Sex & Shenanigans

[deefalttwunnyfor]

Not everything is a sexual aid.

Do you know how long it took for me to learn this? So many ruined household items

my single greatest strength in life is learning from other peoples mistakes.

I thought it was your sense of humor? And/or perfectly sized, shaped, and angled dong?

 

[Bry1313]

I see your hummus … and raise you everything bagel hummus

Hummus…….amazing
Everything bagels……top 3 bagel

As a MOT, don’t mix them.


https://media1.tenor.com/m/eQZOgM8vzYAAAAAC/nancy-kerrigan-why.gif

 

[Bry1313]

Only because you won't respect my authority

Have better ideas

 

[crazychemgirl]

Hummus…….amazing
Everything bagels……top 3 bagel

As a MOT, don’t mix them.


https://media1.tenor.com/m/eQZOgM8vzYAAAAAC/nancy-kerrigan-why.gif

See @UnquietDreams …. Rigid wank.

 

[crazychemgirl]

Do you know how long it took for me to learn this? So many ruined household items

I thought it was your sense of humor? And/or perfectly sized, shaped, and angled dong?

Angled?

29°
78°


What is the perfect angle for a dong????

 

[UnquietDreams]

Not everything is a sexual aid.

My friend who works as an ER doc would argue that.

Anything is a sexual aid if you are either 1)horny enough, or --more often-- 2) drunk enough.

 

[MindYaBitness]

Ok but hear me out …. Fruit by the foot as suspenders covering your nipples…


Someone needs to try this.

I don't know if these are wide enough, but if I'm willing to try squeeze cheese, you know I'm gonna give this one a whirl!

 

[crazychemgirl]

My friend who works as an ER doc would argue that.

Anything is a sexual aid if you are either 1)horny enough, or --more often-- 2) drunk enough.

Since when did hands / fingers become so passé???

 

[deefalttwunnyfor]

They are the cutest, aren’t they

It fills me with so many emotions. Joy, laughter, 'awwwwww', jealousy, a tinge of sadness but no so much that it's actually acknowlegeable over the other ones, horniness, yes that's a word; fuck you red squiggly line things

 

[UnquietDreams]

Angled?

29°
78°


What is the perfect angle for a dong????

 

[aussiegeekygal]

My friend who works as an ER doc would argue that.

Anything is a sexual aid if you are either 1)horny enough, or --more often-- 2) drunk enough.

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

Have better ideas

 

[UnquietDreams]

Since when did hands / fingers become so passé???

The first time someone looked at a cactus and thought, "Hey, I have an idea!"

 

[crazychemgirl]

What angle is that?

 

[Bry1313]

This is why it pays more to be a rigid wank like @Bry1313

Like that’s why I’m not invited

 

[crazychemgirl]

The first time someone looked at a cactus and thought, "Hey, I have an idea!"

Was cactus really the FIRST thing????

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

The length really helps act as a handle.
Or I've been told. What's the equivalent of AFAF here?

 

[deefalttwunnyfor]

Angled?

29°
78°


What is the perfect angle for a dong????

I've read that if it is somewhat angled upwards that during doggystyle it hits a g spot perfectly. I don't know, I've never found it. Mine's all off to the left. Stupid left-handedness and teenage years. And 20s. And 30s. Goddamn it I love margaritas

 

[UnquietDreams]

Now add tequila.

And the stories that come out of the ER...

 

[MindYaBitness]

This made my day … thank you.

I aim to please

 

[aussiegeekygal]

What angle is that?

At this point I don't think it really matters...

 

[deefalttwunnyfor]

View attachment 2443524

That looks like you need a friend to help conquer. Like a Lady and the Tramp kind of thing

 

[Bbl87]

Ok but hear me out …. Fruit by the foot as suspenders covering your nipples…


Someone needs to try this.

I mean, the edible pasties we bought the last time my wife and I went on a trip, that's basically what they were. Except not suspenders I guess.

 

[crazychemgirl]

Lmao @ lit changing my cut cucumber emoji to a full size cucumber

 

[aussiegeekygal]

That looks like you need a friend to help conquer. Like a Lady and the Tramp kind of thing

Where our lips gently touch?