Anyone know any good jokes?

[Big_Mikes_Balls]

Here is a good one.

I was at liberal bookstore yesterday.
I asked if they had Trump's new book on how to deport illegal aliens.....
The clerk said:
Get the ____ out of here and don't come back.....
My reply:
Yes thats the one,,,do you have it in paperback...."

 

[RoryN]

See: Challenge to Lit Deplorables: try to be funny!

https://forum.literotica.com/threads/challenge-to-lit-deplorables-try-to-be-funny.1591706/

(Hardly any decent humor, but interesting all the same.)

 

[Bn2f]

Here is a good one.

I was at liberal bookstore yesterday.
I asked if they had Trump's new book on how to deport illegal aliens.....
The clerk said:
Get the ____ out of here and don't come back.....
My reply:
Yes thats the one,,,do you have it in paperback...."

What’s a liberal bookstore???
I’ll give you credit for saying that you’re a trumper who can read but will take points away because trump only understands illustrated pop-ups colored with bright markers - and I wish, to dear lord, I was telling this as a joke but I’m not.

 

[Politruk]

I have limericks.

A Republican man about town
Could make a smile vertical frown
For, at finish, the heel
Always made the girl kneel
And let all the wealth trickle down!

A Democrat is well suited to diddle
In the sense that he's straight-up-the-middle
But, 'tween left and right hand
He can ne'er . . . raise a stand --
At the end, can just sit there and twiddle!

The proud stalwarts of the Tea Party
Have lusts that are hearty but naughty
Such as offering their sacks
As mid-morning snacks
To all and to sundry! How haughty!

All the White Working Class are for Trump
He is too great a winner to dump!
All his crimes, lies and graft
Are just good for a laugh --
They will take it all straight up the rump!

Socialists like to share their virility
But it brings social costs in fertility
For, "To each by her need!"
Is their true, solemn creed,
But the sharing wears out the ability!

When Communists' love interest sparks
They fulfill dialectic of Marx
From raging class struggle
To lazy ass-snuggle
In beds, kitchens, cars, shops and parks!

A Minuteman was a staunch fearless warder
'Gainst the Brown Peril south of the border
'Til a boom-chicka chica
From south Costa Rica
Sucked him into a whole New World Order!

An Objectivist Atlas will shrug
When the ladies won't go past a hug --
Self-reliant as Rand
Is his own nimble hand
On his Fountainhead ready to tug!

A Theocon's holy and pious
But it seems that his judgment is biased
By his mind filled with floods
Of the cries of hung studs:
"Come into the closet and try us!"

A lascivious thing is a Green
Every tree, every shrub, every bean
Every beast classed "Endangered"
And life-forms far stranger
Must endure his attentions obscene!

The bold ladies who camp with the OWSers
Are no puritanical wowsers
One can't walk up Wall Street
Without hearing them tweet,
"Why, what's that occupying your trousers?!"

Libertarians swing and they play
You can use them most any which way
Straight, gay, trans, or bi
Or whatever you'll try!
All while shouting, "For freedom! Hooray!"

 

[Big_Mikes_Balls]

See: Challenge to Lit Deplorables: try to be funny!

https://forum.literotica.com/threads/challenge-to-lit-deplorables-try-to-be-funny.1591706/

(Hardly any decent humor, but interesting all the same.)

Thanks for the link. I’ll will check it out

 

[Big_Mikes_Balls]

What’s a liberal bookstore???

Not sure. I didn’t write the joke. I would have to speculate.

 

[Big_Mikes_Balls]

I have limericks.

A Republican man about town
Could make a smile vertical frown
For, at finish, the heel
Always made the girl kneel
And let all the wealth trickle down!

A Democrat is well suited to diddle
In the sense that he's straight-up-the-middle
But, 'tween left and right hand
He can ne'er . . . raise a stand --
At the end, can just sit there and twiddle!

The proud stalwarts of the Tea Party
Have lusts that are hearty but naughty
Such as offering their sacks
As mid-morning snacks
To all and to sundry! How haughty!

All the White Working Class are for Trump
He is too great a winner to dump!
All his crimes, lies and graft
Are just good for a laugh --
They will take it all straight up the rump!

Socialists like to share their virility
But it brings social costs in fertility
For, "To each by her need!"
Is their true, solemn creed,
But the sharing wears out the ability!

When Communists' love interest sparks
They fulfill dialectic of Marx
From raging class struggle
To lazy ass-snuggle
In beds, kitchens, cars, shops and parks!

A Minuteman was a staunch fearless warder
'Gainst the Brown Peril south of the border
'Til a boom-chicka chica
From south Costa Rica
Sucked him into a whole New World Order!

An Objectivist Atlas will shrug
When the ladies won't go past a hug --
Self-reliant as Rand
Is his own nimble hand
On his Fountainhead ready to tug!

A Theocon's holy and pious
But it seems that his judgment is biased
By his mind filled with floods
Of the cries of hung studs:
"Come into the closet and try us!"

A lascivious thing is a Green
Every tree, every shrub, every bean
Every beast classed "Endangered"
And life-forms far stranger
Must endure his attentions obscene!

The bold ladies who camp with the OWSers
Are no puritanical wowsers
One can't walk up Wall Street
Without hearing them tweet,
"Why, what's that occupying your trousers?!"

Libertarians swing and they play
You can use them most any which way
Straight, gay, trans, or bi
Or whatever you'll try!
All while shouting, "For freedom! Hooray!"

Nice! You have a natural talent for writing.

 

[Philthy_Phil]

Here is a good one.

I was at liberal bookstore yesterday.
I asked if they had Trump's new book on how to deport illegal aliens.....
The clerk said:
Get the ____ out of here and don't come back.....
My reply:
Yes thats the one,,,do you have it in paperback...."

Not bad.