An Election special coming to all of America

lovecraft68

Bad Doggie
Joined
Jul 13, 2009
Posts
42,042
Another exciting election year on the state and local levels, but let's face it, these are no where near as fun as a presidential election the entire country can be a part of as their parties representatives square off.

We can't elect a president this time, but I feel we Americans deserve something that pits both parties against each other on a national level. So I now bring you a special(in every way) election event.

Who do we have that is so prestigious they'd qualify for this event?

Well.....in this corner, wearing the red trunks we have the GOP's new shining stars.
First in the ring is from the Oprah launched my career party! That's right folks, the GOP is coming in fast and hot with Doctor OZ, aka Dr. Phil 2.0!
Followed into the ring by his partner, Hershel "I don't believe in abortion unless I'm paying for them' Walker!
One couldn't beat an unfortunate stroke victim the other couldn't wrap up a win because he obviously can't wrap anything up, they're here and they're ready to redeem themselves.

But, LC, who the hell could possibly take on this not so dynamic duo you ask? I mean, this will be lambs to the slaughter! No one on the other side could even think of matching these titans of the political arena.

I'd agree, but I just heard the DNC declare hold my soy beer poured by a guy with a man bun, because now entering the ring in the blue trunks, I present to you none other than:

Beta "I thought it was appropriate to walk into a press conference minutes after children were killed and start making it all about me" Rourke. This man will take an opponents breath away faster than he'll take your guns and millions of his parties money.

Now Beto, shows he's a gentlemen by holding the ropes open for his partner, the woman who puts the bomb in bomb bastic! Introducing Stacy Abrams! That's right Miss, "Voter suppression laws in an election that featured record turn out, and the best race baiter since the good rev Sharpton himself is here and she's hungry...well, when isn't she, but this time its for victory!

These two time big time losers are putting it all on the line(and taking more party money) to go against The mega maga endorsed men who still think they're in the OR and the football field in this run off(as in please run off) event

All we know for sure is that whoever you vote for? They're going to lose because its all any of them know.

Now get out to the polls and vote for the people your party, with a straight face, thought could win.
 
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This was so long. I did read the last sentence. Are you talking about the run off? Or was this a late post?
 
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