The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

[Goldie Munro]

And I get to join the international Flip-flop flinging competition...

I put in a full steak dinner, with baby new potatoes, veg, garlic butter sauce and a fine wine to wash it down with.

and I get to say 'A wafer thin mint?'

I put in a bikini

 

[sacrificedangel]

and I get to say 'A wafer thin mint?'

I put in a bikini

(LMAO I love that MP sketch)

...and I enchant the bikini so that it no longer leaves strap marks when sunbathing

I put in a strawberry flavoured fork.

 

[Handley_Page]

(LMAO I love that MP sketch)

...and I enchant the bikini so that it no longer leaves strap marks when sunbathing

I put in a strawberry flavoured fork.

and it has a argument with the Raspberry knife.

I put in some tanning lotion, factor 42

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and it has a argument with the Raspberry knife.

I put in some tanning lotion, factor 42

and, we climb aboard the QE2 and head for the southern hemisphere.

I put in a palm tree.

 

[sacrificedangel]

and, we climb aboard the QE2 and head for the southern hemisphere.

I put in a palm tree.

And it blows serenly in the vending machine fan

I exchange it for a palm reader.

 

[YoursSINSerely]

And it blows serenly in the vending machine fan

I exchange it for a palm reader.

And, your love line and your life line join to become one.

I put in the Queen of Cups.

 

[Austin8]

And, your love line and your life line join to become one.

I put in the Queen of Cups.

and the King of Queens wants to know. "Whadda ya lookin' at!

I put in a organic paper cup

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and the King of Queens wants to know. "Whadda ya lookin' at!

I put in a organic paper cup

And, the cup is inserted into my next Earth Day story.

I put in a 100% organic cotton sweater one size too small.

 

[Austin8]

And, the cup is inserted into my next Earth Day story.

I put in a 100% organic cotton sweater one size too small.

Looks good on you! put it back on!

I put in a lug nut

 

[YoursSINSerely]

Looks good on you! put it back on!

I put in a lug nut

and, the US Government sees an easy way to raise money and slips a ten dollar tax onto the nine cent lug nut.

I put in a spray can of air.

 

[sacrificedangel]

and, the US Government sees an easy way to raise money and slips a ten dollar tax onto the nine cent lug nut.

I put in a spray can of air.

And I take it with me on my next visit to a big smoggy city

I put in a hug.

 

[YoursSINSerely]

And I take it with me on my next visit to a big smoggy city

I put in a hug.

and, it is difficult for the vending people to put a fair price tag on that item.

I put in a friendly peck on the cheek.

 

[Austin8]

and, it is difficult for the vending people to put a fair price tag on that item.

I put in a friendly peck on the cheek.

and all the shows of affection take place in the break room not in the vending machine

I hold up a key to Bar's front door

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and all the shows of affection take place in the break room not in the vending machine

I hold up a key to Bar's front door

And, cum to find out it's a rear-door entry household.

I put in a smoke alarm.

 

[Tonguemeister]

And, cum to find out it's a rear-door entry household.

I put in a smoke alarm.

and get a latex bedsheet ...

I put in a sense of humour ...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and get a latex bedsheet ...

I put in a sense of humour ...

and, we take off to attend the Blue Men show.

I put in a block of blue cheese.

 

[Handley_Page]

and, we take off to attend the Blue Men show.

I put in a block of blue cheese.

and the sales rep for Green Moon Cheese gets very upset.


I put in a Pink Carnation.

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and the sales rep for Green Moon Cheese gets very upset.


I put in a Pink Carnation.

And, we take off with it in the pickup truck.

I put in a pair of dice.

 

[Austin8]

and the sales rep for Green Moon Cheese gets very upset.


I put in a Pink Carnation.

and you look sharp with it pinned to your lapel

I put in a full body scanner

 

[Handley_Page]

and you look sharp with it pinned to your lapel

I put in a full body scanner

and the result of your tests is that the Dinosaur skull you tested is a fake.

I put in a real body

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and you look sharp with it pinned to your lapel

I put in a full body scanner

So, we sit in court all day waiting for the jury to deliberate on who killed the palm tree last week.

I put in a gavel.

 

[Austin8]

and the result of your tests is that the Dinosaur skull you tested is a fake.

I put in a real body

Yikes! and I up the refrigeration to keep it cool

I put in a swab test to check for any explosive residue

(Morning you Two!)

 

[Handley_Page]

The gavel make an explosive sound, thus destroying any residual evidence and the dead palm tree is put down to "natural causes"

I put in a number of brown envelopes for the jury.

 

[Austin8]

The gavel make an explosive sound, thus destroying any residual evidence and the dead palm tree is put down to "natural causes"

I put in a number of brown envelopes for the jury.

and the results are leaked to the local paper

I put in a row of agates

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and the results are leaked to the local paper

I put in a row of agates

and, I claim them as my own to replace all the marbles I have lost.

I throw in a handful of jacks.