Exploration of Pain

[vintage63]

Hello everyone,

Yes I have another pain question So as I mentioned before I have a very low pain tolerance. Having said that it's something I want to explore because I think I react more to the emotional aspect of pain than the pain itself.

So far I have only been spanked with my Masters hand and we want to try more things. Now I know from reading posts here that people like different kinds on pain so different toys .. some paddles, some whips. My question is if I was going to start exploring slowly, aside from the obvious of don't hit hard, what toys might hurt less that others. Right now in my mind they all look painful but I love spanking when done right and I never thought I would.

Thanks

 

[RJMasters]

when done right

I think this is a key part.

Pain is something we all process on an individual level. For some, stimulation is needed first to open the door for enjoyment of pain, whereas some use pain as a means to open the door for pleasure. In my expereince, I often see the acceptance or more tolerance for more pain when sexual excitement or arousal is in full swing. Perhaps because of the endorphin release or just the wild excitement of letting go.

In addition to looking for additional toys to experiment with different types of sensation of pain, you might encourage your partner to take things up a notch when the moment is right see what works for you. Change it up a bit to see what works for you.

As an example, nipple play can be very sensitive at the beginning and often calls for a lighter touch or tweak when building arousal, whereas when arousal is in full swing, sometimes I wonder if I might rip a nipple off and I still hear calls for harder or more. I find my partner to be wonderiously strange that way.

There is no toy that can subsitute a partner getting to know what pushes your buttons.

That said, there are some toys that can push buttons really nicely when held in the hand of someone who can read you and know when, where and how hard to push, pull and smack.

 

[ImOnIt]

Hello everyone,

I have a very low pain tolerance.

Hows your fitness and overall health? I've found pain feels better when I'm fitter.

 

[bhndblueyes88]

I don't really have any answers for you, as I only have experience with hands, crop and the melted end of a nylon rope (totally wasn't expecting THAT at the time XD). But I do look forward to seeing what other people put, as I've been interested in prodding my bf to pick up a leather flogger.

 

[vintage63]

Hows your fitness and overall health? I've found pain feels better when I'm fitter.

I am pretty fit so we are ok there.

 

[NomadLady]

I think this is a key part.

Pain is something we all process on an individual level. For some, stimulation is needed first to open the door for enjoyment of pain, whereas some use pain as a means to open the door for pleasure. In my expereince, I often see the acceptance or more tolerance for more pain when sexual excitement or arousal is in full swing. Perhaps because of the endorphin release or just the wild excitement of letting go.

In addition to looking for additional toys to experiment with different types of sensation of pain, you might encourage your partner to take things up a notch when the moment is right see what works for you. Change it up a bit to see what works for you.

As an example, nipple play can be very sensitive at the beginning and often calls for a lighter touch or tweak when building arousal, whereas when arousal is in full swing, sometimes I wonder if I might rip a nipple off and I still hear calls for harder or more. I find my partner to be wonderiously strange that way.

There is no toy that can subsitute a partner getting to know what pushes your buttons.

That said, there are some toys that can push buttons really nicely when held in the hand of someone who can read you and know when, where and how hard to push, pull and smack.

In total agreement with RJMasters here....the more aroused I am the higher my pain tolerance as well. I think after you've explored all you can with hands and as far as a "lighter" toy goes, a flogger is a very good choice because the sensation can be quite soft or hard depending on the person weilding it. I find they are a very versatile toy in that regard.

 

[vintage63]

Thank you RJMasters and Nomadlady. I am excited, albeit nervous to explore. I think Master and I will be having long conversations.

 

[redslady]

I've found I can handle the thuddy pain far better then the kind that stings. Paddles and the wide strap are wonderful but the belt or flogger, they make me cry uncle real fast. In fact, the flogger has now been designated a punishment tool since the sight of it makes me cringe.

 

[NomadLady]

Vintage, also be mindful that due to the hormonal changes a woman goes through during the month you will probably find your pain tolerance change. Also if you aren't "mentally" in a good space your tolerance can change drastically as well. Any type physical illness can sometimes render your pain tolerance pretty much at zero so being sick isn't usually a good time to test boundaries.

Since a session can be a great sense of stress relief for me, I find that my tolerance level can be higher when I'm stressed out. The good thing about that is the wonderful calming effect that lingers after an intense session where my limits are tested and pushed. Even days later the bruising can be a pleasant reminder of learning experience.

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

Vintage, also be mindful that due to the hormonal changes a woman goes through during the month you will probably find your pain tolerance change. Also if you aren't "mentally" in a good space your tolerance can change drastically as well.

Both very very good points that make things very bloody difficult.

I'll also tack on physical comfort, otherwise. My tolerance levels plummet if I'm otherwise uncomfortable, like my toes are cold, or my knee is itchy, or sitting/standing/lying a certain way is uncomfortable, or if I'm bound, there's something uneven about the bondage.

But I might just be weird.

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

Also, it could pay to invest in some implements that give very different sensations, depending on how they are used.

Like, the crop (and I'm sure the others might know what else) you can get light stings, heavier stings, or a solid crack with the shaft. Using something like that, you can toy around with the lighter things first, and build intensity as you get comfy, or simply mix things up so no one thing becomes too overwhelming too quickly, whichever would work better for your brain.

And yes, I mean your brain. That's where you process your pain. You'll find different techniques have different effects emotionally. Since you find yourself responding to the emotional part of it, you need to explore a few paths, and find the one that works best for you.

