"To keep the review thread clean..."

Thank you for the mention Angeline ...... it's been a while

Angeline said:

You can always post your poems on the forum and ask for feedback if you want. People do that all the time and though you may not get as many views here, you'll probably get more detailed feedback. That's not really a solution, I know, but more of a work-around.

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I will keep that in mind. Thank you. I think that most of the comments I receive on my poetry comes from the forum regulars anyways. Perhaps this would be the better venue for the overall evolution of my work. Which thread would I post under? I wouldn't want to clutter a thread inappropriately. Thank you for the advice, I appreciate it.

wakingDown said:

I will keep that in mind. Thank you. I think that most of the comments I receive on my poetry comes from the forum regulars anyways. Perhaps this would be the better venue for the overall evolution of my work. Which thread would I post under? I wouldn't want to clutter a thread inappropriately. Thank you for the advice, I appreciate it.

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You can make your own thread. From the main forum page just click on the "new thread" box in the upper left of the screen. That brings up a screen with a reply box and you write like you would any post. Just make sure you put a title on it and when you click the submit reply, you'll get a message that you are being taken to the thread and your thread is on the forum. If you say in the title that you want feedback, you'll probably get more of it.

Thank you to Todski for the mention and comments also the comments from Oneiria, Angeline, Tzara and Harry. Hope everyone got the significance of *Down* on the shore? #smirk

UnderYourSpell said:

Thank you to Todski for the mention and comments also the comments from Oneiria, Angeline, Tzara and Harry. Hope everyone got the significance of *Down* on the shore? #smirk

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I did not but that's because where I grew up everyone referred to visiting the beach as going "down the shore." Really! In fact, when I read the poem I thought "how did she know about that?" I guess New Jersey is a naturally pervy place.

Angeline said:

I did not but that's because where I grew up everyone referred to visiting the beach as going "down the shore." Really! In fact, when I read the poem I thought "how did she know about that?" I guess New Jersey is a naturally pervy place.

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I was going to call it 'Going down on the shore' but decided not

Interesting. I just noticed I have 69 submissions. That seems somehow... symbolic.

Anyway, thanks to todski for recommending the poem and to all who left comments and/or voted, including Angie, Annie, oneiria, and (again) todski.

As Ange notes, this is an older poem I came across the other day while I was looking through my Pile of Old Poems. I think it was originally posted to one of the threads here. I do not remember which.

I changed a couple of the verbs to be more active and filed it here so I knew where it was. (I don't want any of my poems wandering about loose after curfew, y'know).

As oneiria points out, some of the references are to parapsychological topics from Russia that are some four decades in the past. I plead advanced age. At least my long-term memory is still OK.

Thanks, all.

Angeline said:

You can make your own thread. From the main forum page just click on the "new thread" box in the upper left of the screen. That brings up a screen with a reply box and you write like you would any post. Just make sure you put a title on it and when you click the submit reply, you'll get a message that you are being taken to the thread and your thread is on the forum. If you say in the title that you want feedback, you'll probably get more of it.

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Okay, thank you. I'll probably start doing that, see if I am comfortable with it.

I wanted to thank Angeline and todski for their comments on Fast Rage, and maybe talk a bit about it, if you are okay with that.

Thannk You All so much!

I took my first flight on a plane last week. Before I boarded I took a valium. I was horrified even though I know it is the safest way to travel. I am still in the process of helping my daughter move from Illinois to Florida and the process seems endless.

I am overwhelmed to the point of tears at the response to the two poems I posted before I left,

Angeline, 1201, Neo, everyone who read and commented on my poems, I thank you so much, for taking the time to read me.

I have a set of the "elements" poems I worked on them a long time and they still need work. And I LOVE, desire nd welcome constructive FB. HarryHill and Tess both pointed out some things that could be modified and improved and to me, that is what Lit is supposed to be about.

Red Bricks was actually accepted to Hiss Quarterly, which, sadly is no longer online and I had the honor of sharing the page with Miss Annaswirls poem, "Scrabble, Muttered". You may have guessed the title of that issue, or not, but it was titled, "sanity is a one trick pony" of course they would accept me in an issue about sanity or the lack thereof.

