Going from submissive to Mistress???

[Love2Lust]

Hi All,

My boyfriend and I are in a fairly new relationship, still exploring things with each other, but one thing is certain: we BOTH want to be submissive. We're both comfortable switching roles back and forth, but I have never been in the position of power and I'm totally lost.

I need tips on how to gain confidence in this new position. How to assert myself and how to make sure that we are both getting 100% pleasure no matter what position we are in.

Thanks everyone!

 

[Que]

Threesome with a bisexual top is called for here!

Seriously- it may 'feel' kind of fake at first to be the assetive one but since you know he wants to be topped, it will go better than you think. he can kind of meet you halfway by topping from the bottom, as you I suppose bottom from the top.

 

[LucyH]

Hi All,

My boyfriend and I are in a fairly new relationship, still exploring things with each other, but one thing is certain: we BOTH want to be submissive. We're both comfortable switching roles back and forth, but I have never been in the position of power and I'm totally lost.

I need tips on how to gain confidence in this new position. How to assert myself and how to make sure that we are both getting 100% pleasure no matter what position we are in.

Thanks everyone!

Remember the golden rule: treat others the way you would like to be treated.

 

[MizCreatrix]

It will take a little time and practice, but it absolutely can be done and done well. Its common for many women to feel more comfortable in the submissive role, but truth is, being a domme is a lot of fun! It helps that you have a supportive boyfriend to "practice on" too.

Question for you: Is the goal that you top him in the bedroom only? Or are you both looking at developing a more consistent power-exchange dynamic?

The confidence will develop as you practice a bit and learn to feel more at ease in a dominant role. Best advice I can give is remember not to take it all *too* seriously. You're going to goof-up, you may stumble around at first, but always try to have fun and remember to laugh when things don't quite go as planned.

Good luck!

 

[oneguy4fun]

It's one of those things that the more you do the more confident you will get. It also helps to openly communicate with him. Find out what types of things he likes and what are his limits. Give him an assignment to write you a letter afterward about how he felt during the session. This will help you learn what buttons to push. The more you learn the more confident you will be. Good luck.

 

[amofiga]

I once had a woman who usually a sub tell me that it takes a good sub to know how to be a good dom and vice versa. She had the insight to play it both ways. Being able to see the world from both sides in any area of life makes you a better, more informed, tolerant, and broadminded individual. For me, unfortunately, I have a very tough time putting myself in a sub role even though I've tried. It just doesn't do it for me.

 

[Love2Lust]

Thank you so much for your advice everyone! Brilliant stuff here. We do keep all of our play a roles strictly in the bedroom and so far things are going very well!