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anal sex

SlaveNienna said:
I am the recently collared slave of my Master who I have been seeing for about a month and a half now. We have had anal sex before but he has a really large and thick cock. I am the only person he has ever had anal sex with. I find it really difficult to take his cock there and can't help but to protest and beg for him to please stop. He's got it in a few times, but only really fucked me their once to take the initial ownership of it. I feel so bad when I protest because I really, really want to give it to him but it hurts so much, though the pain went away for the most part a little ways into the one time he took me there. I also feel kind of bad because he will try to force it in too quickly and I'll scream and beg and then he'll stop. He has been telling me to stretch my ass when I am not with him, which I have been, but it isn't making it any easier. He'll also do a little stretching of it early in our sessions and then try to take me many minutes later by which time the muscles have already contracted. I have expressed to him that he certainly has the right to take me their aggressively in spite of my protests ( which he did to take that initial ownership) but if he wants to make it more comfortable for me he has to stretch it out before he takes it. The problem is, now that I'm finally getting to it, is that I don't think he understands that it needs to be stretched immediately before penetration and not many minutes before due to his inexperience with anal sex. How can I express to him what I really mean to make the experience more pleasurable? I don't want to tell him what to do and I don't want to be rude or pushy by repeating what I've said or being too blunt, if you know what I mean. What I'd like to be able to do is show him what I mean while still retaining the submissive role and having him remain the one who is in control, but I am unsure how to do that. I am just so grateful to have this amazingly sexy, kind, patient, assertive, kinky, competant Master to own me I want to please him so bad and I want to be very careful about avoiding any behavior or language that he might find displeasing even in the absence of a punishment. I have been so good up to this point and am afraid to break the spell of his amazement to my good behavior and obediance. But at the same time I want to be able to submit my ass to him for penetration without protesting and whining so much. It just hurts so bad because of his enormously thick cock, lol. Not trying to brag, it's really ridiculously huge.
Any suggestions?
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Yes, so if it was me, I think all the begging and whining and screaming is a big plus. Maybe tel him you can't help it, and if it bothers him you can be gagged.

If he's big on pleasing you, you could tell him you read on the internet that it helps to stretch and stick it in right away.

Also use lots of lube.
 
Ffs just tell him to Google "safe anal sex" or something and make him educate himself. Unless you want some real risks for your health and life.
Taking care of your safety makes you just smart not less submissive :rolleyes:
 
niena quoth:
i am just so grateful to have this amazingly sexy, kind, patient, assertive, kinky, competant master
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your master is neither kind, patient nor competent if he refuses to educate himself in this area. he needs to be made aware that his ignorance is a violation of the trust you put in him and quite honestly, i don't think you're doing him--or yourself--any favors by not explaining just how big of a problem this is.

and present him with a big, big bottle of lube during your next meeting.

ed
 
My grandmother used to live by the saying, 'If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything', so I'm going to follow her and say nothing.


:rolleyes:
 
Make an instructional video for him. Get a few buttplugs of increasing size up to the circumference of his dick. Show him on video how you need to be played with and prepped before he inserts himself. Be creative. I am sure you can figure at a way to make it a very hot, teasing video that will sound more like a teasing turn on then an How To video.
 
