Why Men?

[PanicByNumbers]

Hi. This question has honestly been bugging me for almost a year now and I really just can't keep privately musing to myself, I'd love some outside voices. Ladies (and any gay guys that feel like chiming in)...why men? Why do you like men? Why are you attracted to them? Is it because they're harrier? Are they funnier? Is it just because? I'm a straight male and while I can wrap my mind around why men are attracted to men, women to women, and men to women, I just don't understand why it goes the other way. Maybe I'm just putting too much thought into something that doesn't deserve the effort to think about it. But why? Just want to hear some other opinions and thank you in advance for the responses.

 

[emap]

I'm lost, you can understand why men like men, but you can't figure out why women like men?

That said, there are various reasons, for me it's nice eyes, a ready smile. Strong is good but really just the above and a cock. I guess you could say I have low standards, maybe I do but I found mine and quite happy.

 

[sunandshadow]

Definitely not because they are hairier, lol, I'm just as happy if they have no hair besides pubes and eyebrows/eyelashes/head hair. I usually see men as being more intense/passionate and less boring/practical than women, which is attractive to me, but I'm sure there's someone who disagrees that men are typically like that and women typically aren't. Then there's the physical stuff like men smell good and I prefer male voices to female ones and men's bodies are more triangular or square, less round, and I would not be happy with any lover who did not have a cock.

I don't think there's a lot of difference between what gay men find attractive in men and what straight women find attractive in men. I've read erotica written by gay men and I often agree with whatever a gay male viewpoint character is thinking when he evaluates the attractiveness of a man (unless the object of interest is someone totally not my type, such as a bear, or the viewpoint character has a totally different personality than me, such as being either an extreme submissive or an extreme dominant. And honestly, the guys I am attracted to in real life turn out to be gay an irritatingly high percentage of the time.

But seriously, if you want to know women's thoughts about men, read some romance novels. Romance novels are all about the female psychology of mate selection and falling in love and the struggle between skepticism and trust, and all that.

 

[klippert]

you've answered the question yourself......"your putting to much thought into it"

 

[GracefullyYours]

you've answered the question yourself......"your putting to much thought into it"

Yep. Biology.....

 

[TexasWife25]

I agree
there's not much difference between what a gay man loves about men and what a woman loves...

Big hands
strength
hard cock
deep voice
rough skin...

 

[amofiga]

Hormones. It doesn't matter what the speces, females "generally" like males and males "generally" like females. Of course, there are whatever DNA differences that trigger homosexual or bi-sexual responses as well. Above and beyond that with respect to specific selection, who knows. There are only a few other speces like whales and bonobo chimps that have sex just for fun and the hell of it versus for reproduction. I find it interesting that bonobos share 95% of the DNA chain as humans. Missing link?

 

[Boundlife]

men smell right,
men feel right...
It may seem odd to you but I like them

 

[Octavian]

You might as well ask...

Why does the Earth go round the Sun? Why do animals mate?
Opposite sexes attract. Pure and simple.

 

[EmaEsmerelda]

Easy. It's similar to why you like the opposite sex. Opposites naturally attract. Don't think of it in terms of individual traits. Body hair is a sign of masculinity so if you are a straight guy it's natural you wouldn't find it attractive, and as a bi guy I would not find it attractive on women but I think some is sexy on a man.

I am fine with the term homosexual but it's misleading in some ways. I find women attractive because femininity is generally foreign and exciting to me, it's that sense of being different that causes the sexual arousal and emotions. It's the same with men, even though I am a man myself, I feel like the opposites attract principal is working there as well, though it doesn't prevent me from feeling like a man.

YES! I think it is more the contrast. I also think it is deeper than aethestics and bio-chemistry. I think there is an energy to it as well. I love how Tantra emphasises that masculine energy is not gender specific. For me there is a natural sense of strength and leadership in a man that incites feelings of surrender- not just Dom/Sub surrender, but a surrender to yourself as a woman. Just seting aside everything and going with it because it feels right. I do enjoy how a male mind works. This is not in a derogatory way, but it is just simpler, more concise- there seems to be less clutter in male thought process verses a female's. There is just a presence or an aura, something not so tangible but very real-for me atleast, that predicates attraction.