RJ said it better in the first part of his post. Dinfferent people need it in different ways. If you *do* need it (and there's nothing wrong with you if you don't) then you just need to find the way that works for you.

 

[SimonBrooke]

Hello everyone,

Yes I have another pain question So as I mentioned before I have a very low pain tolerance. Having said that it's something I want to explore because I think I react more to the emotional aspect of pain than the pain itself.

So far I have only been spanked with my Masters hand and we want to try more things. Now I know from reading posts here that people like different kinds on pain so different toys .. some paddles, some whips. My question is if I was going to start exploring slowly, aside from the obvious of don't hit hard, what toys might hurt less that others. Right now in my mind they all look painful but I love spanking when done right and I never thought I would.

Thanks

I recently started playing with a woman who had never been hit before, and noticed that all the hitty things in my armoury were pretty severe. So I went out and got a silk rope flogger and a lightweight suede flogger.

The silk flogger will not hurt anyone, but it is arousing and interesting on the skin. The suede flogger can be used to hurt, but doesn't have to be. Whereas a tawse or a riding crop or a paddle or a single-tail whip is pretty much bound to hurt, and if used properly is going to hurt a lot.

 

[vintage63]

I recently started playing with a woman who had never been hit before, and noticed that all the hitty things in my armoury were pretty severe. So I went out and got a silk rope flogger and a lightweight suede flogger.

The silk flogger will not hurt anyone, but it is arousing and interesting on the skin. The suede flogger can be used to hurt, but doesn't have to be. Whereas a tawse or a riding crop or a paddle or a single-tail whip is pretty much bound to hurt, and if used properly is going to hurt a lot.

Taking notes here ......

 

[refitist]

bastinado

but I love spanking when done right and I never thought I would.

Thanks

quite often it isn't that much the tool used. it's rather a question on
where to apply that tool. a cane or ruler are surely a fierce means,

yet applied to the soles of your feet this may be an exiting experience
you may be able to bear. if carried out by a skilled person, knowing
exactly about the more (middlefoot, inner side, toes) and less (balls)
sensitive zones of the feet, five to ten good lashes will do for a
novice.

if carried out workmanlike you'll enjoy some flashback of the ache
later on that very day without promonition.

the bruises will remain unseen. thus nobody will know why you walk
that nicely deliberate on painfull soles - nobody but your master.

http://70.32.109.64/sites/default/files/imagecache/gallery_main/recommendations/photos/bastinado.jpg



a refitist, who'd like to see you walk in high heels and dance the
night away. on your sore soles after this.

 

[cromsgirl]

I am the opposite of redlady. I much prefer the stingy pain to the thuddy.

Our first toy was a little plastic flogger we bought at a sex shop. It was really stingy when we started using it, but as we got more into things, my tolerence went up. It is now barely a warm up toy.

We made a leather flogger out of 1/4 inch laces and a braided nylon rope flogger. We also have a ridding crop, a 1/4 inch dowel, and a bamboo back scratcher. We recently acquired a home made cedar "ruler" that a friend made and gave to us, but we haven't had a chance to use it yet.

None of this has done anything to my pain tolerance outside of a scene.

 

[Kwing]

I think I read somewhere that deerskin floggers are quite gentle. You might want to look into those.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Good thing to remember too is there are countless items from around the house you can use to deliver pain before buying the more expensive items and finding pain is not your friend. You can try candles, egg slides (amazing how much one of those plastic ones can hurt on the wrong day), wooden bread boards, clothes pins/pegs, wet bath towel looped and wielded as a flogging implement, tacks, insect zappers, alligator clips, workshop clamps, wire brushes, ruler, wallpaper strippers, hairbrush, rubber bands....and the list goes on. Enjoy exploring.

Catalina

 

[Stella_Omega]

I think I read somewhere that deerskin floggers are quite gentle. You might want to look into those.

A top can throw their elbow out trying to make an impression with a deerskin flogger.

I tend to buy heavier toys than lighter. You can always hit light with a heavy toy, but you can't hit heavy with a light toy. I have an elkhide flogger for soft thuddyness, nearly two feet of streamers. If I swing the whole length it can whomp the breath right out of you. But I can grab the streamers about a foot from the ends and use that alone to brush, or tickle, or tap. My hard-edged bull-hide flogger, similarly...


I also recommend paddles. They don't have to be swung at full force, and there are times when a spanking will bruise the top's hands long before it bother's the bottom!

 

[Dearelliot]

my icelandic Mistress introduced me to needles a long time ago, and used correctly they do so motivate. She would bring in a stainless steel tray off implements on a white towel...and place it before me, asking me questions as she set out the instruments...the ritual was as exciting as the final performance

 

[radepor]

Proportion and scaling

How many vote for "shock and awe"?

How many vote for "recon, then penetrate"?

The obvious order is obvious, or is it?

my icelandic Mistress introduced me to needles a long time ago, and used correctly they do so motivate. She would bring in a stainless steel tray off implements on a white towel...and place it before me, asking me questions as she set out the instruments...the ritual was as exciting as the final performance

 

[fma30f]

hi

In total agreement with RJMasters here....the more aroused I am the higher my pain tolerance as well. I think after you've explored all you can with hands and as far as a "lighter" toy goes, a flogger is a very good choice because the sensation can be quite soft or hard depending on the person weilding it. I find they are a very versatile toy in that regard.

i agree.I have undergone pain induced by cane strokes and i think cane suits my craving perfectly.