Anyone from the UK?

OK, that scared the shite out of me. I knew it was coming but forgot all about it.
Swiped open and the alert text disappeared. Tried to find it in notifications, but nothing.

So - could have been tsunami, terrorist attack, WW3, or risk of sun burn
 
Swiped open and the alert text disappeared. Tried to find it in notifications, but nothing.

So - could have been tsunami, terrorist attack, WW3, or risk of sun burn
Mine stayed there, for longer than my ears were happy with.
 
Swiped open and the alert text disappeared. Tried to find it in notifications, but nothing.

So - could have been tsunami, terrorist attack, WW3, or risk of sun burn
Woke me from my nap, bloody govt, can't even let us nap in peace 😀
 
That moment when you're dreaming up a new story involving food sex. Then your missus calls you to the kitchen to help stir her bread pudding mixture 😩
 
Tell her 'only if she licks the stirrer'
That reminds me of that Peter Kay joke.

Bloke owns a butchers. One day he says to Peter, "I had to sack one of our butchers"
"Oh, why?" says Peter.
"Kept putting his dick in the bacon slicer"
"Oh my god! That's terrible. What happened to the bacon slicer?"
"Sacked her an all"
 
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