SlaveNienna said:
I am the recently collared slave of my Master who I have been seeing for about a month and a half now. We have had anal sex before but he has a really large and thick cock. I am the only person he has ever had anal sex with. I find it really difficult to take his cock there and can't help but to protest and beg for him to please stop. He's got it in a few times, but only really fucked me their once to take the initial ownership of it. I feel so bad when I protest because I really, really want to give it to him but it hurts so much, though the pain went away for the most part a little ways into the one time he took me there. I also feel kind of bad because he will try to force it in too quickly and I'll scream and beg and then he'll stop. He has been telling me to stretch my ass when I am not with him, which I have been, but it isn't making it any easier. He'll also do a little stretching of it early in our sessions and then try to take me many minutes later by which time the muscles have already contracted. I have expressed to him that he certainly has the right to take me their aggressively in spite of my protests ( which he did to take that initial ownership) but if he wants to make it more comfortable for me he has to stretch it out before he takes it. The problem is, now that I'm finally getting to it, is that I don't think he understands that it needs to be stretched immediately before penetration and not many minutes before due to his inexperience with anal sex. How can I express to him what I really mean to make the experience more pleasurable? I don't want to tell him what to do and I don't want to be rude or pushy by repeating what I've said or being too blunt, if you know what I mean. What I'd like to be able to do is show him what I mean while still retaining the submissive role and having him remain the one who is in control, but I am unsure how to do that. I am just so grateful to have this amazingly sexy, kind, patient, assertive, kinky, competant Master to own me I want to please him so bad and I want to be very careful about avoiding any behavior or language that he might find displeasing even in the absence of a punishment. I have been so good up to this point and am afraid to break the spell of his amazement to my good behavior and obediance. But at the same time I want to be able to submit my ass to him for penetration without protesting and whining so much. It just hurts so bad because of his enormously thick cock, lol. Not trying to brag, it's really ridiculously huge.
Any suggestions?
Click to expand...
OK, somebody has to set you straight on the parts of your post that I've made bold. I don't want to make you think that either of you are being too naive about this, but I think it's going to seem that way, when I explain some things to you. I hope you understand that this is not my intent.

I am the only person he has ever had anal sex with.
What does that sentence tell you? It should tell you that he has no fucking idea what he's doing. If you've had anal sex before, you know more about it than he does. The problem with that is, he's not going to get hurt if it is done incorrectly...YOU ARE. If you've never had anal sex either, let me tell you that you aren't going about this the correct way. Both of you need read up on the proper way to attempt anal sex, safely. He's totally lost on how to go about it, and if his cock is that large, he's very likely to hurt you to the point you would need hospitalization. Tearing in the anal shaft is not a good thing to happen, and it is not only painful, it is very, VERY slow in healing.

but only really fucked me their once to take the initial ownership of it.
I'm lost as to what this might mean. Ownership? He doesn't own anything on your body, if he doesn't know how to take care of it. And you shouldn't be giving him the idea that he does. He's new to this anal sex thing and so the LAST thing he should "own" is is your asshole. He's the asshole, if you ask me. If you don't understand what I'm saying, see the previous paragraph.

I also feel kind of bad because he will try to force it in too quickly and I'll scream and beg and then he'll stop. This is NOT WHAT HE SHOULD BE DOING! THIS IS A VERY BIG RED FLAG! Yes, I'm yelling! Never EVER force it in, even when the damn thing fits like a glove. And if his cock is as large as you say, he's going to hurt you. It's just a matter of time. Anal sex can take time before it's possible. You need to relax and go slow. Light some candles, put on some soft music, and get a large...LARGE supply of good lube.

This might take more than one day, but take your time. If you do any of this too fast, you are only going to get hurt. Pain is your worst enemy. Slowly insert different size dildos or butt plugs, going slow enough that you can take them without pain. If you go too fast, it will just hurt, and you will tighten your ass against the pain and make it worse. He needs to understand that if you can't relax, nothing is going in, back there.

I have expressed to him that he certainly has the right to take me their aggressively in spite of my protests ( which he did to take that initial ownership) Wrong, wrong, wrong! He doesn't own your ass. He's not experienced enough to own anything. And it doesn't sound like you are experienced enough to know that, either. He has no right to be aggressive with anything until he knows the rules and can follow them. Even then, he must understand that he's got to stop any time you say, and you have to understand that if you hurt, you aren't suppose to allow him to continue, just because that's the submissive thing to do. Being submissive does not include being unsafe. It's your body. Remember that. You are just allowing him to use it...rent it, so to speak.

