Is it possible to find a connection here?

[NKNE]

This may be somewhat of a philosophical question of sorts:

Is it possible to actually make a lifelong connection with people on this site?
Or
Is this site, by design, just meant to provide a sanctuary for only temporary connections and online debauchery.
What are your thoughts?

 

[HumpDayHoratio]

Some of the old timers will tell of Lit generated marriages. I guess then the answer would be yes.

My anecdotal evidence is some limited real connections, mainly in the form of comparing our relationships with our spouses. Two good deep dive types into our kinks (all males) and one very special deeply emotional one with a female. That unfortunately has started to cool.

I enjoy my time here but I think you nailed it. It’s probably short term and debauchery for most. I’d be interested to hear from others who’ve connected on a more than short term type relationship.

 

[positiveflirt]

I think it's mostly you get out what you put in, but with a big dash of luck. There are plenty of people here who found dates in real life, others have totally found love (of varying degrees), and wherever that exists there's a chance of something long, long term.

But short term much, much, much more common for obvious reasons

 

[patient1]

This may be somewhat of a philosophical question of sorts:

Is it possible to actually make a lifelong connection with people on this site?
Or
Is this site, by design, just meant to provide a sanctuary for only temporary connections and online debauchery.
What are your thoughts?

It is possible. My wife and I met here and have been happily married for almost 20 years. We were both very candid here, and found that we agreed on almost everything, and that didn't change in personal messages or in Real Life.

There have always been people trying to [EDIT live] out a fantasy life here, and doing a lot of fabricating. I never understood that, when we always had a role-playing forum for the purpose, and there plenty of amateur nudes on another forum.

I think by design the General Board was meant to be a sort of salon for open minded people, back before there were so many forums and sub-forums.

While I've always said that the board is what you make of it, it's not the same as it was 20 years ago. We've accumulated alts, resident trolls and rules. There are established adversaries. It tends to inhibit candor, and people are afraid anything they say can and will be used against them in the future. Not only is the board different, America is. That polarization spills over. 20 years ago we were a lot more respectful of each other's opinions, and liked people we disagreed with.

As for lifelong connections, I think I had real life interactions with 31 people at the peak. Only connected with a few after that. By that I mean beyond the internet- that I met in person, usually for dinner, or talked on the telephone, invited to my wedding, did business with them, mailed stuff to their home when they were in need after a fire or divorce, those kinds of things. But in the long term people die. They also have a tendency to get engaged and decide to cut ties with the website and the people they know from it so as to avoid awkward explanations and suspicions. I hope they are all living happily ever after.

On the whole, I imagine the Literotica Forums have led to more divorces than marriages. I hope you can be honest about who you are, what you want, and find it, whether that's here or in your real life.

 

[Seadog777]

Highly unlikely.

In the words of the iconic "American Dream" Dusty Rhodes.....

"I think there be a lot a bullshit going on round here"

 

[Herkermer2]

I’ve met people from here, but it seems most that seem interested, and want to chat, really just want to “know what I’d do to them if”. Or they start this unrealistic story, hoping I’m stupid and hoping I’ll play along, or they believe I’m stupid and I’ll believe their story as their real life. But then I think, we’ll if I was that stupid i would’ve believed the first example.

 

[Rob_Royale]

I've had friends fall in love playing video games thousands of miles apart. Falling in love in a place where intimate dialog is the norm seems a no brainer.

 

[live4thebj]

This may be somewhat of a philosophical question of sorts:

Is it possible to actually make a lifelong connection with people on this site?
Or
Is this site, by design, just meant to provide a sanctuary for only temporary connections and online debauchery.
What are your thoughts?

There is your real life then there is your life on the site. Real life tend to take priority. Better question is it possible you meet someone through this site? I would say yes but a woman looking to meet someone would be swarmed with interesting parties.

 

[pink]

Connections??? Which type???

Friendships, yes.
Love? It's slim but yes.

 

[live4thebj]

Depends on what you consider a connection. I had a short lived back and forth conversation with this mom. I just hope the things she told me were true because it was hot.

 

[Ssbbw4u1974]

Definitely yes

 

[Noor]

Yes, it is possible. I did and I have friends here who have also. I’ve also made friends through here in too. Though a few people I have met from here have died. That happens in rl too.
Many of us old litsers have met other Litsers in real life but I don’t know about the future. Lit has changed over time, there is a lot less laughter.

 

[Michael682]

Definitely yes

What she said.

 

[Bob_Bytchin]

Is it possible to find something meaningful here? A big YES.

I'm ashamed to say that I had met a few women through Lit with all the best intentions. But I could never get past circumstances that prevented it from becoming more.

I had kids, so there was no way I was uprooting. And really, that's what it all comes down to, you have to be free of ties.

 

[Ssbbw4u1974]

Is it possible to find something meaningful here? A big YES.

I'm ashamed to say that I had met a few women through Lit with all the best intentions. But I could never get past circumstances that prevented it from becoming more.

I had kids, so there was no way I was uprooting. And really, that's what it all comes down to, you have to be free of ties.

