Guys....just give it up already...

[1HornyViking]

On a daily basis, dozens of men like myself, leave threads on this site seeking a little online female companionship. And most, like myself, get few or no responses in return. Obviously the ratio of women to men on this site is a big part of why this happens, but I also think most women on here aren't necessarily looking for the same thing as their male counterparts.

Bottom line guys: you might get lucky, but don't count on it. This site is more for writers, readers, and those that like to lurk.

It's just sad to see all these lonely guys wasting their time, day after day.

Do yourself a big favor, and give it up. Just some friendly advice.

Most of the women on here are from Venus anyway. I'm strictly a martian.

 

[TheLM]

You are largely correct, but I made a couple good friends from my own thread so I can't say it was all in vain.... (For some odd reason the mods decided to move that topic to another forum where it was promptly buried, but whatever)

At least women get responses on here.

 

[1HornyViking]

No kidding...

I've been tempted more then once or twice to pretend I was a woman. But, I couldn't lower myself to that...lol.

How nice it would be to have your message box flooded with PM's each and every day, with everyone asking for your time and affection, and being able to pick and choose who you wanted to reply to. Women have it so much better.

 

[handsfree6969]

Basically agree but on the other hand it is like anything else. Most people have already made their connections and have their circles -- it's natural. I have made a couple connections (one I really like -- she keeps me coming back). Other than that, lots of lite stuff, fun posts, some great personal pics, some fun lite chats, etc.

I imagine with the men/women ratio, women are so inundated with PMs anytime they give the slightest hint they may be interested in something that it is ridiculous. I will rarely PM a woman because of that and I never expect a response -- so when I get one, it is appreciated.

 

[gt23669]

Not necessarily. I have posted my first thread and as you stated before, got little to no responses by the many wonderful women on this site. I did get on message from a guy asking if I was interested but to his dismay, I said no lol. BUT, I wasn't discouraged.

I made a new thread, this time speaking like a normal, educated guy. Of course I stated that I was still 18yrs old and I still am now but the point is, when I started that second thread, I had and still get messages from different women on here.

Really, it all depends on how the guy approaches the subject and not talked like a uneducated idiot as I have seen many people do. "Hey I LOVE boobs and would LOVE to see yours!!!" - this being a made up example but a perfect one. I have seen threads like this many times and have seen it only work once. Even though he got some replies, the thread didn't last long at all.

I learned from the mistakes of other guys and instead of just advertising for sex, I got to know the fine women here on Lit. If you look, I made a thread that lets students 18-23 post and let people know they are here.

Most guys just don't know how to ask right. Most of us do just fine and like you said, its best not to expect anything to happen but to increase your chances of getting a good response is to be patient, ask nicely, and don't sound like an idiot haha

 

[its_all_good_123]

he has a point

Horny viking has a point. I'm a woman, and whenever I make a post I get flooded with PM. I guess a guy has to stand out. The PM's are insane, and hard to wade through, but have made some great connections and friends on here

 

[LucyN]

Some good points. Yes the PM box might get inundated with messages that were just made to delete.

You can also have a fun thread that disappears elsewhere. Hey ho, maybe not all of us are to be experts in Literotica, that's the choice of whoever runs this site.

It might surprise some guys to know that there are probably quite a few ordinary girls on here, not wanting to cam or whatever, but just enjoy a little time on the internet and who give you the same reaction as we would on a night out if you approached us in the way that some do on here.

Probably wasn't worth saying, but I said it anyway.

 

[Direblanketman]

I realised long ago I would always be forever alone.

 

[JSensei]

I don't come round these parts as much anymore, but every now and again, I pop in to see what's happening.

I'm just going to be honest with you. Personals is a bit of a meat market, and most of the meat on display is sausage. That is NOT to say you can't get some good responses from a well written personal. You can. Or you can be the kind of person that sits in the shadows and lurks and snipes every person that claims to be female.

Or how about a third option? Go to another board. Make friends. Try the playground. Start playing some thread games. Meet people. Interested in BDSM? Try their boards. There are threads for whatever interests you.

I went from 200 posts in 2 years to 2000 posts in two weeks after joining the Playground. I now have SEVERAL friends that I chat with regularly. They are all likeminded individuals that also have an interest in sex. Make some friends, and you can have pretty much any kind of chat you want, from PG chats to some so hot it will steam up the NEIGHBOR'S windows.

