Im scared and full of guilt

[mrbimystery]

i had sex with a man last night. in the moment of passion, we did it bareback. now im sooo scared that i have caught something. i never wanna do that again. that, mixed with the guilt, is killing me right now. I still feel guilty of my sexual desires with men. it eats me up inside. i wonder what would happened if my friends and family found out. i also feel so alone because they dont know and dont know the real me. i need make changes in my life. but im just soooo scared and guilty right now. i need a hug.

 

[Nimbikarana]

go see a dr and get yourself checked out. then worry about the rest.

 

[mrbimystery]

go see a dr and get yourself checked out. then worry about the rest.

dont i have to wait 6 months for it to appear anyways?

 

[Nimbikarana]

then you'd better get on with it. and at least you'll know you haven't picked up anything else

 

[ProfBoxers]

dont i have to wait 6 months for it to appear anyways?

Any disease will be present in your blood pretty quickly, so it's best not to wait.

As far as your friends and family, I suggest finding someone, anyone you can trust to get some of your thoughts and feelings out. I know it can help to come here and get some advice, but none of us can speak and listen as well as someone you know.

You aren't alone in your desires.

I'm not the best person to offer advice, since I've told few people of my interests, and never acted on them, but I'm sure there is someone you can talk to.

 

[Fmature2play]

Disease not withstanding, perhaps this will help bring clarity to you and your desires for an alt lifestyle. Please please please do go to your doctor immediately and if not at least go to a clinic. If you are disease free (let's all hope so) I am guessing you have learned a very valuable lesson regarding safe sex. As to the emotional side of things that is going to require some soul searching and honesty. Two tough subjects to tackle yes, but the end result is well worth it.

 

[janeyruth]

i had sex with a man last night. in the moment of passion, we did it bareback. now im sooo scared that i have caught something. i never wanna do that again. that, mixed with the guilt, is killing me right now. I still feel guilty of my sexual desires with men. it eats me up inside. i wonder what would happened if my friends and family found out. i also feel so alone because they dont know and dont know the real me. i need make changes in my life. but im just soooo scared and guilty right now. i need a hug.

No hugs here! You sound like a dude (small d) who has no business taking a walk on the wild side. To paraphrase Dean Wormer, "Scared and guilty is no way to go through life, son." Stick to fuckbooks and Mary Fivefingers.

And if you test positive, I suggest you buy a "I Did a Really Stupid Thing" teeshirt and start wearing it.

And by the way, don't assume your family and friends don't know. Straight people aren't as stupid as gay men think they are...

 

[stude_cruiser19]

I can understand the absence of protection ' in the heat of passion'/ and I agree with many of the others that you should go to a dr, you can say that you came in contact with another person, you dont have to go into all the details about your one-nighter, but they can run a full screen, just to be safe. As for you mental state, find someone to talk with, either a professional therapist, or just a good friend, and let out all your emotions. dont keep it bottled up inside you.

 

[Etoile]

Any disease will be present in your blood pretty quickly, so it's best not to wait.

Actually, this is not correct. The OP is right: HIV can hide for up to 6 months before showing up on a test. That doesn't mean it always does, however. The best thing to do is get tested now, and then again in 6 months. That's really the only way to be certain any new partner is safe - just saying "have you been tested" and then switching to bareback isn't safe. Always do tests 6 months apart.

 

[StacyCD39]

I wholeheartedly concur with everyone here. Get yourself tested, then get yourself into therapy. DO NOT bottle this up inside, it will eat you alive.

I truly hope that you find the help you need.

 

[PressNightly]

Wow janey, way to be completely heartless.....

You've never acted on the heat of the moment, you've never been confused, you've never done anything you regret?

Congratulations you get an award for being perfect!



To the OP, everyone does things they're not proud of, everyone makes mistakes, first thing is to make sure that your health issues are dealt with, get tested NOW, then you can start figuring out why you feel the way you do.

If you need someone to talk to about anything, I'm always available via PM.

 

[Seamen]

Now, how would you describe this person you had sex with? Was he a user? What does he do for a living? Surely the more responsible he is, the less the chance that he has something dangerous. But, he did go bareback with you, and so there is a chance that he does this sort of thing often.

There is no need to cry over spilled milk (!) I'd say; what's done is done. Can you contact this person and ask him if he has something?


Better than cure is prevention,
but comes a close second early detection.

 

[MOral4couple]

If you are truly worried, waste no time in getting to a doctor. You may be given a month's medication called a "triple cocktail" that will knock the shit out of you, but if you start it right away can prevent infection. And don't have unprotected sex again unless you are utterly sure your partner is safe.

 

[stude_cruiser19]

Now, how would you describe this person you had sex with? Was he a user? What does he do for a living? Surely the more responsible he is, the less the chance that he has something dangerous. But, he did go bareback with you, and so there is a chance that he does this sort of thing often.

There is no need to cry over spilled milk (!) I'd say; what's done is done. Can you contact this person and ask him if he has something?


Better than cure is prevention,
but comes a close second early detection.

now thats what i called practicing safety, putting on a condom while typing in the boards. But I do think that you have to have actual contact to catch something, std are not transmitted over the net

 

[Seamen]

std are not transmitted over the net

My computer's constantly getting infected by viruses ; I don't want to catch something just because I wasn't careful, you know ...

 

[haurni]

Visit your local public health/STD clinic as they'll be able to give you all the information you need. There are different types of tests, which have different requirements and different wait times (you may need to wait a few months after possible exposure to get a good assessment).

 

[janeyruth]

Don't forget to get a rabies shot. Maybe it was a gay werewolf who fucked you.

gay werewolf

 

[smoohtie7722]

there's usually free clinics around where you can be tested discreetly