FurryFury
Addict of Sensation
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2005
- Posts
- 29,460
Dear X and a host of X'es,
You took my girl (mostly) away from me for three weeks.
I gave her an inch and she took a mile. Then again sometimes she ran back to my sheltering arms and I worried for her ability to be independent.
I watched you fire her passion, feed her muse, be her inspiration and it made me smile.
I heard her say she didn't want me to see the results, that it was private, why couldn't she have anything private, but she shared it with you. That hurt. I'm a mom you see.
She wasn't available to me as she usually is. Instead she was busy working on what you would have her do and what she would eagerly chose to do. When her mind was wrung out she was off walking her energy away, alone. Alone by choice not wanting me there.
I felt selfishly needy but I smiled because I knew that she was happy and yes, even healthier than usual, both physically and mentally.
Meanwhile I've been having a very rough four weeks. Without my girl I was feeling down. Without my husband even more so. With (mostly) my boy verbally sparing, well, it sucked.
My health hasn't good. Every Monday morning I've used the neti pot. Each day I've taken my drugs and hoped to make it through the busy season without having to work a doctor's visit into the schedule and / or losing my voice.
Each person in the family has been sick, fighting sickness and/or injured at some point during all this. That's always depressing.
My carefully constructed and twisted rubics cube of a schedule got totally messed up by a change in work schedule, team schedule, my work and my girl's schedule. It was really frustrating.
So I was down, way down. While I was down some folks took a few kicks. How did they know? The bastards.
I remember thinking to myself. My girl may be gone in a year, I expected that and here is a preview or perhaps she is already gone from me? Maybe she will return after this and maybe she won't but in any case she'll be gone soon.
Silently, I worked to readjust to this possibility. Sadly I tried to find the good in it. Yes, there is good in it.
Then today, near the end of this long exhausting haul, I walked into your (suddenly scheduled thirty minutes earlier than one would expect,) reception.
When you saw me, you lit up and I knew she'd always be my girl no matter how distant and independent she becomes. In her heart she'll always feel that way about me in her heart. It made me feel honored, petty, humbled and at peace.
Then I heard from all of you how talented and extraordinary she is. Of course that I knew already but still to hear it from people who'd been complete strangers up until three weeks ago was quite wonderful.
So thank you for filling her up, fanning the flames of her passion and recognizing what a wonderful girl she is. I may have been selfish and fearful but I was also hopeful and excited. I'm glad you all enjoyed one another and I think the overall benefits will be great for you, my girl and me.
You took my girl (mostly) away from me for three weeks.
I gave her an inch and she took a mile. Then again sometimes she ran back to my sheltering arms and I worried for her ability to be independent.
I watched you fire her passion, feed her muse, be her inspiration and it made me smile.
I heard her say she didn't want me to see the results, that it was private, why couldn't she have anything private, but she shared it with you. That hurt. I'm a mom you see.
She wasn't available to me as she usually is. Instead she was busy working on what you would have her do and what she would eagerly chose to do. When her mind was wrung out she was off walking her energy away, alone. Alone by choice not wanting me there.
I felt selfishly needy but I smiled because I knew that she was happy and yes, even healthier than usual, both physically and mentally.
Meanwhile I've been having a very rough four weeks. Without my girl I was feeling down. Without my husband even more so. With (mostly) my boy verbally sparing, well, it sucked.
My health hasn't good. Every Monday morning I've used the neti pot. Each day I've taken my drugs and hoped to make it through the busy season without having to work a doctor's visit into the schedule and / or losing my voice.
Each person in the family has been sick, fighting sickness and/or injured at some point during all this. That's always depressing.
My carefully constructed and twisted rubics cube of a schedule got totally messed up by a change in work schedule, team schedule, my work and my girl's schedule. It was really frustrating.
So I was down, way down. While I was down some folks took a few kicks. How did they know? The bastards.
I remember thinking to myself. My girl may be gone in a year, I expected that and here is a preview or perhaps she is already gone from me? Maybe she will return after this and maybe she won't but in any case she'll be gone soon.
Silently, I worked to readjust to this possibility. Sadly I tried to find the good in it. Yes, there is good in it.
Then today, near the end of this long exhausting haul, I walked into your (suddenly scheduled thirty minutes earlier than one would expect,) reception.
When you saw me, you lit up and I knew she'd always be my girl no matter how distant and independent she becomes. In her heart she'll always feel that way about me in her heart. It made me feel honored, petty, humbled and at peace.
Then I heard from all of you how talented and extraordinary she is. Of course that I knew already but still to hear it from people who'd been complete strangers up until three weeks ago was quite wonderful.
So thank you for filling her up, fanning the flames of her passion and recognizing what a wonderful girl she is. I may have been selfish and fearful but I was also hopeful and excited. I'm glad you all enjoyed one another and I think the overall benefits will be great for you, my girl and me.
