Older Male Seeking Female Friends Who Can Tolerate "Dad Jokes"

[Shygentleman2]

When life gives you melons

You might be dyslexic

 

[Merryegoround]

What did the elephant say to the naked man?

How do you breathe through that little thing?

 

[Shygentleman2]

Just saw this thread now….I’ll have to tell my Dad.

My kids just groan! Although I text my youngest one every day. He says his friends love them!

 

[hugh_jarce69]

I saw an advert in a shop window yesterday.
"Second-hand television for sale. £10. Volume stuck on high"

I thought, I can't turn that down

 

[hugh_jarce69]

When life gives you melons

You might be dyslexic

did you hear about the dyslexic who walked into a bra?

 

[Lichen2CU]

This thread has made me laugh way too much!

You're welcome! Is too much laughing "a thing"????

 

[LittleMissSunshine12]

You're welcome! Is too much laughing "a thing"????

Guilty pleasure mixed with should be working - so yes

 

[EasyBrad59]

Time for a real groaner:

What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?

Beef stroking off!

 

[Shygentleman2]

Guilty pleasure mixed with should be working - so yes

That whole pesky "real life" thing!

 

[Shygentleman2]

We heard that a man aged 104yrs won a marathon race. Then I asked my dad , "what is your excuse"

And he said ,"That man had more time to train"

 

[NCneedslove_18]

I just built an ATM that only gives out coins. I don’t know why no one’s thought of it before, it just makes cents!

 

[NCneedslove_18]

Where do rainbows go when they've been bad?

To prism, so they have time to reflect on what they've done.

 

[Lichen2CU]

Where do rainbows go when they've been bad?

To prism, so they have time to reflect on what they've done.

Wow...

 

[Lichen2CU]

Great to see you again NC...

 

[TheWorldBuilder]

The hale 93 year old married a blonde 70 years his junior. They settled down to a life of bliss, but six months later the girl turned up at the vicarage in tears asking the clergyman to arrange a funeral.

"I thought your husband was as fit as a fiddle."

"Oh he was, vicar, he was. Life was idyllic and every Sunday morning we'd make slow, passionate love to the sound of your church bells. If only that bloody fire engine hadn't come past last weekend."

 

[Shygentleman2]

A joke for the older kids:

What has two butts and kills people?

An assassin

 

[Merryegoround]

Old men are like concrete.

After getting laid, they take a long time to get hard.