I will be gone most of the week , hell, I don't know when I will be back. But I do miss you all and congrats to the winners of the poetry contest. I think I saw Miss Butters name there

I will be so glad to be back and settled in to my agoraphobic routine. I'm done with P/T after 24 sessions and my neck has only improved 9 % it seems futile.

Anyway...I am glad to see you all up and kicking and I do thank you for your suggestions and will get into the repairs as soon as I can.

be well dear poets

NJ

wakingDown said:

I wanted to thank Angeline and todski for their comments on Fast Rage, and maybe talk a bit about it, if you are okay with that.

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Sure Wd, we can talk about your poem. We can do that here or in a thread or a private message, whatever works for you. Just let me know.

Angeline said:

Sure Wd, we can talk about your poem. We can do that here or in a thread or a private message, whatever works for you. Just let me know.

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Okay. Fast Rage Is one a handful of poems written in certain state. I don't typically know how they come out until the next day when I go back to read them. I seem to post them while in that mindset, so they are going up as (in my opinion, at least) really strong or really weak, and sometimes broken or fragmented. Do you think it would be worthwhile to repost a fixed version of the weaker works when this happens, or just let them rest in peace?
I have worked out a solution to the posting problem in this, I will simply disconnect my router before I get to that point, so I can't post something until I have a chance to review it the next day. I write while intoxicated to a certain extant in everything I do, as I am on a constant regimen of medications, but sometimes the dosages of the nerve blockers and muscle relaxers go very high and that is when I run into this problem. I was just wondering if I should rework and repost broken poems.

wakingDown said:

Okay. Fast Rage Is one a handful of poems written in certain state. I don't typically know how they come out until the next day when I go back to read them. I seem to post them while in that mindset, so they are going up as (in my opinion, at least) really strong or really weak, and sometimes broken or fragmented. Do you think it would be worthwhile to repost a fixed version of the weaker works when this happens, or just let them rest in peace?
I have worked out a solution to the posting problem in this, I will simply disconnect my router before I get to that point, so I can't post something until I have a chance to review it the next day. I write while intoxicated to a certain extant in everything I do, as I am on a constant regimen of medications, but sometimes the dosages of the nerve blockers and muscle relaxers go very high and that is when I run into this problem. I was just wondering if I should rework and repost broken poems.

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I'm sorry for your situation but glad to read your writing because you have skill and powerful things to say. Here's what I think: every poem is "broken" in some sense because the more I write, the more I learn and discover better ways to say things. If the original idea is good, even if just one line or phrase is worth keeping, I save the poem and reread it when I feel I can look at it more critically. I have written poems that I think are good at first read but if I go back (even just a day or two later), I see things I can fix. Many poems that I write now are rewrites of older poems that I've revisited and realized I can improve. Sometimes I take pieces from the older version and add new stuff and other times I just change a few words or punctuation or line breaks. So I believe if there is anything in the poem worth saving, keep it even if only to use a phrase or line in a new, different poem.

And you can always resubmit a poem here. I'll find you the FAQ for it.

I think that's a personal decision though and maybe others would do it differently. Poets? What do you think?

Wd, here is the quote from the FAQ.

I've re-edited my story and want to replace the posted version with my new edited one. How do I do this?

No problem! Simply submit the new version as you submitted the old one, only adding the word "EDITED" to the title (ex. "My Sexy Firefighter Ch. 03 - EDITED") so that we know to replace the old text with the new text. We will then replace the original text with the new text. Your story will retain its previous voting score and views.

Angeline said:

Wd, here is the quote from the FAQ.

I've re-edited my story and want to replace the posted version with my new edited one. How do I do this?

No problem! Simply submit the new version as you submitted the old one, only adding the word "EDITED" to the title (ex. "My Sexy Firefighter Ch. 03 - EDITED") so that we know to replace the old text with the new text. We will then replace the original text with the new text. Your story will retain its previous voting score and views.