Everything in this world works from duality to oneness, from chaos to order- very elegantly. What's to say anything differently of our sexuality or psychology?

Another thought could be social conditioning, maybe I was raised (socially and culturally) to be attracted to men and got specific in my own turn-on's through my discovered preferences. That being said, what my "type" was as a young girl is VERY different from my "Type" now.

 

[PanicByNumbers]

YES! I think it is more the contrast. I also think it is deeper than aethestics and bio-chemistry. I think there is an energy to it as well. I love how Tantra emphasises that masculine energy is not gender specific. For me there is a natural sense of strength and leadership in a man that incites feelings of surrender- not just Dom/Sub surrender, but a surrender to yourself as a woman. Just seting aside everything and going with it because it feels right. I do enjoy how a male mind works. This is not in a derogatory way, but it is just simpler, more concise- there seems to be less clutter in male thought process verses a female's. There is just a presence or an aura, something not so tangible but very real-for me atleast, that predicates attraction.

Everything in this world works from duality to oneness, from chaos to order- very elegantly. What's to say anything differently of our sexuality or psychology?

Another thought could be social conditioning, maybe I was raised (socially and culturally) to be attracted to men and got specific in my own turn-on's through my discovered preferences. That being said, what my "type" was as a young girl is VERY different from my "Type" now.

(breathes sigh of relief) Thank you all again for your honest and thoughtful responses. It's just that the question (concept?) has been bouncing around in my mind for a while now and I just thought maybe I could get some perspective if I voiced it out loud so to speak. When I'm attracted to women I'll openly say I prefer redheads and while I find red hair desirable in a partner, the women I've been the most 'ga ga' for were brunettes. I understand that a crucial point in honest attraction is an intangible (but very real) chemistry. While I may find a redheaded woman physically beautiful, if she's a total bitch I'm going to turn off. Meanwhile a woman who doesn't precisely strike me as my "type" but I just can't get enough of her, I'm just high off her presence. Once again just hoping for some perspective.

 

[RomanSteel]

I guess it depends on the male. If just saying "why men" in general, I say Penis. I like it very much.

But as for specifics to the men I choose. It belongs in types of men.

Sex only men - the Caveman factor.
...meaning I want a man that can throw me over his shoulder and have his way with me and tell me what to do and then go home

Relationship men - a sense of security, humor, nice hands, arousing scent, a good coupling of our minds, and the ability to talk about anything.. as well as good sex and even better lovemaking

 

[sunandshadow]

When I'm attracted to women I'll openly say I prefer redheads and while I find red hair desirable in a partner, the women I've been the most 'ga ga' for were brunettes. I understand that a crucial point in honest attraction is an intangible (but very real) chemistry. While I may find a redheaded woman physically beautiful, if she's a total bitch I'm going to turn off. Meanwhile a woman who doesn't precisely strike me as my "type" but I just can't get enough of her, I'm just high off her presence. Once again just hoping for some perspective.

Well that's true for everybody. I mean, my ideal man has long black hair, no facial hair, is under 150lbs, has really white smooth skin, a narrow nose, high cheekbones, an IQ of 130+, etc. But I totally wish I could screw my brother's friend who is a blond with a goatee, at a guess 200lbs, and peach slightly rough skin. Why? Because he has a wonderful personality, if I'm in a room with him and a bunch of other people I want to be the one he's focusing on so I can soak up his presence.

 

[HeyAll]

Definitely not because they are hairier, lol, I'm just as happy if they have no hair besides pubes and eyebrows/eyelashes/head hair. I usually see men as being more intense/passionate and less boring/practical than women, which is attractive to me, but I'm sure there's someone who disagrees that men are typically like that and women typically aren't. Then there's the physical stuff like men smell good and I prefer male voices to female ones and men's bodies are more triangular or square, less round, and I would not be happy with any lover who did not have a cock.

I don't think there's a lot of difference between what gay men find attractive in men and what straight women find attractive in men. I've read erotica written by gay men and I often agree with whatever a gay male viewpoint character is thinking when he evaluates the attractiveness of a man (unless the object of interest is someone totally not my type, such as a bear, or the viewpoint character has a totally different personality than me, such as being either an extreme submissive or an extreme dominant. And honestly, the guys I am attracted to in real life turn out to be gay an irritatingly high percentage of the time.

