a haiku is more than 5-7-5

[cascadiabound]

your poetry never offends x

it's just a bugbear of mine, that people demand i acknowledge their poems as 'traditional haiku' when they just are not

i always enjoy reading your poetry and it often leaves me in awe, as it continues to resonate across the spaces of my mind (some would say empty!) long after the moment of reading the words.

i'm happy you take my comments in the spirit they are intended: with honesty and purely from my own perspective, offered as a measure for you to see how your word choices (etc...,) impact this one reader.

this forum has helped us all, and continues to do so!

It is a wonder to me my poetry resonates past reading. It is extremely gratifying that my words ever do.

An additional comment on my foggy haiku...
I was intending a layered meaning of the word muted... muted visually, muted mind, muted voice, muted/muffled sound (which seems to accompany fog in my experience)

Where I live, fog is highly seasonal and most common in winter so it is an appropriate choice for a traditional haiku I thought.

 

[cascadiabound]

My mahonia
Sprays of bright yellow blossoms-
Hummingbird visits

 

[Mrtenant]

Interim
Intermixed interests
Interpretation

 

[HarryHill]

Chaos transmission
Oozing from the cracks above
infected forum

 

[Mrtenant]

Cuddles and snoozing
Sleepy fondles and kisses
Deep sleep together

 

[cascadiabound]

Take my hand darling
Let's go for a road trip luv
Red car rocking out

 

[butters]

lone stiff tree
march winds in february
—snap

 

[AlinaX]

crack of a whip -
a birch tree sings its future

 

[HarryHill]

Winter dies faded
Blooms of fuchsia and golden
A hint of springtime

 

[Broken_paladin]

Summers getting so hot
Time to plant my pot
About 75 days to harvest a lot

 

[AlinaX]

watch the earth baking
beneath summer's insistence
of a last hurrah

 

[DarkOfWrite]

As a newbie here who enjoys writing haiku and particularly senryu with a sensual or vaguely erotic theme, this was an informative thread to read. I did like the contributions too.

As I mentioned on another thread where I asked the best place to post, I'm looking for feedback. Help me grow!

Moon rises above
She is naked to the world
An ageless beauty

 

[AlinaX]

With the caveat that I'm not a haiku expert, just someone who writes and enjoys them...

It shouldn't feel like three connected statements, but more like one-maybe-two with a twist.

moon clothed in beauty
her silver threads unravelled
by brambled woods

Also, the 5-7-5 can be a fun challenge, but don't let it get in the way of a superior poem.

 

[DarkOfWrite]

With the caveat that I'm not a haiku expert, just someone who writes and enjoys them...

It shouldn't feel like three connected statements, but more like one-maybe-two with a twist.

moon clothed in beauty
her silver threads unravelled
by brambled woods

Also, the 5-7-5 can be a fun challenge, but don't let it get in the way of a superior poem.

I like that, thank you.