Birth control

[Vielle]

So, just wondering what others think about the birth control issue.

In my sex life, birth control is pretty essential. When I'm not on the pill, he has to use a condom. So, in real life, I always have a conversation about it. But, when I read stories on Literotica, I have never come across any reference to birth control. So, I'm just wondering, why is that?

Do people find birth control to be a turn off?

Personally, I see it as realism.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

You'll find it in my stories, every time! Unless, that is, someone is supposed to be getting pregnant.

 

[slyc_willie]

So, just wondering what others think about the birth control issue.

In my sex life, birth control is pretty essential. When I'm not on the pill, he has to use a condom. So, in real life, I always have a conversation about it. But, when I read stories on Literotica, I have never come across any reference to birth control. So, I'm just wondering, why is that?

Do people find birth control to be a turn off?

Personally, I see it as realism.

I think, for many, the use of a condom in an erotic story is a turn off. Just my opinion. What has become a mortal reality in real life is anathema to the fantasy of wild, spontaneous sex as is often depicted in erotic stories. Plus, as VM pointed out, sometimes pregnancy is part of the story. In addition, the dangerous thrill of having unprotected sex can be immensely arousing.

I have a series on Lit about a young woman who becomes a call girl. I make it a point throughout the story that she has only protected sex with her clients; if I had not made that clear, then the facet of realism would have been irrevocably lost. Still, not everyone has protected sex, and not everyone suffers because of it. The SO and I don't use birth control of any kind, but that is mainly due to other, more personal, issues.

I've seen disclaimers on some Lit stories which stress (paraphrasing): "In my world, there is no danger of STDs, so please don't leave comments about how so-and-so would have died from AIDS by the end of the third chapter." These are only stories, fantasies, and not real-life situations.

 

[xssve]

Coitus interruptus is back - apparently, Onan knew what he was doing.

Now we have an excuse to come all over your tits!

 

[neonlyte]

Coitus interruptus is back - apparently, Onan knew what he was doing.

Now we have an excuse to come all over your tits!

As long as it's not all over my man boobs

As to BC - sometimes yes, sometimes no. It depends upon the scene and how it's playing out. Like RL, it is not always possible to reach for the BC... but 99% of my characters are in relationships where a pregnancy wouldn't be a problem.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I recently came across a science article about ejaculate. Since 1940 the ejaculate of white American males has decreased 50%, that is, half as much sperm and semen. No one knows why, but I suspect white males are sensing and adapting to the low fertility of white women.

If there is a high correlation with homosexual males, then my hypothesis may be correct. White women may be extinguishing themselves with birth control.

But I can make the birth control issue the point of a story, and have a story in mind.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

I don't think any of my stories mention birth control, and yet I had only ever had protected sex before writing most of them. I did make the mistake pf having unprotected sex about two years ago, but that was a one off and hopefully won't kill me...

I feel that it interrupts the flow of my stories to have someone breaking out the condoms. I would only put it in if I wanted the flow to be broken up, and I haven't wanted that yet. Maybe some day, but not right now. for now, you can just assume all the women use the pill and no one (in my stories) has any diseases

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Plenty of stories use condoms for conflict purposes.

 

[Lionheart72]

It's an interesting point. Of the few stories I've written so far, I only have two (still in draft form) which mention birth control. One in the post-coital context of "thank god I'm on the pill" and the other, as JAMESBJOHNSON says, as a conflict... in this case as a reason why the couple has to find an alternative to vaginal intercourse.

I think I'm going to take this a challenge and see if I can fit a mention of birth control (be it condoms or the pill) or it's lack into future stories.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I'm writing one as we speak.

Hubby goes off to jail for a violation of probation, momma and the kiddies are evicted from the rent-a-trailer, and momma signs up for welfare assistance. The social worker makes her a deal she cant refuse as daddy has a year and a day to serve.

 

[Vielle]

I appreciate reading everyone's replies. Since I'm still on my incest kick (I keep thinking I'll write it out of my system and then get interested in something else, but maybe I'll just forever love incest stories ), I always think about birth control when I'm writing, because, well, obviously, no one wants to have X-File babies, but then I never do because I don't think anyone wants to read about birth control anxiety in an erotic story.

But now, I think I'll try to make a point of working it in. . . or maybe the lack of birth control can be a source of conflict or stress. Yeah, I think I have an idea . . .

 

[Handley_Page]

Strangely enough two of my first (read) stories featured using a condom

 

[sadangel]

I've seen a few stories that mention condoms. It doesn't turn me off at all. If it's written well. It can be.

 

[Carnevil9]

The stork brings babies. But the "swallow" never does.......Carney

 

[Darkniciad]

A lot of mine as Les tend to bring it up, since those are set in the real world for the most part. Usually limited to a quick mention that she's on the pill and straight into the action. There are a couple of condoms here and there, as well.

Never comes up in my fantasy world stories. There's magic to prevent unwanted pregnancy and clerics to cure whatever you pick up at the local bawdy house.

 

[SimonBrooke]

I think, for many, the use of a condom in an erotic story is a turn off.

I think there are redundant words in that sentence. Condoms are always a turn-off. Sex in a condom is a bit like sunbathing in a space suit.

There are two separate issues here: one is pregnancy, and the other is infection.

As to pregnancy, condoms are not only not necessary, they aren't even particularly effective. And the alternative doesn't have to be 'the pill'. Coils (IUDs) are very effective and require no fuss at any time. The cap is a hassle and interrupts spontaneity even worse than condoms but at least it doesn't affect feel. Finally, of course, a surprisingly large number of people are just naturally sterile, and even if you're not sterile, vasectomies are common. So you don't need condoms in a story because of risk of pregnancy.

