Am I The Cheater?

[emma_the_librarian]

Am I considered a cheater if I'm not the one in the relationship?

 

[SgtSpiderMan]

Am I considered a cheater if I'm not the one in the relationship?

I think we need a little more information.

 

[Wings]

Are you aware your partner is in a relationship?

 

[Fierywhore]

Great question.... If the 'It takes two to tango' is in play then I guess at best you are complicit in the cheating taking place

 

[emma_the_librarian]

I'm asking generally, not specifically about my own situation.

 

[The_Highwayman]

In general my Golden Rule is "If you have to ask..."

If you are doing something of a sexual nature that you fee the need to hide, it's cheating. But you don't seem to be describing that.

So no I'd say in your hypothetical you would be a party to it or an enabler of it, but that's mostly semantics.

 

[RjThoughts]

Am I considered a cheater if I'm not the one in the relationship?

No, but some on Lit will call you a "Jezebel"

 

[LiFeNdEaTh]

nope...

 

[emma_the_librarian]

No, but some on Lit will call you a "Jezebel"

I quit like that...

I haven't cheated when I was the one in the relationship.
And I used to have a rule about married men, but in the end I figured, it's his baggage to carry.
And if they're married, I only borrow, never steal. Though I know I'm not saving my soul on that tidbit, ha ha.

Jezebel...I think I'm keeping that one.

 

[RjThoughts]

I quit like that...

I haven't cheated when I was the one in the relationship.
And I used to have a rule about married men, but in the end I figured, it's his baggage to carry.
And if they're married, I only borrow, never steal. Though I know I'm not saving my soul on that tidbit, ha ha.

Jezebel...I think I'm keeping that one.

LOL I like the line, "Borrow"

 

[drinkz]

......

 

[oggbashan]

Am I considered a cheater if I'm not the one in the relationship?

With the name "emma the librarian" everyone *knows* you are just waiting to take off your sensible glasses and grab the nearest man.

You are assumed to be guilty even if all you do is remove your glasses.

All lady librarians are man-hunters pretending not to be...

 

[yossi]

If you aren't in a relationship than you aren't cheating on anyone and therefore can't be a cheater.

You're just the person having sex with the cheater. Cheatee, mayhaps?

 

[emma_the_librarian]

With the name "emma the librarian" everyone *knows* you are just waiting to take off your sensible glasses and grab the nearest man.

You are assumed to be guilty even if all you do is remove your glasses.

All lady librarians are man-hunters pretending not to be...

Of course. I knew that Gladys had something up her 80-year-old sleeve.

If you aren't in a relationship than you aren't cheating on anyone and therefore can't be a cheater.

You're just the person having sex with the cheater. Cheatee, mayhaps?

Hmm, not an improvement, sadly.

 

[bronzeage]

I quit like that...

I haven't cheated when I was the one in the relationship.
And I used to have a rule about married men, but in the end I figured, it's his baggage to carry.
And if they're married, I only borrow, never steal. Though I know I'm not saving my soul on that tidbit, ha ha.

Jezebel...I think I'm keeping that one.

Cheating is a matter of inclination and opportunity. There are a lot of faithful people who just never had the chance. They want to, but the risk is too great. Give them something safe and easy and they won't think twice.

This makes you the enabler, not that there is anything wrong with that.

 

[Mr Noone]

...You're just the person having sex with the cheater. Cheatee, mayhaps?

...Hmm, not an improvement, sadly.

It's better than cheet-o.

 

[oggbashan]

Of course. I knew that Gladys had something up her 80-year-old sleeve.

...

At last, a woman of an appropriate age!

 

[emma_the_librarian]

Cheating is a matter of inclination and opportunity. There are a lot of faithful people who just never had the chance. They want to, but the risk is too great. Give them something safe and easy and they won't think twice.

This makes you the enabler, not that there is anything wrong with that.

Lovely. Now I'm co-dependent. This is why I prefer open relationships, sweep all this stuff away...

 

[parodyluvr75]

Lovely. Now I'm co-dependent. This is why I prefer open relationships, sweep all this stuff away...

Maybe you're thinking about it too much. You shouldn't be committed to someone who has another long term partner.

 

[emma_the_librarian]

Maybe you're thinking about it too much. You shouldn't be committed to someone who has another long term partner.

Now that's that truth. I am not. 2014 is my "year of the non-boyfriend."

 

[StrangeLife]

Only the one who promised fidelity to a partner is the cheater. But alas the other person is often the one who end up getting shot by the angry spouse....

 

[bronzeage]

Lovely. Now I'm co-dependent. This is why I prefer open relationships, sweep all this stuff away...

You're only a codependent if you get off on the fact he is cheating on his wife.

It's much more likely you prefer the limits of the relationship, which give you physical intimacy, but limits the emotional involvement and also give you a quick way out, whenever you want.

I'm just guessing here.

 

[emma_the_librarian]

Only the one who promised fidelity to a partner is the cheater. But alas the other person is often the one who end up getting shot by the angry spouse....

*closing my legs and slinking away...

 

[parodyluvr75]

Now that's that truth. I am not. 2014 is my "year of the non-boyfriend."

I find that not bathing and shaving keeps men away, if that doesn't work, I hear pepper spray and tazers are good.

 

[emma_the_librarian]

I find that not bathing and shaving keeps men away, if that doesn't work, I hear pepper spray and tazers are good.

Oh I needn't do that. I am my own best repellant. And not on purpose.