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Okay, thank you. I have read the FAQ a few times, but my memory is in shambles, so I don't always catch things like this. I have chunks of old poems that I use for new works as well, but so far I have not reworked anything I have already posted here, I don't think. Abomination was first formed a few years ago, and has been rewritten many many times before becoming what it is now. I like what it now is. I will consider going over the more distorted works that I have posted. Thank you for the information, I appreciate it.

To Wakingdown your writing is powerful, almost everything I have read of yours has emoted something from me. I find it hard to believe that you are new to poetry as well. You have an amazing ability to convey emotion through the written word. If what you are posting is unedited then it is astounding. I am sorry for your situation, but happy to read your work.

Edited to add thank you to Angeline for your strong work as a forum operator and for taking the time to post comments in posts, to help teach and grow new poets and to argue strongly with or against the longer serving poets. Thank you to all others on here that have commented on anything I have posted.

todski28 said:

To Wakingdown your writing is powerful, almost everything I have read of yours has emoted something from me. I find it hard to believe that you are new to poetry as well. You have an amazing ability to convey emotion through the written word. If what you are posting is unedited then it is astounding. I am sorry for your situation, but happy to read your work.

Edited to add thank you to Angeline for your strong work as a forum operator and for taking the time to post comments in posts, to help teach and grow new poets and to argue strongly with or against the longer serving poets. Thank you to all others on here that have commented on anything I have posted.

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Thanks Todski.

It's partly self-serving because when the forum has a lot of people interacting it helps inspire me, but also this is sort of my home after all this time and I love most of what goes on here. As to the arguing, that was going on when I came here and it will never end. That's just my observation. I just try to stay focused on poetry and take a break when I can't.

todski28 said:

To Wakingdown your writing is powerful, almost everything I have read of yours has emoted something from me. I find it hard to believe that you are new to poetry as well. You have an amazing ability to convey emotion through the written word. If what you are posting is unedited then it is astounding. I am sorry for your situation, but happy to read your work.

Edited to add thank you to Angeline for your strong work as a forum operator and for taking the time to post comments in posts, to help teach and grow new poets and to argue strongly with or against the longer serving poets. Thank you to all others on here that have commented on anything I have posted.

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Thank you. I am glad that my work can bring a response in you. I have been trying to write poetry since around two thousand nine or so. So I think I am still rather new. I would ask that you not be sorry for my situation. You and others have expressed sorrow for it. I would ask that you not feel sorrow for me. I was not a good person, I knew what I was risking. What happened to me is something that I think I deserved for the things I have done. There is no need to feel sorry for someone who is paying for their terrible deeds. Thank you for your comment though, it is appreciated. I will continue to write as long as I am able to.

Ange, thanks for your comment on one of my older poems, "Clever Like a Crow". You're the only one that has ever picked up on the eroticism of it. And you're right, it does have those elements, I did write it with a lover in mind.

Is there such thing as a 'list poem'? What I mean is does a list of statements still make it a poem? I've just read what seems to but just that in New Poems

UnderYourSpell said:

Is there such thing as a 'list poem'? What I mean is does a list of statements still make it a poem? I've just read what seems to but just that in New Poems

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There is. I used to teach them to my students because it is a great way to get into writing poems.

Thanks all for the comments on my new and renewed poems, "Don't Eat Cookies In Bed" and "Fragile". The comments as usual are valuable for refining. And thanks for putting up with my re-subs of poems I've long ago deleted.

todski28 said:

well she got an E and a 5 from me, take a bow underyourspell
ahh the joys (sarcasm) of life in two lines.

http://www.literotica.com/p/approaching-old-age

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Annie's little poem is the poem of the week for me. Love the comparison.

Wow I got an E! I'm over the moon Thank you to Todski for the mention and to Harry, Neo and Angeline for your kind comments (I feel like I'm making an Oscars speech!)

UnderYourSpell said:

Is there such thing as a 'list poem'? What I mean is does a list of statements still make it a poem? I've just read what seems to but just that in New Poems

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Bronzeage posted a good one a couple of weeks ago that Angeline commented on

todski28 said:

Bronzeage posted a good one a couple of weeks ago that Angeline commented on

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I vaguely remember reading it ............ I think! Sorry 1.15 am here