to write the entire article. I don't remember how many words they asked her for, but it became the main story in a well-known home/garden/southern culture magazine. With photos, the story got 10 pages. She made several thousand dollars off of that article. I got a research biline and free copy of the issue.

I hate writers.

 

[Phelia]

Ohhh! We have a real writers coffee shop around here, too. They look so productive, click-clacking away, notes fanned out on the table. I feel left out. I'd like to join them one day, but maybe with a typewriter. It's more authentic.

Still, it's better than investment banker Starbucks. Guys, no one wants to hear your office drama. Okay, yes I do.

 

[CHNOPS]

Okay, then. Just checking.

Did you get autographs?

I once worked for a freelancer. She was nearing deadline on a story on the Southern real estate market. I was her research assistant. I made $10 an hour. She asked me to interview developers, property managers and Realtors. I spoke with almost 25 people. She asked me start an outline. She asked me to come up with an opening. She asked me to come up with 3 sidebars to accompany the article. She asked me to write the entire article. I don't remember how many words they asked her for, but it became the main story in a well-known home/garden/southern culture magazine. With photos, the story got 10 pages. She made several thousand dollars off of that article. I got a research biline and free copy of the issue.

I hate writers.

It's easy to tell who the real writer was here: Which of you was in a coffee shop?

 

[CHNOPS]

Ohhh! We have a real writers coffee shop around here, too. They look so productive, click-clacking away, notes fanned out on the table. I feel left out. I'd like to join them one day, but maybe with a typewriter. It's more authentic.

Still, it's better than investment banker Starbucks. Guys, no one wants to hear your office drama. Okay, yes I do.

This thing you do where you're often not here, sucks.

 

[Farrah]

It's easy to tell who the real writer was here: Which of you was in a coffee shop?

Dammit, there was no coffee! She wouldn't even allow me to have coffee in her fucking office. I had to go into the kitchen every time I wanted a sip of water, much less coffee.

 

[Phelia]

This thing you do where you're often not here, sucks.

I know, I know. I'm terrible. But repentant! I promise. You got some new digs and everything!

 

[CHNOPS]

I know, I know. I'm terrible. But repentant! I promise. You got some new digs and everything!

No one could pronounce Sonny Limatina, so I had to go simple.

 

[Lord_Steve]

They were composing unrhymed poetry, proberly perfessers hired with grants from the gubmint.

i can overlook your frankly repugnant political opinions dude,

but if you disparage unrhymed poetry in my presence again we are going to have to take this outside

 

[semen4her]

Vag girl doesn't understand sarcasm I see.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

i can overlook your frankly repugnant political opinions dude,

but if you disparage unrhymed poetry in my presence again we are going to have to take this outside

I was suspicious youre an adjunct english perfesser who writes bad poetry as he cries into his latte and on his persimmon tart.

 

[thør]

Vag girl doesn't understand sarcasm I see.

How many writer do you see in Tim Hortons?

 

[Phelia]

No one could pronounce Sonny Limatina, so I had to go simple.

At least you didn't go with French. "Sonnent" might've been even trickier.

 

[Colonel Hogan]

Okay, then. Just checking.

Did you get autographs?

I once worked for a freelancer. She was nearing deadline on a story on the Southern real estate market. I was her research assistant. I made $10 an hour. She asked me to interview developers, property managers and Realtors. I spoke with almost 25 people. She asked me start an outline. She asked me to come up with an opening. She asked me to come up with 3 sidebars to accompany the article. She asked me to write the entire article. I don't remember how many words they asked her for, but it became the main story in a well-known home/garden/southern culture magazine. With photos, the story got 10 pages. She made several thousand dollars off of that article. I got a research biline and free copy of the issue.

I hate writers.

I was a writer. And an editor. Trust me on this. If you got publishable quotes from 25 interview subjects, wrote an outline, three sidebars, the lead and ultimately the whole damn piece, sweetheart, YOU are a writer.

The fact that she hired you for $10 an hour qualifies her to be a publisher.

 

[semen4her]

How many writer do you see in Tim Hortons?

I don't drink coffee, so I never go in them.

Besides, Canadian writers are poorer than American writers, so they usually hang out on park benches.

 

[Farrah]

Vag girl doesn't understand sarcasm I see.

I understand sarcasm just fine. It brought on a rant, is all.

Also, fuck off with the nickname.

 

[CHNOPS]

I don't drink coffee, so I never go in them.

Besides, Canadian writers are poorer than American writers, so they usually hang out on park benches.

Don't be so hard on Canadian writers. You guys have Saul Bellow and...um....

 

[thør]

I don't drink coffee, so I never go in them.

Besides, Canadian writers are poorer than American writers, so they usually hang out on park benches.

So, they aren't as good?

 

[semen4her]

I understand sarcasm just fine. It brought on a rant, is all.

Also, fuck off with the nickname.

Yeah, that's gonna help.