What I Wrote And Why: 69 Minutes

EmilyMiller

Perv of the Impverse
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Introduction

69 Minutes is a 750 word story, the seventh of which I contributed to the event. It’s in the Lesbian category, one I frequently write for, and intended to be a celebration of mutual cunnilingus. Here, I’ll explain a bit about why and how I wrote it.

In the same way as with my WIWAW article about writing A Hard Day’s Night, I won’t totally follow @StillStunned’s more analytical template, but I hope that this is still in his intended spirit.

I was going to start by talking about 750 word stories in general.

750 Word Stories

So, I’ve not tried to do this before this year. I wrote one stand alone 750 worder, as an initial experiment, but the rest were all written specifically for the event, and compiled in recent weeks. But… especially when I was starting out, I did write a series of 1 - 2k super short stroke stories, so I’m not totally unfamiliar with the concept. However, my ambitions as a writer were much, much narrower back then.

There is going to be a theme of music in this WIWAW, something I probably know more about that writing, though sadly I never played an instrument, nor studied musical theory. I think my general view of the 750 word form is like short, ultra-technical pieces of music, designed to warm up, or to push to the limits of the instrumentalist’s ability. They are not symphonies, they are exercises. I guess another parallel is with a cadenza, in which a soloist showcases their technical ability, or emotional sensibility.

I worked out early on (not that this is a stunning revelation), that 750 word stories have to either tell a simple and pared-down story, or to evoke a feeling, or to document a short set of events. Anything more leaves you needing many more words.

So, I’ve treated the 750 word stories that I have written as experiments. Can I write in a category I don’t normally write in? Can I adopt a style, or tone, from my regular work to do something new? Can I amp up something that I normally do, in order to test the limits of the approach, or my ability to execute it?

This has led to a wide variety of ultra-short stories. I feel it’s been helpful to me. Not least, I tend to the prolix, and I have figured out that I can cut verbiage and increase impact. Again, not a startling revelation.

So, enough of the general, let’s get specific.

69 Minutes

So, for this story, the feeling I wanted to convey was the closeness, intensity and breathlessness shared between two women, each stimulating the other. Why? Well, I thought it something suitable for the format. And, more personally, I guess I miss such acts and their deep emotional connection (we always crave what we don’t have, right?).

I also wanted to make it something other than just a stroker. In particular, I challenged myself to avoid the normal words: things like pussy and clit. I wanted an impressionist painting of the act, not a hyperrealistic image.

To go back to music, there is a form called a tone poem (or symphonic poem), which can be described as follows:

[…] they are unlike traditional classical symphonic movements, in that their music is intended to inspire listeners to imagine or consider scenes, images, specific ideas or moods, and not (necessarily) to focus on following traditional patterns of musical form such as sonata form. This intention to inspire listeners was a direct consequence of Romanticism, which encouraged literary, pictorial and dramatic associations in music.

Wikipedia

I wanted to write the word equivalent of a tone poem (there is probably some term for this in literary theory, but this is not my area of expertise and I’m unaware of what it might be).

To capture the breathless aspect, frankly to make the reader’s heart beat faster, I adopted the short, staccato approach that I have used in other works to describe the feelings around sex. This is not to everyone’s taste of course.

I’d dabbled with this approach in From Me To You (focused on fellatio). With 69 Minutes, I dialed it up to eleven. The piece is intended to layer image upon image rapidly. To get the reader as caught up in the moment as I can recall being. You can argue whether or not I achieved this objective (I’m a novice writer and learning) but it was my intent.

I use alliteration extensively as it has the effect of driving the reader on, quickening the pulse.

I didn’t know the term at the time of writing, but I have since come across parataxis. And a lot of 69 Minutes employs this technique.

Parataxis can most simply be described as and compared to the way children speak. They speak their ideas as they come to them, one after the other, without logically connecting the ideas together. […] Works utilizing parataxis as a style may emit a staccato rhythm.

Wikipedia

My goal was maybe to connect with my own memories, to reach out to others for whom lesbian mutuality is their current experience, and to maybe give people who have never had a lesbian 69 (male and female) some idea what it is like. Again I don’t know that I was wholly successful. But it’s good to try stuff, that’s how we grow.

I hope this brief analysis is of some interest. I’d be happy to get any comments or different perspectives. Suggestions as to how the work could be improved are also welcome.

Emily
 
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...parataxis...

Uh huh. I recall commenting on your earliest stories, that they were maybe too clipped and abrupt. Continuing the music metaphor, they didn't flow, you were jarred from each staccato note to the next conveying no real melody. They were just notes. In 69 Minutes the staccato is in a form where the abbreviated note anticipates - even begs for - the following, and then the following, and the following, u.s.w., as the pace accelerates and the theme is formed. Think Bolero, it has that feeling in a surprisingly short span.

The coda is more of a rallentado than a ritardando, a gradual and deliberate slowing into a comforting, satisfying conclusion rather than a transition into a slower tempo. It works better than the Bolero example, which falls off the cliff the moment the lovers achieve their climax - there's no basking in the afterglow.

Like I said, good job!
 
Uh huh. I recall commenting on your earliest stories, that they were maybe too clipped and abrupt. Continuing the music metaphor, they didn't flow, you were jarred from each staccato note to the next conveying no real melody. They were just notes. In 69 Minutes the staccato is in a form where the abbreviated note anticipates - even begs for - the following, and then the following, and the following, u.s.w., as the pace accelerates and the theme is formed. Think Bolero, it has that feeling in a surprisingly short span.

The coda is more of a rallentado than a ritardando, a gradual and deliberate slowing into a comforting, satisfying conclusion rather than a transition into a slower tempo. It works better than the Bolero example, which falls off the cliff the moment the lovers achieve their climax - there's no basking in the afterglow.

Like I said, good job!
Thank you and I appreciate the musical perspective enormously 😍

Emily
 
I worked out early on (not that this is a stunning revelation), that 750 word stories have to either tell a simple and pared-down story, or to evoke a feeling, or to document a short set of events. Anything more leaves you needing many more words.

I know you didn't start this as a thread to discuss 750 word stories as a whole, but I think this point truly needs highlighting.

Because it's something so many writers miss when attempting the challenge.
 
I know you didn't start this as a thread to discuss 750 word stories as a whole, but I think this point truly needs highlighting.
Fine to do so - the intent of these (if I understand @StillStunned properly) is just to promote discussions about writing.
Because it's something so many writers miss when attempting the challenge.
Yeah - I’ve seen it a lot. Try to fit a 3,000 word story into 750 and it’s going to show.

I think very targeted goals are necessary.

Emily
 
Fine to do so - the intent of these (if I understand @StillStunned properly) is just to promote discussions about writing.
You understand me!

ETA:
In the same way as with my WIWAW article about writing A Hard Day’s Night, I won’t totally follow @StillStunned’s more analytical template, but I hope that this is still in his intended spirit.
Very much the intended spirit. I have to admit that I'd like more WIWAWs to go into this level of detail about the technical aspects of what we've written, so we could have more discussions on that level. But the whole concept is in its infancy, and maybe it will evolve.

Also, I want to take the opportunity to make a joke about putting the "anal" in "analytical".
 
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