Or I guess you can just bemoan the situation on Personals. Whichever suits your fancy.

 

[WickedLittleBoy]

I guess a guy has to stand out.

This is absolutely essential.

If you're a guy and you post a generic personal ad, you're probably not going to get any responses - except maybe from dudes who are so desperate for cyber action they're willing to pretend they're chicks. If you post a great ad, one that's detailed and shows some of your charm and humor and intellect, but you're not someone who's been active on the forum, then you'll still likely only get a few women reply to it. Basically, if you want any hope of garnering attention from women, you need to stand out, and that means covering your bases:

1. Be active on the board. Posts matter. Firstly, they put your name out there and establish you as more than just a cock looking for a hole. Second, the threads you post in and the sort of comments you make help establish your character by showcasing your personality, interests, sense of humor, intelligence, kinks and charm. If a woman feels like she knows you a little, she'll be more comfortable with sending you a PM, because she'll be less concerned that you'll interpret her message as sexual aggressiveness and an invitation to cyber.

2. Fill out your damn profile! Seriously. Most men don't bother reading profiles, but women absolutely do. If you manage to intrigue a woman online, she's going to want to know more about you. So it's in your best interest to share some basic personal details, like a general idea of where you reside, your age, your marital status, and those hobbies/interests that you enjoy. And, again, if you can interject some personality, some humor in your profile, you'll score major points. And while it's fine to mention some of your sexual kinks, fetishes or interests, you should probably say something more substantial in your profile than "I love tittyfucking and getting my dick sucked by horny sluts!" Unless, of course, your goal is to ensure you don't have to waste time pretending to be interested in anything other than sex, and you're hoping to win the lottery by finding that one woman who has no other purpose on the board than to service the sexual needs of every swingin' dick she comes across.

3. Pictures. Soon as you're able, get yourself an avatar. In the meantime, use a profile picture. Doesn't have to be a personal photo - though, it wouldn't hurt - but, like your posts and your profile, it should say something about you. Though, if all you have to say about yourself is "I have a big dick!" then be prepared to immediately reduce the number of PMs you'll receive. Women care about more than cocks. Shocking, I know, but true. A sweet smile or a silly face will get you more attention than the old "Check out my massive flesh obelisk" photo.

4. A personal ad with flair. Once you've made yourself a known commodity on the board, posting across various forums and in myriad threads, then you can consider posting your personal ad. And, when you do, put some effort into it. Seriously, why would any woman bother replying to the lamest, most generic of ads that merely requests women of X age, in X area, for X activities? Yeah, describe the sort of woman you're hoping to talk to or meet, but don't reduce her to stats. Similarly, describe yourself beyond the meager date of age, height, weight, and location. Expand on your profile. Exercise a little creative flair and make yourself interesting, alluring, and ultimately irresistible.

You get back what you put in. If you make only the minimal effort to try and win the attention of Lit ladies, you're probably not going to get a huge response. And rightly so. If you can't bother, why should they?

 

[gt23669]

For someone only 18 (really?) gt23669 offers some real wisdom. I actually enjoyed reading his entire post. If I were a female. . .

If you put yourself out there, give people something tangible to explore, it really helps make a connection from your post at Literotica to a real, live, living and breathing person.

It has really helped me. My blog is rather focused and won't appeal to as broad a range of people as yours would. Give it some thought. You might be surprised. Having a site that allows you to present yourself in something other than a few lines of text offers huge benefits.

Haha yes I really am 18yrs old. Though I may be young, I am more mature then I should be. But that doesn't negate my ability to have fun

I do agree with the points L1NGUS has made. I often find my self, looking at the profile information of a person that messages me and all I really find is little to nothing at all. Guys, fill out your profile information more and not with just, "so and so guy from somewhere looking for hot sexy chick to chat and cam with." Give something that a person can read and get a feel for. Women, I haven't really seen a whole lot of indecent profile information but there are some women out there that has typed information that will only attract the douche-bags as well as the rude ones as well.

LucyN as well as every other women has experienced, has an inbox that is instantly flooded with messages from guys offering them selves or responding to a post a women has made looking for a good time. This is an unfortunate thing for all of the guys out there that are actually nice and NOT rude or just retarded (No offense to any of the guys).

