Cock Talk

[SalaciousMonkey22]

Is it wrong to say I'm a little disappointed to find this quote isn't an original Monkeyism?

I suppose I’m honored for it to have been a consideration

 

[EvaLane]

POP QUIZ:

Answering the last set of questions didn’t go over well for me, but… well, who knows. Maybe if I repeat my behaviour, the outcome will be different

Are we sure Circle Jerks are even a real thing?
Has anyone ever attended one?

They must be real. They must be. If I close my eyes really tight and cross my fingers and toes, I can almost wish it into existence.

Are they planned, or does everyone just start whipping them out?

I imagine it’s much more casual than most would assume… it could just be very late, some sleazy film on in the background, maybe she’s already slept with a few of the guys in the past things happen.

Not with me, of course, things never happen with me

Is the first guy out shamed in any way?
Is the last guy the winner?

First guy out should be last one in, that feels fair. Equal rights, equal rotation, blah blah

Does everyone remain in a circle until the last guy finishes?

“Male loneliness epidemic” y’all won’t even cheer each other on. Absurd.

Do you put down a tarp or something?
What does Emily Post say about proper Circle Jerk etiquette?

I did suggest a parka once They make cute clear ones now, for visibility and such.

But if it’s unplanned (which I’m assuming it is), etiquette kind of disintegrates. Chaos is part of the draw for me.

Not much room for boundaries when you’re surrounded by cock.

So I hear.

 

[hotwords229_A]

There is soggy biscuit https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soggy_biscuit so I can quite believe in Circle jerks

This is what I was thinking in terms of the first guy finishing and the last guy finishing.
It seems eating the biscuit is the punishment, but, in that case, it seems the first to blow his wad would lose as he seems the most excited. The rules of this game are very dubious.

I imagine I would argue the rules so much as to ruin the spontaneity of the event.

I was always under the impression that a circle jerk was a just a bunch of dudes sitting in a circle jerking the dude off to each others right

Now see, I always thought everyone was jerking themselves off, just in a circle. Jerking each other off kind of makes more sense.

So if there’s a biscuit in the middle, it’s a game.
If you jerk yourself off, or the guy next to you, it’s a circle jerk.
If you blow the guy next to you, it becomes a daisy chain.
If there is a girl in the middle, it’s bukake.
If all the guys are clothed and staring at the ground in a circle, it’s a construction crew.

Weird!

 

[peekingone]

There is soggy biscuit https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soggy_biscuit so I can quite believe in Circle jerks

Also known as the gooky cookie

 

[Love_Is_Blonde]

So if there’s a biscuit in the middle, it’s a game.
If you jerk yourself off, or the guy next to you, it’s a circle jerk.
If you blow the guy next to you, it becomes a daisy chain.
If there is a girl in the middle, it’s bukake.
If all the guys are clothed and staring at the ground in a circle, it’s a construction crew.

Weird!

So when does the Hokey-Pokey come into play? You put your right foot in.. You put your right foot out …

 

[Taegul]

So when does the Hokey-Pokey come into play? You put your right foot in.. You put your right foot out …

Forget the Hokey, I just want the Pokey.

 

[deft]

TIL that Americans don’t call it the Hokey-Cokey

 

[hotwords229_A]

Circle jerks, daisy chains, soggy biscuits, bukake . . .


We aren’t even hearing stories about a friend’s neighbor’s cousin.

My conclusion: these things exist in porn only and maybe some people have tried them post internet porn, but they don’t really exist in every day life.

This makes things dull.

I prefer to live in a world where Bigfoot, Nessie and the Jersey Devil are circle jerking on a UFO with the aliens and bukake(ing) the Lady in White (ghost) while she eats biscuits.

It just makes life more fun.

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

Circle jerks, daisy chains, soggy biscuits, bukake . . .


We aren’t even hearing stories about a friend’s neighbor’s cousin.

My conclusion: these things exist in porn only and maybe some people have tried them post internet porn, but they don’t really exist in every day life.

This makes things dull.

I prefer to live in a world where Bigfoot, Nessie and the Jersey Devil are circle jerking on a UFO with the aliens and bukake(ing) the Lady in White (ghost) while she eats biscuits.

It just makes life more fun.

I honestly believe that these things (and the elephant walk, and dirty pig fucking) existed pre Internet porn but only so rich fucks in their secret society’s and fraternities could form bonds of mututal blackmail amongst themselves. No one did them for fun.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I honestly believe that these things (and the elephant walk, and dirty pig fucking) existed pre Internet porn but only so rich fucks in their secret society’s and fraternities could form bonds of mututal blackmail amongst themselves. No one did them for fun.

