Divine Secrets of the Waa-Waa Brotherhood

Le Jacquelope

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It was a gut wrenching time for neo conservative America. They were still stinging from the election time ass kickings of 2005, and worse yet, Shrubya's ratings were rock bottom.

Fox News polls were showing that ever since Hurricane Katrina swept away Dubya's credibility, Americans wanted more Democrats in office than Republicans. But that wasn't all. FEMA's former chief, Mr. Brown, having had his ass handed to him by Republicans in Congress for passing the blame for the Katrina disaster to the other people, had turned on his leaders like a rabid dog, ratting them out before Congress. Consumer confidence was down, and civil war was breaking out in Iraq. Bush's domestic spying and the selling out of America's ports to Saudi Arabia was making Americans very angry, and now most Americans no longer supported the Iraq war. There were troops coming back from Iraq and savagely beating down their wives in cold blood and a quarter of a million homeless vets that neo cons couldn't give a shit about. Most Americans, especially the elderly, despised the new Medicare system, and Bush's draconian Social Security overhaul, once having been on the ropes, had just been finally carried out of Congress on a stretcher.

With drug prices on the rise for the poor, neo conservative America was finding it ever harder to afford their Paxil, Zoloft and Prozac prescriptions.

Faced with the prospect of committing suicide or seeing noted nutcases like busybody going on homicidal rampages against fellow citizens, a band of heroes came together and formed the Waa Waa Brotherhood.

Founded by Ishmael, the King of all Bluster and his native America hating domestic partner Cap'n Amatrixca, the Waa Waa Brotherhood met in 2006.

Ishmael calls for bombarding liberals with baseless and unprovable facts, and whenever someone countered a neo con with documentation proving him wrong, he accuses them of going off topic as a way of saving face.

Cap'n Amatrixca is the Ostrich King of the Waa Waa Brotherhood. When the facts show that his ideology is leading America into ruin, he accuses his detractors of being chicken littles, and demands America continue its lemming-like stampede to the edge of fiscal and military disaster. He also declares that whenever a neo con is backed into a corner, they should hurl a racial slur to get their opposition angry, and then accuse them of being childish for becoming hostile at neo cons for hurling racial slurs.

Catfish came up with the idea of whining to one's mommy whenever liberals launched personal attacks against neo conservatives, while ignoring the barrage of impotent racism and random idiotic insults neo cons had been throwing at liberals for years beforehand. He also patented the idea of jumping into fights that he wasn't involved in, and then claiming that didn't amount to starting something with someone.

Busybody is the best one for deploying the strategy of cutting and pasting piles of text from right wing nutjob websites with zero credibility, and following up on it with a barrage of racist hate speech, or words not used by most people since the 3rd grade. Note that to make fun of his wording is highly intolerant - his vocabulary is college grade prose where he was raised.

Garbage Can taught his troops how to discredit all documentation as having come from some left wing blog. If it came from CNN or MSNBC, it's a left wing blog. The counterattack for him is to post damning proof from some place like Fox News or WorldNetDaily, which he cannot pass off as a left wing blog. This, of course, makes him very desperate and depressed, at which time he turns to the medications offered by...

... LeahLo519. She provides the Waa Waa brotherhood with tons of weed, plus many entertaining bedtime conspiracy stories about the Government's involvement with pot. But in her great wisdom she invented a powerful defense for neo conservatives that have saved many of their lives; her brand of mary jane causes memory loss. This defense against the endless barrage of traumatic memories that neo conservatives collect in their ill begotten crusade, has saved far too many from descending into suicidal depression or homicidal mania. Her herbal remedies are especially helpful to another fellow named...

... BlueEyesInLevis, who, between his visits to NAMBLA, is currently working on a perfect personal ad scheme for neo conservatives to find what few women out there remain that don't yet despise their Sado-Quixotic crusades to find their lost masculinity. He and Cap'n Amatrixca have something going on on the down low, which may put him at odds with Ishmael.

Armchair Brigadier General dead.jihadist wages an endless war against Muslims via his blog, and is relentlessly bugging Congress to equate online tirades against Muslims and liberals, with actual military service. Amazingly enough, he has received quite an audience with Congressional Republicans, many of whom are themselves draft dodgers and chickenhawks.

Slowlane is from the old school, and prefers simpler tactics. He is the master of using reading comprehension problems to shield his rabid rhetoric from the crushing might of documented facts and the harsh light of reality.

Gringao is another old schooler. He is the master of the "Bright Boy" insult. When documented facts dispel his rhetoric he changes the subject or pretends he never read it. When a really tough argument is put his way, he is the master of the "he who fights and runs away..." tactic.


The Waa Waa Brotherhood has a long track record of battling reality and in their minds winning. Know their tactics and you may survive the day!
 