To all the lovely women out there, some advice when searching through all the messages you receive, don't open it and just start reading it. Look at the subject line first. If you read it and think its from someone that has some sort of sense, then open it and read on.

 

[gt23669]

WickedLittleBoy beat me to the punch but I agree with everything he said.

 

[LetForeverBe]

If you make your generic "Cock on cam free cam show" thread, you're not gonna get much. Guys on cam are a dime a dozen. Have something a bit unique/fresh to bring to the table, or something unique that someone else might appreciate, such as a particular fetish, or fantasy, or at least show some intelligence. I don't get flooded with women, but I get enough contacting me to make it all worthwhile.

 

[XenoMorph]

I doubt all the above
is the manner and what every man focus to
if u wanna cum ,then u posibly end alone cumming.....
its all about target

 

[Iamnotthe1]

good to know this.

 

[mark197205]

I don't come round these parts as much anymore, but every now and again, I pop in to see what's happening.

I'm just going to be honest with you. Personals is a bit of a meat market, and most of the meat on display is sausage. That is NOT to say you can't get some good responses from a well written personal. You can. Or you can be the kind of person that sits in the shadows and lurks and snipes every person that claims to be female.

Or how about a third option? Go to another board. Make friends. Try the playground. Start playing some thread games. Meet people. Interested in BDSM? Try their boards. There are threads for whatever interests you.

I went from 200 posts in 2 years to 2000 posts in two weeks after joining the Playground. I now have SEVERAL friends that I chat with regularly. They are all likeminded individuals that also have an interest in sex. Make some friends, and you can have pretty much any kind of chat you want, from PG chats to some so hot it will steam up the NEIGHBOR'S windows.

Or I guess you can just bemoan the situation on Personals. Whichever suits your fancy.

Well said.

 

[Scarlett_GA]

This is absolutely essential.

If you're a guy and you post a generic personal ad, you're probably not going to get any responses - except maybe from dudes who are so desperate for cyber action they're willing to pretend they're chicks. If you post a great ad, one that's detailed and shows some of your charm and humor and intellect, but you're not someone who's been active on the forum, then you'll still likely only get a few women reply to it. Basically, if you want any hope of garnering attention from women, you need to stand out, and that means covering your bases:

1. Be active on the board. Posts matter. Firstly, they put your name out there and establish you as more than just a cock looking for a hole. Second, the threads you post in and the sort of comments you make help establish your character by showcasing your personality, interests, sense of humor, intelligence, kinks and charm. If a woman feels like she knows you a little, she'll be more comfortable with sending you a PM, because she'll be less concerned that you'll interpret her message as sexual aggressiveness and an invitation to cyber.

2. Fill out your damn profile! Seriously. Most men don't bother reading profiles, but women absolutely do. If you manage to intrigue a woman online, she's going to want to know more about you. So it's in your best interest to share some basic personal details, like a general idea of where you reside, your age, your marital status, and those hobbies/interests that you enjoy. And, again, if you can interject some personality, some humor in your profile, you'll score major points. And while it's fine to mention some of your sexual kinks, fetishes or interests, you should probably say something more substantial in your profile than "I love tittyfucking and getting my dick sucked by horny sluts!" Unless, of course, your goal is to ensure you don't have to waste time pretending to be interested in anything other than sex, and you're hoping to win the lottery by finding that one woman who has no other purpose on the board than to service the sexual needs of every swingin' dick she comes across.

3. Pictures. Soon as you're able, get yourself an avatar. In the meantime, use a profile picture. Doesn't have to be a personal photo - though, it wouldn't hurt - but, like your posts and your profile, it should say something about you. Though, if all you have to say about yourself is "I have a big dick!" then be prepared to immediately reduce the number of PMs you'll receive. Women care about more than cocks. Shocking, I know, but true. A sweet smile or a silly face will get you more attention than the old "Check out my massive flesh obelisk" photo.

4. A personal ad with flair. Once you've made yourself a known commodity on the board, posting across various forums and in myriad threads, then you can consider posting your personal ad. And, when you do, put some effort into it. Seriously, why would any woman bother replying to the lamest, most generic of ads that merely requests women of X age, in X area, for X activities? Yeah, describe the sort of woman you're hoping to talk to or meet, but don't reduce her to stats. Similarly, describe yourself beyond the meager date of age, height, weight, and location. Expand on your profile. Exercise a little creative flair and make yourself interesting, alluring, and ultimately irresistible.