I don't think he understands that it needs to be stretched immediately before penetration and not many minutes before due to his inexperience with anal sex. This is correct, but it might not ever stretch enough that he can put his cock inside. If it's too large, your body will only stretch so far. Pain should always be your clue that it's not stretched far enough. The fact that you even say this tells me that you are letting him do something that could end up hurting you. Again, being submissive doesn't include being unsafe.

I am just so grateful to have this amazingly sexy, kind, patient, assertive, kinky, competant Master to own me. OK, he might be amazingly sexy, kinky, assertive and sometimes kind, but he's not that patient and he's far from competent. And a master he's not. He's just a newbie. They can't be called master. He might be an OK guy, and with some instruction, he could be a wonderful lover. And if he's willing to take the time to learn the proper way to attempt anal sex with you, he could eventually be everything you say he is, right now. But, he's not all that and a bag of chips, just yet. Sorry, my attempt at a little humor.

I want to be very careful about avoiding any behavior or language that he might find displeasing even in the absence of a punishment. I have been so good up to this point and am afraid to break the spell of his amazement to my good behavior and obediance. Wrong! What you need to be careful about is avoiding anything that can hurt your body. Safety comes first, before anything else. Only then, can you allow him to come close to being your dom or master. If you don't talk to him and make sure he is doing things the correct way, he's just going to end up hurting you and I don't think he wants that.

It just hurts so bad because of his enormously thick cock OK, this is not going to make you happy, but it's possible that you might never stretch enough for him to take you in the ass. If he's so terribly big, it just might not be possible. You need to know that, up front. But, if you both read up and learn the safe and correct way to anal sex, take your time and slowly stretch your ass and use a lot of a good quality lube, it's still possible.

The way you are doing it now is only going to end up hurting you and I know that neither of you want that to happen. I'm sure he's a good guy and so he should understand when you tell him what needs to be done. The two of you should get together, find some good instruction and then practice, practice, practice.

Remember, you are the one who sets limits on your body. If you can't do this without causing pain, you are going to have to say it just isn't going to work. I know that isn't something you want to hear, and I understand that. I'm very, VERY much into anal, and I'd hate to hear I couldn't fuck a cute little woman's ass. But, I also don't want to do it and end up hurting her, either. I'd rather find another way of enjoying her body, than risking so much pain that she could be physically hurt. Trust me...getting hurt back there is NOT a fun thing.

Take care and always play safe.
 
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I am just so grateful to have this amazingly sexy, kind, patient, assertive, kinky, competent Master to own me
Click to expand...

I saw zero "patience" or "competence" in the OP's post. I also didn't see lube mentioned, once. :rolleyes:

My current lover and I have known one another for two years. When we were first together, I brought up anal (in passing), and he it wasn't on the table - he was concerned about size/safety/etc [with good reason].

Fast forward a year or so, and we discuss it again... me being the kinky librarian type that I am, I gave him my copy of Anal Pleasure & Health. I have no clue if he actually read it or not, but he did overcome his initial concerns re: anal sex.

IMO, the first step is making sure lube is a normal, no big deal, every time part of sex. Period. He uses lube on me almost as a massage oil we go through so much of it. LOL While penetrating my vagina, he'll use his hands on my ass. (Which, for me, is psychologically hot as hell because it feels like he's masturbating while inside me, and I'm simply the "tool" to accomplish the task. Damn... moving on!) We've experimented enough to know that it takes at least 3 fingers in *easily* for me to be stretched properly. Sometimes he's the one adding lube and using his hands, sometimes he's controlling the lube and I'm reaching behind to stretch things for him.

Even then, *I* control the entry. It is worth 45-90 seconds of self-control on his part, to get what he/I want in the end (pun intended) - no holes bared anal rape... without any bad pain or damage.

My advice would be no anal until he either knows what he's doing, or is willing to listen/educate himself/practice what he's learned (with lots of communication along the way/agreement that if you say it's hurting, things pause/stop until you've adjusted). And there is NOTHING "unsubmissive" about acknowledging that you are more educated on a subject, and and using that knowledge to teach him - especially if/when your body has to deal with the consequences of his ignorance.
 
