Sex & Shenanigans

[crazychemgirl]

Or this one?

NYT: Older women are the new hotness in porn

 

[Mrtenant]

This one made me do a double take:

NLM: Penile Duplication and Two Anal Openings; Report of a Very Rare Case

My uncle is like that. Uncle Gary. Or as he is known around town, Scary Gary. He used to work at the circus as a contortionist. That's what he said anyway.

 

[Mrtenant]

Is this more your speed then?

Metro: Britons watch more ‘granny porn’ than anyone – and Matron may be to blame

You are soooo accommodating. The lube must be working.

 

[Mrtenant]

I don't know, the personal ads can be pretty interesting too

Single guy from Tennessee, lookin for the hawt ladies. Bring your own maga hat for extra points?

 

[MindYaBitness]

Single guy from Tennessee, lookin for the hawt ladies. Bring your own maga hat for extra points?

the first one I'd ever read was a guy looking for a pretty grotesque woman with a "gaping vagina". To this day I can't decide if it's a troll or if he's serious!

 

[MrMakersMark]

the first one I'd ever read was a guy looking for a pretty grotesque woman with a "gaping vagina". To this day I can't decide if it's a troll or if he's serious!

I could come up with some wild shit to throw on a mock personal ad.

But in my wisdom I've learned restraint.

 

[crazychemgirl]

I could come up with some wild shit to throw on a mock personal ad.

But in my wisdom I've learned restraint.

You have restraint?


Since when?

 

[Mrtenant]

the first one I'd ever read was a guy looking for a pretty grotesque woman with a "gaping vagina". To this day I can't decide if it's a troll or if he's serious!

Ohhh, he's looking for my Aunt Barbie! Her real name's Barbara, but we all call her Barbie for short. There's always an echo around her. But, she makes the best coconut cream pies. No idea what she puts in it. But they are great!

 

[crazychemgirl]

the first one I'd ever read was a guy looking for a pretty grotesque woman with a "gaping vagina". To this day I can't decide if it's a troll or if he's serious!

Gives new meaning to cavernous cunt.

 

[crazychemgirl]

You are soooo accommodating. The lube must be working.

It’s strawberry flavoured.

 

[crazychemgirl]

I think you are all gorgeous, fucked up weirdos ….

This is why we all get along so well.

 

[Mrtenant]

It’s strawberry flavoured.

Chocolate covered strawberry?

I know I know, I went there

 

[crazychemgirl]

Chocolate covered strawberry?

I know I know, I went there

Omg hubby bought some chocolate covered strawberry coffee creamer … it was totally decadent.

 

[crazychemgirl]

In my early days on Lit… I did post some personal ads… I got zero response.

 

[MrMakersMark]

You have restraint?


Since when?

Wha??
Ccg firing shots o'er the bow and stuff.
I feel set upon by thine implication.

 

[Mrtenant]

Gotta roll. Catch you freaks later.

 

[crazychemgirl]

Gotta roll. Catch you freaks later.

Have fun fucker.

 

[MrMakersMark]

Chocolate covered strawberry?

I know I know, I went there

 

[MrMakersMark]

Omg hubby bought some chocolate covered strawberry coffee creamer … it was totally decadent.

Ohhh....
That pivot was so spot on.

 

[crazychemgirl]

Now … should I … or shouldn’t I … do a 7000 page S&S awards?

 

[MindYaBitness]

I could come up with some wild shit to throw on a mock personal ad.

But in my wisdom I've learned restraint.

I've definitely thought of writing a toungue in cheek personal ad, based on the best of the worst messages I've gotten. However, I thought better of it, because I've noticed a lot of guys here are tone deaf and I don't actually want an inbox full of dicks and awkward messages

 

[MrMakersMark]

I've definitely thought of writing a toungue in cheek personal ad, based on the best of the worst messages I've gotten. However, I thought better of it, because I've noticed a lot of guys here are tone deaf and I don't actually want an inbox full of dicks and awkward messages

I'd laugh. Bank on that.

In my case? I don't get messages so my own verbal illustrations would be delightfully untethered from culture, social morays and common sense.

Right into the idiot-ditch I would fecklessly drag you all.

 

[FormerAllStar2]

I've definitely thought of writing a toungue in cheek personal ad, based on the best of the worst messages I've gotten. However, I thought better of it, because I've noticed a lot of guys here are tone deaf and I don't actually want an inbox full of dicks and awkward messages

https://gifdb.com/images/high/my-bad-chris-pratt-eoimen35gcmf67ke.gif

 

[dawn_of_night]

Except that… I don’t think of y’all as strangers… and I don’t even try to pretend to have my shit together

View attachment 2485082

Missin' you in my bed right now.......
You beautiful shit for strangers on the Internet day.....



I Mean, hi, babygirl

 

[dawn_of_night]

I just don’t play, im a terrible liar so I have a terrible face

Your face is beautiful whenever, you want to play it....