You get back what you put in. If you make only the minimal effort to try and win the attention of Lit ladies, you're probably not going to get a huge response. And rightly so. If you can't bother, why should they?

Quoted for truth! Excellent post.

The only thing I would add is this: Guys, in addition to getting some meaningful posts on the board and filling out your profile at least somewhat, try reading and paying attention to what a woman posts in HER profile. Maybe it's just me, but I immediately get turned off if you ask me something as simple as, "Where are you from?" It tells me A. you cannot read, or B. you don't give a shit enough to look over to the left and see my location. Either way you slice it, both are extremely unattractive qualities to me.

While you're there, try reading what's in a woman's profile or peruse her posts to determine if you've got anything in common or find something you can use to strike up a conversation. Sometimes it actually works. Really.

 

[QSco]

Quoted for truth! Excellent post.

The only thing I would add is this: Guys, in addition to getting some meaningful posts on the board and filling out your profile at least somewhat, try reading and paying attention to what a woman posts in HER profile. Maybe it's just me, but I immediately get turned off if you ask me something as simple as, "Where are you from?" It tells me A. you cannot read, or B. you don't give a shit enough to look over to the left and see my location. Either way you slice it, both are extremely unattractive qualities to me.

While you're there, try reading what's in a woman's profile or peruse her posts to determine if you've got anything in common or find something you can use to strike up a conversation. Sometimes it actually works. Really.

What? Women enjoy .... conversation?? Women who frequent an "erotic literature" board enjoy men who can read?

 

[nwnnguy]

OR, be a smartass

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=779605

 

[QSco]

OR, be a smartass

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=779605

Like.

 

[stude_cruiser19]

why they can't tell ' where are you from' ?

I have a third possibility as to why some might ask this question, id addition to those two that you just proposed
C. It is somewhat difficult to move the mouse over a profile and click on it, if theat person has one hand in their lap, and it is active. Since most people cannot truly multi-task, it makes it easier for them to just ask, as opposed to changing hands, and clicking through a profile

nyuck nyuck nyuck

 

[sereneone4u]

Not necessarily. I have posted my first thread and as you stated before, got little to no responses by the many wonderful women on this site. I did get on message from a guy asking if I was interested but to his dismay, I said no lol. BUT, I wasn't discouraged.

I made a new thread, this time speaking like a normal, educated guy. Of course I stated that I was still 18yrs old and I still am now but the point is, when I started that second thread, I had and still get messages from different women on here.

Really, it all depends on how the guy approaches the subject and not talked like a uneducated idiot as I have seen many people do. "Hey I LOVE boobs and would LOVE to see yours!!!" - this being a made up example but a perfect one. I have seen threads like this many times and have seen it only work once. Even though he got some replies, the thread didn't last long at all.

I learned from the mistakes of other guys and instead of just advertising for sex, I got to know the fine women here on Lit. If you look, I made a thread that lets students 18-23 post and let people know they are here.

Most guys just don't know how to ask right. Most of us do just fine and like you said, its best not to expect anything to happen but to increase your chances of getting a good response is to be patient, ask nicely, and don't sound like an idiot haha

I don't come round these parts as much anymore, but every now and again, I pop in to see what's happening.

I'm just going to be honest with you. Personals is a bit of a meat market, and most of the meat on display is sausage. That is NOT to say you can't get some good responses from a well written personal. You can. Or you can be the kind of person that sits in the shadows and lurks and snipes every person that claims to be female.

Or how about a third option? Go to another board. Make friends. Try the playground. Start playing some thread games. Meet people. Interested in BDSM? Try their boards. There are threads for whatever interests you.

I went from 200 posts in 2 years to 2000 posts in two weeks after joining the Playground. I now have SEVERAL friends that I chat with regularly. They are all likeminded individuals that also have an interest in sex. Make some friends, and you can have pretty much any kind of chat you want, from PG chats to some so hot it will steam up the NEIGHBOR'S windows.

Or I guess you can just bemoan the situation on Personals. Whichever suits your fancy.

This is absolutely essential.