Agents also predict a conflict between Ishmael, who believes Republicans are making inroads with blacks, and junior recruit and busybody protege' Cade Is Here, who is set to take over busybody's moonlighting position of Grand Dragon of the General Board branch of the Ku Klux Klan. This would make Cade Is Here the fourth man to hold this position, after busybody, who succeeded Cap'n Amatrixca, who succeeded WARMACHINE after a black man scared him out of Texas and off the GB forever.
 
Damn....what a great thread title! :D

*files that one away for future reference*
 
RobDownSouth said:
Damn....what a great thread title! :D

*files that one away for future reference*
:D

Ishmael is also the master of putting his opposition on ignore when they prove too good at debate for his high school stunts to counteract.

Vetteman is very good at bullshitting his way through debates, but is highly susceptible to having his bluff called.


Lavared, meanwhile, has been denied admittance to the Waa Waa Brotherhood because membership therein requires a certain minimum level of cotton candy growing in one's cranium.
 
Ham Murabi is known as the Juggernaut. When his arguments are thoroughly refuted, he just brings them back up incessantly, and then goes off the deep end. His tirades defending 11 hour driving schedules for truck drivers are the stuff of legends at the asylum.
 
Lavared is pretty fair minded when it comes to debates. Nice lady too.
 
Phrodeau is an honorary member. He invented, and then taught Worm, the technique of making a snide and horribly inaccurate remark, and then disappearing when called upon it, all the while bragging about "getting the other guy's goat". He has many students of his technique.

Bent learned from Cap'n Amatrixca, and has improved on his technique. It posts from several identities at once and even has a make believe husband for support. Bent is also known as the "Class Clone"...

khadijah_haqq2.jpg
 
LovingTongue said:
Phrodeau is an honorary member. He invented, and then taught Worm, the technique of making a snide and horribly inaccurate remark, and then disappearing when called upon it, all the while bragging about "getting the other guy's goat". He has many students of his technique.

Bent learned from Cap'n Amatrixca, and has improved on his technique. It posts from several identities at once and even has a make believe husband for support. Bent is also known as the "Class Clone"...

khadijah_haqq2.jpg

Yes, Bent and her famous "pole to follow". :rolleyes:
 
LovingTongue said:
. He also patented the idea of jumping into fights that he wasn't involved in, and then claiming that didn't amount to starting something with someone.

!

whine

Main Entry: 1whine
Pronunciation: 'hwIn, 'wIn
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): whined; whin·ing
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English hwInan to whiz; akin to Old Norse hvIna to whiz
intransitive senses
1 a : to utter a high-pitched plaintive or distressed cry b : to make a sound similar to such a cry <the wind whined in the chimney>
2 : to complain with or as if with a whine

Yeah, I think the above fits the definition.
 
Last edited:
catfish said:
whine

Main Entry: 1whine
Pronunciation: 'hwIn, 'wIn
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): whined; whin·ing
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English hwInan to whiz; akin to Old Norse hvIna to whiz
intransitive senses
1 a : to utter a high-pitched plaintive or distressed cry b : to make a sound similar to such a cry <the wind whined in the chimney>
2 : to complain with or as if with a whine

Yeah, I think the above fits the definition.

Hey at least you made the list.
 
bill-pix-trade said:
Hey at least you made the list.

I know, I should be thankful, but I was hoping it would be by some hot girl who wanted me, not on LT's list of guys I think he has a crush on.
 
catfish said:
whine

Main Entry: 1whine
Pronunciation: 'hwIn, 'wIn
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): whined; whin·ing
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English hwInan to whiz; akin to Old Norse hvIna to whiz
intransitive senses
1 a : to utter a high-pitched plaintive or distressed cry b : to make a sound similar to such a cry <the wind whined in the chimney>
2 : to complain with or as if with a whine

Yeah, I think the above fits the definition.
That's the problem. You don't think. That wasn't even in the same universe as a complaint. That was making fun of you. I'd call it one of your many character flaws, but that would be inaccurate - you don't have any character for there to be any flaws.
 
LovingTongue said:
That's the problem. You don't think. That wasn't even in the same universe as a complaint. That was making fun of you. I'd call it one of your many character flaws, but that would be inaccurate - you don't have any character for there to be any flaws.
Sounds like a whine to me, yep.
 
phrodeau said:
Sounds like a whine to me, yep.

Look, LT doesn't whine or make personal attacks without provocation, just ask him.
 
catfish said:
Look, LT doesn't whine or make personal attacks without provocation, just ask him.
Look, catfish re-defines whining to include people making fun of him! And whines about it some more afterwards!
 
catfish said:
I know, I should be thankful, but I was hoping it would be by some hot girl who wanted me, not on LT's list of guys I think he has a crush on.
Start small and work your way up.
 
DevilishTexan brings to the Waa Waa Brotherhood his family's top security clearance. He frightens the hell out of his opponents by threatening to use his family's clearance to find them in real life. The key to fending him off? Call his bluff.
 
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