Sex & Shenanigans

[Bry1313]

I see your hummus … and raise you everything bagel hummus

Hummus…….amazing
Everything bagels……top 3 bagel

As a MOT, don’t mix them.


https://media1.tenor.com/m/eQZOgM8vzYAAAAAC/nancy-kerrigan-why.gif

 

[Bry1313]

Only because you won't respect my authority

Have better ideas

 

[crazychemgirl]

Hummus…….amazing
Everything bagels……top 3 bagel

As a MOT, don’t mix them.


https://media1.tenor.com/m/eQZOgM8vzYAAAAAC/nancy-kerrigan-why.gif

See @UnquietDreams …. Rigid wank.

 

[crazychemgirl]

Do you know how long it took for me to learn this? So many ruined household items

I thought it was your sense of humor? And/or perfectly sized, shaped, and angled dong?

Angled?

29°
78°


What is the perfect angle for a dong????

 

[UnquietDreams]

Not everything is a sexual aid.

My friend who works as an ER doc would argue that.

Anything is a sexual aid if you are either 1)horny enough, or --more often-- 2) drunk enough.

 

[MindYaBitness]

Ok but hear me out …. Fruit by the foot as suspenders covering your nipples…


Someone needs to try this.

I don't know if these are wide enough, but if I'm willing to try squeeze cheese, you know I'm gonna give this one a whirl!

 

[crazychemgirl]

My friend who works as an ER doc would argue that.

Anything is a sexual aid if you are either 1)horny enough, or --more often-- 2) drunk enough.

Since when did hands / fingers become so passé???

 

[deefalttwunnyfor]

They are the cutest, aren’t they

It fills me with so many emotions. Joy, laughter, 'awwwwww', jealousy, a tinge of sadness but no so much that it's actually acknowlegeable over the other ones, horniness, yes that's a word; fuck you red squiggly line things

 

[UnquietDreams]

Angled?

29°
78°


What is the perfect angle for a dong????

 

[aussiegeekygal]

My friend who works as an ER doc would argue that.

Anything is a sexual aid if you are either 1)horny enough, or --more often-- 2) drunk enough.

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

Have better ideas

 

[UnquietDreams]

Since when did hands / fingers become so passé???

The first time someone looked at a cactus and thought, "Hey, I have an idea!"

 

[crazychemgirl]

What angle is that?

 

[Bry1313]

This is why it pays more to be a rigid wank like @Bry1313

Like that’s why I’m not invited

 

[crazychemgirl]

The first time someone looked at a cactus and thought, "Hey, I have an idea!"

Was cactus really the FIRST thing????

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

The length really helps act as a handle.
Or I've been told. What's the equivalent of AFAF here?

 

[deefalttwunnyfor]

Angled?

29°
78°


What is the perfect angle for a dong????

I've read that if it is somewhat angled upwards that during doggystyle it hits a g spot perfectly. I don't know, I've never found it. Mine's all off to the left. Stupid left-handedness and teenage years. And 20s. And 30s. Goddamn it I love margaritas

 

[UnquietDreams]

Now add tequila.

And the stories that come out of the ER...

 

[MindYaBitness]

This made my day … thank you.

I aim to please

 

[aussiegeekygal]

What angle is that?

At this point I don't think it really matters...

 

[deefalttwunnyfor]

View attachment 2443524

That looks like you need a friend to help conquer. Like a Lady and the Tramp kind of thing

 

[Bbl87]

Ok but hear me out …. Fruit by the foot as suspenders covering your nipples…


Someone needs to try this.

I mean, the edible pasties we bought the last time my wife and I went on a trip, that's basically what they were. Except not suspenders I guess.

 

[crazychemgirl]

Lmao @ lit changing my cut cucumber emoji to a full size cucumber

 

[aussiegeekygal]

That looks like you need a friend to help conquer. Like a Lady and the Tramp kind of thing

Where our lips gently touch?

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

My friend who works as an ER doc would argue that.

Anything is a sexual aid if you are either 1)horny enough, or --more often-- 2) drunk enough.

Sticking a feather up my ass doesn’t make me a chicken, or it a sex toy,