I have online only friendships/dynamics. I have a complicated personal life that prevents me from being with someone IRL and I'm 1000% ok with that.
In return, I'd never expect or want a relationship to become in person.
That's just me, though...

 

[Dubinsky]

I've met scores of people on Lit I think of as "acquaintances," several I think of as "close," and a few that I think of as lifelong connections. These are friends in every sense of the word (other than proximity). So yes, it certainly does happen; it depends what you're open for.

 

[Bisexguy70]

I have online only friendships/dynamics. I have a complicated personal life that prevents me from being with someone IRL and I'm 1000% ok with that.
In return, I'd never expect or want a relationship to become in person.
That's just me, though...

Worse case, your introduced to ones sexual mind. I sometimes look at a persons bio and read about them. In this case, i followed a link to your stories. I think i have some hot reading and jerking off in the very near future. So even though we dont meet IRL, its fun to explore the minds of others about their inner sexual desires and fantasies.

 

[Ssbbw4u1974]

Worse case, your introduced to ones sexual mind. I sometimes look at a persons bio and read about them. In this case, i followed a link to your stories. I think i have some hot reading and jerking off in the very near future. So even though we dont meet IRL, its fun to explore the minds of others about their inner sexual desires and fantasies.

I really hope they help you in pleasuring yourself

 

[Bisexguy70]

I really hope they help you in pleasuring yourself

Isnt that the point of writing erotica? Do you think about all the people who might read it and get off? To me its like having sexual interaction with someone without physically being there. Stimulation of the mind is an incredible gift. As ive written to others, just the thoughts put on paper get my blood pumping.

 

[Nudist_Couple]

It is possible to make real connections with people here. But it's about like minded people... Sure you have temporary connections and plenty of debauchery!

I/We have met some for online (fun) and have met others for real time (fun). Some are very short term but a few are more long term. When like minded people meet up here, it can certainly lead to something more.

 

[WSM98]

If you're looking for a lasting connection, my knee-jerk response is to say, "no."
Hell no.
But the fact of the matter is, I have met 1 very special person on here. And the idiots that came after him can't undo this fact, even though they're working overtime to make me hate interacting on Lit.
If you can find that sweet spot where assholes, racists, and sexists just don't message you, then yeah, I'm sure you could have a grand ol' time here & connect meaningfully.

 

[Plasmaball]

It is possible. My wife and I met here and have been happily married for almost 20 years. We were both very candid here, and found that we agreed on almost everything, and that didn't change in personal messages or in Real Life.

There have always been people trying to [EDIT live] out a fantasy life here, and doing a lot of fabricating. I never understood that, when we always had a role-playing forum for the purpose, and there plenty of amateur nudes on another forum.

I think by design the General Board was meant to be a sort of salon for open minded people, back before there were so many forums and sub-forums.

While I've always said that the board is what you make of it, it's not the same as it was 20 years ago. We've accumulated alts, resident trolls and rules. There are established adversaries. It tends to inhibit candor, and people are afraid anything they say can and will be used against them in the future. Not only is the board different, America is. That polarization spills over. 20 years ago we were a lot more respectful of each other's opinions, and liked people we disagreed with.

That's not the gb I remember. You had to have thick skin here to post.

As for lifelong connections, I think I had real life interactions with 31 people at the peak. Only connected with a few after that. By that I mean beyond the internet- that I met in person, usually for dinner, or talked on the telephone, invited to my wedding, did business with them, mailed stuff to their home when they were in need after a fire or divorce, those kinds of things. But in the long term people die. They also have a tendency to get engaged and decide to cut ties with the website and the people they know from it so as to avoid awkward explanations and suspicions. I hope they are all living happily ever after.

On the whole, I imagine the Literotica Forums have led to more divorces than marriages. I hope you can be honest about who you are, what you want, and find it, whether that's here or in your real life.

 

[Plasmaball]

This may be somewhat of a philosophical question of sorts:

Is it possible to actually make a lifelong connection with people on this site?
Or
Is this site, by design, just meant to provide a sanctuary for only temporary connections and online debauchery.
What are your thoughts?

Yes. The answer is yes no and maybe.
You have everything here from long lasting love to one nighters. You have 2 week burn outs and long relationships that eventually stop..

This site I'd designed for whatever you want to get out of it. You want to troll people? You can. You want to talk about politics or porn? You can.
That's the one thing that hasn't changed get about here. The people have though and the layout.

If this was the old gb this section wouldnt exist and the front page of the gb wouldn't be filled with so much porn.

 

[Justhappytobealive]

67230

 

[AnnieLit]

Everything is possible.

In my 4.5 years here I have made 3 meaningful sexual connections and two non-sexual.
The first one lasted 2 months and I ended it - I didn't like the direction it was going in.
The second one was going on for 3 months and we even briefly met in person. That one ended because our end goals didn't match (I wanted more, he was open to less)
The third one started 4 years ago and is still going strong. I hope we will eventually take it offline, but there is a lot of crazy logistics involved in making that happen. (My advice - stay away from people that happen to live on the other end of the world. You fall in love and ... can't do a thing about it. )

The two non-sexual ones - I consider those two people my friends and if I ever need a lit related advice, they are going to be my sounding boards.