Readers' inappropriate reaction

[BaherOlwy]

An incomplete Arabic erotic story by an anonymous writer in a certain Arabic forum about a brother who lived with his younger sister and he had sex with his neighbor's wife, and they had been caught by the husband, the husband under gunpoint made the brother deflower his sister, and it ends with the husband shot and kill the sister the wife and himself but a friend of mine undid this ending and he completed it after this the sister have sex with her lover her colleague in college then she left him and had polyamorous sex with several men with full consent, some readers cursed my friend and admonished him that he should make her repent or make her brother kill her in honor and the admin conspired with them to move my friend's completed story to the section of deleted topics. What do you think about this ?

 

[JillPaula]

I think you should invest in some punctuation.

 

[Shaglus_Ziegler]

An incomplete Arabic erotic story by an anonymous writer in a certain Arabic forum about a brother who lived with his younger sister and he had sex with his neighbor's wife, and they had been caught by the husband, the husband under gunpoint made the brother deflower his sister, and it ends with the husband shot and kill the sister the wife and himself but a friend of mine undid this ending and he completed it after this the sister have sex with her lover her colleague in college then she left him and had polyamorous sex with several men with full consent, some readers cursed my friend and admonished him that he should make her repent or make her brother kill her in honor and the admin conspired with them to move my friend's completed story to the section of deleted topics. What do you think about this ?

Just kind of grim. Not sexy for me.

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

I think you should invest in some punctuation.

I don't know. I counted four commas, one full-stop and a question mark. What more do you need?

 

[LustyScribe]

I don't know. I counted four commas, one full-stop and a question mark. What more do you need?

The vast majority of the story is what is referred to as a run-on sentence. Breaking it up into smaller sentence, rather than just phrases, would make it easier to read. I hope that clears it up for you.

In terms of the story, rape, murder and "killing in honor" are generally offensive to many cultures. That's probably why it got deleted, but that's just my guess.

 

[live4thebj]

An incomplete Arabic erotic story by an anonymous writer in a certain Arabic forum about a brother who lived with his younger sister and he had sex with his neighbor's wife, and they had been caught by the husband, the husband under gunpoint made the brother deflower his sister, and it ends with the husband shot and kill the sister the wife and himself but a friend of mine undid this ending and he completed it after this the sister have sex with her lover her colleague in college then she left him and had polyamorous sex with several men with full consent, some readers cursed my friend and admonished him that he should make her repent or make her brother kill her in honor and the admin conspired with them to move my friend's completed story to the section of deleted topics. What do you think about this ?

I think you should realize this is a porn site and if you are this troubled by what happens here then you need to take another look at your life.

 

[TARDISCapricorn]

I think you should invest in some punctuation.

I agree. Run on sentences are simply an abomination...

 

[OlderFitterWiser]

I have noticed some readers take characters seriously to the point of offering advice or even abuse at certain characters or the writer.

As a result I'm slightly more sensitive as to what I include in my stories. Not because I'm worried about the readers biases, but because these stories are written for people to enjoy.