I’m hesitant to look up “the elephant walk”.

 

[deft]

I’m hesitant to look up “the elephant walk”.

C'mon, the ladies'll love the Lit Lads to elephant walk for them!

 

[MindYaBitness]

I’m hesitant to look up “the elephant walk”.

I believe this is @Wriggle 's specialty

 

[Taegul]

I prefer to live in a world where Bigfoot, Nessie and the Jersey Devil are circle jerking on a UFO with the aliens and bukake(ing) the Lady in White (ghost) while she eats biscuits.

I'm pretty sure that's the episode of X-Files that got the show canceled.

Scully needed years of therapy and never fully recovered.

 

[ScarletDaisy]

I honestly believe that these things (and the elephant walk, and dirty pig fucking) existed pre Internet porn but only so rich fucks in their secret society’s and fraternities could form bonds of mututal blackmail amongst themselves. No one did them for fun.

What about a squat cobbler?

 

[EvaLane]

I mean, if I were to do it, I don’t think I’d necessarily advertise my services.

It would have to be private, like everything else I do. Discretion, trust, consent - if it doesn’t feel right, it’s not going to go right.

That’s the thing, feeling that with so many people at once… it starts to lose its appeal. I can’t possibly connect to eight people at the same time, even if all I care about is how badly they want to get off. Without that spark, it would feel grody, I think.

But if it was unplanned, like I said, well, there would be different sort of sparks and motivations to maybe… preform.

Maybe I should ask some of my friends of friends.

 

[Artfan2]

C'mon, the ladies'll love the Lit Lads to elephant walk for them!

Elephants do have a certain rhythm when they walk.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I mean, if I were to do it, I don’t think I’d necessarily advertise my services.

It would have to be private, like everything else I do. Discretion, trust, consent - if it doesn’t feel right, it’s not going to go right.

That’s the thing, feeling that with so many people at once… it starts to lose its appeal. I can’t possibly connect to eight people at the same time, even if all I care about is how badly they want to get off. Without that spark, it would feel grody, I think.

But if it was unplanned, like I said, well, there would be different sort of sparks and motivations to maybe… preform.

Maybe I should ask some of my friends of friends.

I was hoping that grody link was a hot bukake pic.

 

[Taegul]

I was hoping that grody link was a hot bukake pic.

Yeah, I miss Little_Sister too. IYKYK

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

I mean, if I were to do it, I don’t think I’d necessarily advertise my services.

It would have to be private, like everything else I do. Discretion, trust, consent - if it doesn’t feel right, it’s not going to go right.

That’s the thing, feeling that with so many people at once… it starts to lose its appeal. I can’t possibly connect to eight people at the same time, even if all I care about is how badly they want to get off. Without that spark, it would feel grody, I think.

But if it was unplanned, like I said, well, there would be different sort of sparks and motivations to maybe… preform.

Maybe I should ask some of my friends of friends.

Look, you can stop being coy. This is a judgment free (mostly, looks around suspiciously) space.

 

[hotwords229_A]

Okay, I looked up the “elephant walk”. At first, it just gave me examples of elephants walking, so I changed the search to “elephant walk penis”. That was a huge mistake.

Finally, “elephant walk euphemism” and learned what it meant. Not as bad as I had imagined.
But it would have been better if one of you could have just told me what it was!

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

I believe this is @Wriggle 's specialty

His is far more entertaining

 

[jason28053]

Okay, I looked up the “elephant walk”. At first, it just gave me examples of elephants walking, so I changed the search to “elephant walk penis”. That was a huge mistake.

Finally, “elephant walk euphemism” and learned what it meant. Not as bad as I had imagined.
But it would have been better if one of you could have just told me what it was!

It’s a song written by Henry Mancini lol

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

Okay, I looked up the elephant walk. At first, it just gave me examples of elephants walking, so I changed the search to “elephant walk penis”. That was a huge mistake.

Finally, “elephant walk euphemism” and learned what it meant. Not as bad as I had imagined.
But it would have been better if one of you could have just told me what it was!

I was gonna! I learned about it from a college friend who went to a prep school and transferred to Duke after freshman year. Probably because we refused to participate. Rich people are fucking weirdos.

 

[jason28053]

I was gonna! I learned about it from a college friend who went to a prep school and transferred to Duke after freshman year. Probably because we refused to participate. Rich people are fucking weirdos.

You spelled Dook wrong

 

[ScarletDaisy]

Finally, “elephant walk euphemism” and learned what it meant. Not as bad as I had imagined.
But it would have been better if one of you could have just told me what it was!

I was afraid to hit enter, but I couldn't stop myself.