cheekygirl75
Brains of the Outfit
- Joined
- Oct 17, 2005
- Posts
- 19,920
I don't know how coherent this is going to be, but it's something I've been thinking of recently. I know I've posted before about my depression, which has gotten especially bad this past year. And I've never had a ton of self confidence. So basically those two things combined have led to constantly feeling like there's nothing really to look forward to, that my life is always going to be the struggle that it is. And I'm never going to meet anyone or even have friendships like I did in the past when other people my age were single. Even if I tried to meet new people, why would they bother getting attached to me? There's nothing that I could give them that others couldn't, plus I come with these fun mental health issues.
Anyway, that's where my mind's been at, and so I was reading some old threads here about shyness, self confidence, etc. And I saw a lot of great advice about believing in oneself, not looking to other people for a sense of self worth, and so on. But I have to wonder, what is it that makes someone go from having no self confidence, most likely because they were put down or teased or something for a large part of their life, to saying, all that life has taught me up until now is wrong, something inside me is instead telling me that I'm not what everything else has said. I am better or smarter or more attractive or whatever. Is it all to do with brain chemicals? Or is there a part of the brain that is developed in other people that hasn't developed in people with no self confidence? And if so, can it be developed as an adult - like a blind person getting surgery to be able to see having to learn to use his eyes? Or is it something else completely?
I said "philosophic & psychologic roots" in the title because both of those fields don't really have concrete answers. I think there probably aren't any concrete answers, but there are always lots of thoughtful replies on here, so I was curious to see what some other perspectives are.
Anyway, that's where my mind's been at, and so I was reading some old threads here about shyness, self confidence, etc. And I saw a lot of great advice about believing in oneself, not looking to other people for a sense of self worth, and so on. But I have to wonder, what is it that makes someone go from having no self confidence, most likely because they were put down or teased or something for a large part of their life, to saying, all that life has taught me up until now is wrong, something inside me is instead telling me that I'm not what everything else has said. I am better or smarter or more attractive or whatever. Is it all to do with brain chemicals? Or is there a part of the brain that is developed in other people that hasn't developed in people with no self confidence? And if so, can it be developed as an adult - like a blind person getting surgery to be able to see having to learn to use his eyes? Or is it something else completely?
I said "philosophic & psychologic roots" in the title because both of those fields don't really have concrete answers. I think there probably aren't any concrete answers, but there are always lots of thoughtful replies on here, so I was curious to see what some other perspectives are.