But seriously, if you want to know women's thoughts about men, read some romance novels. Romance novels are all about the female psychology of mate selection and falling in love and the struggle between skepticism and trust, and all that.

Nice post, but the bolded part really caught me eye. How would you consider that men are less boring than women?

 

[sunandshadow]

Nice post, but the bolded part really caught me eye. How would you consider that men are less boring than women?

Well, it's my opinion that men are more likely to be ambitious and strive hard for those ambitions, more likely to get in fights, more likely to party hard, and overall more passionate than women. This isn't an inherently positive trait, as it's the reason there are a lot more men in jail than women, and the reason many young men manage to kill or permanently injure themselves doing risky stunts, but it's also the reason there are more famous male artists, musicians, and CEOs.

 

[Boundlife]

Well, it's my opinion that men are more likely to be ambitious and strive hard for those ambitions, more likely to get in fights, more likely to party hard, and overall more passionate than women. This isn't an inherently positive trait, as it's the reason there are a lot more men in jail than women, and the reason many young men manage to kill or permanently injure themselves doing risky stunts, but it's also the reason there are more famous male artists, musicians, and CEOs.

So your talking about basic temperment of the group as a whole?
{just checking to see if I've got your point}

 

[RAddams]

Hmmmm?
My list of why I think women love us men:
1. yes all that hair
2. the testosterone that oozes from our pores
3. the incredibly stupid shit testosterone makes us do
3. the masculine stench of our various body odors
4. the feeling of our stubble as it grinds and irritates their sensitive areas
5. the incredibly stupid shit we will do to get laid
6. our pleasant farts (yes they can't get enough of that man joy)
7. the sophisticated appearance of male genitalia
8. our thoughtfulness in leaving the toilet seat up for them

Damn I just ran out of reasons.

 

[Farrah]

Hmmmm?
My list of why I think women love us men:
8. our thoughtfulness in leaving the toilet seat up for them

Oh my gosh, this^^^. You men are so, so thoughtful that way!

 

[RAddams]

Oh my gosh, this^^^. You men are so, so thoughtful that way!

Its my pleasure and I know how sexy it is so please don't mention it.

 

[Farrah]

Its my pleasure and I know how sexy it is so please don't mention it.

You know what's super sexy? When I come down to pee in the middle of the night, stumble half-asleep to the bathroom, sit down and feel cold water hit my ass 'cause there's no freakin' seat to catch me!

Good thing you guys make up for it with your big strong hands and your amazing smells and your deep voices. Rawr!

 

[sunandshadow]

So your talking about basic temperment of the group as a whole?
{just checking to see if I've got your point}

Yes, or at any rate on the average instead of as a whole. Certainly there are individual men who are very laid-back or mousy. But the overall tendency of the male sex to have strong emotions is at least partially a result of testosterone. Everyone's heard of 'roid rage, but steroids are an artificial version of natural hormones which are normally present in men in larger amounts than women, and thus their effects on temperament naturally occur more in men than women.

You see average differences in temperament between the two sexes in all sorts of animals. There's a reason men and women have often been analogized to roosters and hens, or bulls and cows.

 

[RAddams]

You know what's super sexy? When I come down to pee in the middle of the night, stumble half-asleep to the bathroom, sit down and feel cold water hit my ass 'cause there's no freakin' seat to catch me!

I sure hope you're not the type to stretch plastic wrap over the bowl for revenge.

 

[Farrah]

I sure hope you're not the type to stretch plastic wrap over the bowl for revenge.

Only once. It was April Fool's Day. I hated my roommate. He was an asshat. But my dumb ass didn't take into consideration that he would never clean the bathroom up after I pulled the prank on him. I moved out around the first of May. You know, the smell of urine never really goes away.

 

[RAddams]

Only once. It was April Fool's Day. I hated my roommate. He was an asshat. But my dumb ass didn't take into consideration that he would never clean the bathroom up after I pulled the prank on him. I moved out around the first of May. You know, the smell of urine never really goes away.

Ah yes
9. our incredible bathroom hygiene

 

[Boundlife]

Hmmmm?
My list of why I think women love us men:

You list has me so hot...