If you're a guy and you post a generic personal ad, you're probably not going to get any responses - except maybe from dudes who are so desperate for cyber action they're willing to pretend they're chicks. If you post a great ad, one that's detailed and shows some of your charm and humor and intellect, but you're not someone who's been active on the forum, then you'll still likely only get a few women reply to it. Basically, if you want any hope of garnering attention from women, you need to stand out, and that means covering your bases:

1. Be active on the board. Posts matter. Firstly, they put your name out there and establish you as more than just a cock looking for a hole. Second, the threads you post in and the sort of comments you make help establish your character by showcasing your personality, interests, sense of humor, intelligence, kinks and charm. If a woman feels like she knows you a little, she'll be more comfortable with sending you a PM, because she'll be less concerned that you'll interpret her message as sexual aggressiveness and an invitation to cyber.

2. Fill out your damn profile! Seriously. Most men don't bother reading profiles, but women absolutely do. If you manage to intrigue a woman online, she's going to want to know more about you. So it's in your best interest to share some basic personal details, like a general idea of where you reside, your age, your marital status, and those hobbies/interests that you enjoy. And, again, if you can interject some personality, some humor in your profile, you'll score major points. And while it's fine to mention some of your sexual kinks, fetishes or interests, you should probably say something more substantial in your profile than "I love tittyfucking and getting my dick sucked by horny sluts!" Unless, of course, your goal is to ensure you don't have to waste time pretending to be interested in anything other than sex, and you're hoping to win the lottery by finding that one woman who has no other purpose on the board than to service the sexual needs of every swingin' dick she comes across.

3. Pictures. Soon as you're able, get yourself an avatar. In the meantime, use a profile picture. Doesn't have to be a personal photo - though, it wouldn't hurt - but, like your posts and your profile, it should say something about you. Though, if all you have to say about yourself is "I have a big dick!" then be prepared to immediately reduce the number of PMs you'll receive. Women care about more than cocks. Shocking, I know, but true. A sweet smile or a silly face will get you more attention than the old "Check out my massive flesh obelisk" photo.

4. A personal ad with flair. Once you've made yourself a known commodity on the board, posting across various forums and in myriad threads, then you can consider posting your personal ad. And, when you do, put some effort into it. Seriously, why would any woman bother replying to the lamest, most generic of ads that merely requests women of X age, in X area, for X activities? Yeah, describe the sort of woman you're hoping to talk to or meet, but don't reduce her to stats. Similarly, describe yourself beyond the meager date of age, height, weight, and location. Expand on your profile. Exercise a little creative flair and make yourself interesting, alluring, and ultimately irresistible.

You get back what you put in. If you make only the minimal effort to try and win the attention of Lit ladies, you're probably not going to get a huge response. And rightly so. If you can't bother, why should they?

Excellent, excellent advice.

 

[Semler]

Good advice and I'm sure it will help, but face the facts, there are not enough women here.

Also, it's not always the guys fault. Don't blame it all on the lack of a profile or poorly written PM, some women here are just as rude and unmannerly as the men.

Literotica needs more women!

 

[Fmature2play]

Hey I'm a gal and I wish there were more of us on Lit.

 

[gt23669]

Good advice and I'm sure it will help, but face the facts, there are not enough women here.

Also, it's not always the guys fault. Don't blame it all on the lack of a profile or poorly written PM, some women here are just as rude and unmannerly as the men.

Literotica needs more women!

Honestly, your probably right, but I have yet to run into any women like this. I have talked with many women of different types and such but I haven't any be rude to me at all. Some women just stop messaging back but that doesn't mean they are rude. They could just be no longer interested in it.

True, the ratio of women to men is probably like 1/20 but a majority of the guys on here (no offense to any of them, just making a point) are just..like..rude. I don't know how to explain it any better. They get right down to the point, while that's not a big problem, it just doesn't really attract allot of the women that are on Lit. Most are simple minded with only one goal when the log onto Lit and that is to get off. While this is fine, most women don't go for it. I cant really take up what they really want or think, but I'm guessing most of the women on here want a little more then just a quick "cyber fuck".

Then again, most women will be rude to the other person if the other say stuff like "Hey, I saw your picture and I thought you were pretty hot! Mind if I can see more of that sexy body?" or "Hey let me see your tits" or "Hey your so fucking hot I just wanna stuff this big hard cock down your throat" or something of the sort. I mean really, if you were in the girls position, and saw the guys doing these things, would you want to respond to any of their posts?

Most of the time..if not all the time, it's the guys fault in real life, and most likely, its the guys fault this time as well haha lol

No hate, just throwing my two cents in haha