Risk of infection is a whole other issue. Obviously, the degree of risk varies with the promiscuity and sexual history of your characters, and with how much they know about each other. It is not necessarily very high. Crossing roads is risky, but we all do it every day.

Condoms are inherently unsexy. In all my stories I think I've mentioned them explicitly just once:

For the first time, they had lain together in a bed - in Mike's bed, in his flat. His flat had surprised her. Of course; everything about him still surprised her. She still knew so little of him. They'd lain together in his bed, sated and dreamy; she'd lifted sticky fingers to her lips and tasted his seed on them.

"We aren't taking precautions", she had said to him. "Are we safe?"

"From pregnancy?" he'd said. She'd nodded. "There are condoms in my pocket," he'd said. "You had only to ask."

"Why should it be me who should ask?" She'd been angry.

"It's your body," he'd said. "It's your risk."

She'd been furious. She'd fought with him. The fight had turned to sex. Of course it had. And she'd known he was challenging her, challenging her to say 'stop, put a condom on'. And she hadn't. She
was stubborn too. She'd felt his seed pump into her again, and been glad.

It had come to her, in the post orgasmic quiet, that this couldn't last. That a man with such understanding of women, such obvious experience of women, would not settle with one. Should not, when there were so many other women who needed this shock of joy. To quicken with his child would be to have something of him with her always.

 

[wife2hotblk]

For me...I have a pregnancy fetish anyway. I actually began writing erotica at another site specifically dedicated to the subject. So in most cases, it is heading that way anyway. Besides most of my stories have a decidely romantic/committed bent to them anyway. If I didn't have such a dirty mind, I should give this up and write romances and make some money from it. LOL.

I did use the issue in a couple of my stories as a point of conflict within the storyline. In my novel, New Beginnings, she specifically makes him for a time. When they re-unite he specifically makes it a point that he will not go back to using them, because he is pushing her away from using him as nothing more than a casual boy toy.

You made the point about the difference between real life and our writing, my story Down and Dirty in a Garage is semi-autobiographical. Everything was real until the moment he took that condom off. In real life, no way in hades; not with a player like him. But it was fun to switch it around a bit in the fantasy.

If I mention it, it is always to do with moving the characters from casual to commitment, which is actually very reflective of my real life. Whether or not I was on the pill, I did not go bare with anyone without commitment.

 

[Verdad]

I don't see why condoms shouldn't be used in stories. They don't have to be, it's not like fiction is a safe sex manual, but they can be, for various story purposes. Including or omitting them is like including or omitting any other element and depends on the effect you want to achieve.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I don't see why condoms shouldn't be used in stories. They don't have to be, it's not like fiction is a safe sex manual, but they can be, for various story purposes. Including or omitting them is like including or omitting any other element and depends on the effect you want to achieve.

I agree. If the writer wants a preachy tone that annoys readers, add a sermonette about rubbers or bicycle helmets or steel-toed safety shoes.

I'm reading a book set in the 1940s, and the word 'nigger' and 'colored' and 'Nig-ro' are used frequently. But the writer is so uptight about it he adds stupid disclaimers about how uncouth and ignorant 40s people were compared to himself. We get it! Its okay to think nigger but not okay to say it. Its okay to think 'cunt' but not okay to say it.

 

[The_Darkness]

Personally, I got myself fixed so it's not an issue with the pregnancy thing with my wife and I, and I gotta say, the sex has been phenominal since I've been tested twice for shooting blanks...no one has to worry about her getting pregnant and her hormones have almost balanced back out to normal.

All in all, I'd say no birth control = better sex, and that is also a pattern I'd note with my former romantic encounters as well.

In my stories, I never mention it, but then again my smut leads people to believe that there's no chance of pregnancy (or that there is, in an unwritten observation on part of the reader) and it's a "magical" world where STDs don't exist.

As an aside, Math Girl used to have stories that were intentionally poorly written. So bad they were comedic, fall out of your chair, stupidly funny. Unless you didn't get the joke or are immune to sarcasm. Maybe that's something we can explore with this...

"Well honey, I guess you're preggo..."

"Well, dumb fuck, I guess you've got HIV. Thanks for the child-support you stupid horny fuck."

 

[Verdad]

I agree. If the writer wants a preachy tone that annoys readers, add a sermonette about rubbers or bicycle helmets or steel-toed safety shoes.

Agreed. Heavy-handedness is off-putting.



As for condoms, once again, it depends on the scene. Porn is so formulaic partly because people want to reach a consensus as to what's hottest and write everything that way.

While I still scribbled, I worked on a story (waving to my coauthor if he's reading!) where the scene absolutely dictated the guy wear a condom. The setting was clinical and antiseptic, the sex was half-hateful, the emotion was of a thwarted attempt to connect. Condom fitted it like, well, like a condom! And it was still a hot scene, and it worked to that end.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I dunno.

The first time I had sex I literally destroyed two condoms then went bare-back. It was funny. But I'm not convinced rubbers are relevant in a story inless they add something to the plot.

 

[Verdad]

But, I was being all symbolist and stuff!

 

[Recidiva]

I don't make mention of it.

I'm building a fantasy here so I don't include trips to the bathroom either. Birth control is a mood killer for me anyway and I don't feel the need to go much further into the issue. Stuff that doesn't interest me doesn't really get written about.

I consider it one of those everyday things that is well enough comprehended that I don't need to care particularly.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Hahahaha

I forgot who it was here. I let them read one of my stories but made it clear I wasnt interested in any feedback. So the person gave me feedback anyway. The story was about snakes. So this AH reader gives me his/her take on the symbolism of snakes AND WHAT I INTENDED with the symbolism. I then said ITS A STORY ABOUT SNAKES, THATS ALL IT IS. JUST SNAKES.