Oh hun...if you think this is awful, you should see some of the other stuff "we" post.

That said, DVS is pretty much spot on...
 
Wait, it originally said awful?! What the hell? That makes me really sad. I saw mountains of good advice in this thread. People seemed genuinely concerned about the OP's safety and answered her questions.. What the hell prompted the awful people comment? :(
 
As in, they're all 'awful' awful terrible people for offering proper advice, and not some wankfodder kudos for taking giant cock in her ass or whatever the OP was actually after, would be my guess.
 
HottieMama said:
Oh hun...if you think this is awful, you should see some of the other stuff "we" post.

That said, DVS is pretty much spot on...
Click to expand...
Thanks but watch it...there's still time for someone to come and correct my post. :rolleyes:
 
Etoile said:
Wait, it originally said awful?! What the hell? That makes me really sad. I saw mountains of good advice in this thread. People seemed genuinely concerned about the OP's safety and answered her questions.. What the hell prompted the awful people comment? :(
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Well, you live and learn. Some people think they already know how to do something and are just wanting others to enforce their opinion. Or when someone calls their studly man stupid, selfish or not worthy of the title master, some others tend to get upset. Shit happens. While I understand that she's not that happy with what she's been told, the word awful did throw me a little. It was a nice touch that she removed her complete post, even though others have already copied it into their messages. What do they call it? A knee jerk reaction? She might have second thoughts, but because her first was so vile, I don't think we'll hear from her again. But, I've been wrong before. I've been corrected before, too...recently, even.:D

And another thing...I thought I did a very nice job of bolding her comments and explaining them. That wasn't easy, you know. It took a significant amount of time and patience, not unlike anal sex. :cool:
 
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hey all submissive 27 male would love to be discplined, abused and forced to submit to mitress. no limits the nastier the better. please pm me if interested
 
hard27 said:
hey all submissive 27 male would love to be discplined, abused and forced to submit to mitress. no limits the nastier the better. please pm me if interested
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First thing you need to learn as a sub is to follow directions. House rules say to put your personals post in the personals forum.
 
It looks like she has recieved excellent advice. The problem is that most people her age think they invented sex. I am not trying to be an ass, as this is my experience. I know at 25 I thought I was a stud, and it took a while for me to realize that you never become an expert as there is too much to learn about a wide topic. I had a 20 year old tell me, a few years ago, that young people were doing something new now a days. After much encouragement she finally told me it was anal sex. I had to laugh and told her I had been having anal sex for 25 years and there was nothing new about it. LOL.
 
Dream59 said:
It looks like she has recieved excellent advice. The problem is that most people her age think they invented sex. I am not trying to be an ass, as this is my experience. I know at 25 I thought I was a stud, and it took a while for me to realize that you never become an expert as there is too much to learn about a wide topic. I had a 20 year old tell me, a few years ago, that young people were doing something new now a days. After much encouragement she finally told me it was anal sex. I had to laugh and told her I had been having anal sex for 25 years and there was nothing new about it. LOL.
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It seems that every generation (or at 95+%) are shocked to learn that they are in fact, not doing anything new.

Aside from internet related phenomena (aka video chat or sexting), there isn't that much new (and even then, video chat is just impersonal stripper show and sexting is immediately seeing a picture that could have been mailed to you).



DVS: Spot on post.



The only thing I would have asked the OP is:

Would you let anyone who has never gone to medical school be your Dr? Or would you cross a bridge built by someone with neither engineering nor construction experience? If not, why would you let someone with no experience with anal sex who, by all impartial accounts, is doing it wrong, take control of your body that way?

Doctors hire mechanics, lawyers go to dentists ... this is because no one person is an expert at everything and deferring to someone who is neither qualified nor interested in learning how to do something properly, is a recipe for disaster.

W~
 
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